Volume I

These illustrative and inspirational stories have been collected for more than thirty years. Some have made their way into books and sermons, others have never seen the face of strangers. While I have roughly edited this material, you will find abbreviations and shortened sentences where you need to fill in the blanks. Use the search function on your computer and enter a keyword and it will look at all 400 pages in a few moments. I hope you find these data helpful and inspiring.

Silence of the Cree Indians

Henry Wiegle, a music teacher in Vancouver, BC, spent summer of 1977 with the Cree – a nomadic group of Indians in Canada’s north. These Indians have a cooperative rather than a competitive society. When a man kills a moose, he will eat some, but give it away to friends. Henry went fishing with one of the men, caught a large fish – gave all away.

Their vocabulary is small – don’t talk very much. But their communication is in what they do. Henry asked a question one night; the next evening the man he asked answered him.

Emphasis: the power of a life to speak.

Fear comes from in us.

Went on 3-day canoe trip down the Swanee River with 7 other couples. Rain, sun, wind – one each day. Saturday night I awakened. Sleeping in a tent, heard this “growling.” Pictured a bobcat walking down the path toward our tent. Felt a cold shiver. Could anticipate his scratching and clawing at the tent.

But then I listened more closely and discovered it was a purring sound being made by air passing through my esophagus making noise because of the congestion.

Most of our fears originate inside us.

Swanee Springs Canoe Trip

Got out to have lunch around an old pool. Nan, bathroom in the trees – new experience for a city girl – slightly rushed by an approaching pickup truck.

Went by where he stopped overlooking the river – introduced ourselves – where you from: Reform, AL>>met a Methodist minister from Elba (Harold John W Bryan??) I’m a minister – seemed to give him permission to tell me his story.

Retired, depressed, alone in the Okefenokee Swamp – Pastor came to him –

“First time in my life I ever felt loved – had felt ‘nobody cares for me’

Wrote “God’s Guitar Man” – playing on radio now

Butt to Butt formation

Describe our Elba football team – coach (from Opp) Clarke

Thought we were so slow and inept, he had the quarterback back up to the center and take the ball backward to facilitate the exchange

Attention -- recognition

Relaxing on the patio

God in all events seeks to bring forth healing

Mary Burgess – married 25 years, divorced and she faced bitterness over being left, being left for a younger woman. Depressed about her income, how she would make it in life. Told no one about the date of her surgery. Faced the event with anxiety.

But coming out of surgery (her eyes twinkled as she spoke, she became animated) and she said, “Thank God I’m alive.”

Much more given her than successful surgery. She survived and with the awareness she was alive everything paled to insignificance. And, the burden of depression left and has not returned.

Love’s Dilemma

Illus. in caring for mother who is becoming senile. Conflict between her well-being and frightening her with the facts of her situation. 4/5/79 called Freddie and talked with her again about the decisions I and she must make.

Decided not to talk about the situation – would do no good and create fear.

(Mrs. Campbell put her husband in a nursing home.)

Abram Sacrifice

Reading of Genesis 22 in Fowler’s class. I identify with Abram – had glimpses of Chris and me walking to the mountain. Can it be that the God who commanded me to sacrifice my son will yet give him back to me? Oh God, I do trust you for this. No, I am hearing you speak.

Let me not forget the phrase: “The mountain of the Lord will provide.”

Life Saga

In January of 1978 I was inspired to investigate Ph D reinstatement. A vague feeling of its importance.

Feb 2, 1979 – readmitted – feeling urge to teach more clearly.

March 1979 – began talks with Ted Bayley – don’t know how this will develop.

April 24 at lunch with George Morris – he stated that he would teach three years. I wonder if that fits into my life destiny.

I feel an excitement about my life happenings.

Differing Views of Life

In Estes Park Colorado – graffiti on toilet wall -- Man is born into this world to suffer and die.

(2^nd) “Bad theology”

(3^rd) Why not?

(4^th) Man is born to be the ears, eyes and feelings of nature.

(5^th) Man is born into this world to live and to experience the fulfillment of his being.

1. fatalist – pessimist
2. neg. -- cynic
3. stoic
4. naturalist
5. Christian

Pettiness

After my first visit with Mrs. Thompson. She called her daughter-in-law to say, “Preacher didn’t say good-by to me.”

Called her – apologized.

She called her daughter – an elder called – “Would you go by and see Miss Nina”

Real problem was Mrs. Robinson – “I know I’m of no value, not worth anything – never have been.”

The “stuff” of the pastor’s life

Hope

On Saturday I was visiting with Ruth Morris. While I was describing plans for the organization of the church, she began crying. Tried to talk but couldn’t.

Finally she said, “I don’t cry when I’m sad, but I do when I’m happy. And we’ve needed an organization for so long. And I feel so happy to know that we will be organized.”

Witness

Karl Branch had visited the church but not too interested until he sat next to Luther Young. Saw the spirit of the man and could not resist getting involved.

Luther is a “resident saint” – peacemaker, minister, worker. “Every church needs one.” Not two but one. Too many saints might not be good.

Rough Plan for Salem

1. August – church sermons: State my view of the church – books to distribute: Cornerstone, Church Alive
2. September – prayer, inspiration, You Are Somebody
3. October -- Stewardship Adventure -- Preaching from Mark: Bible, Prayer, Listening, Tithing, Reconciling, Pledge Day (deacons to follow up with a visit)
4. November – 3 weeks
5. December – God With Us!

Live the Life You Have

Visited Catherine Sheppard. Her son 39 (twin) – named Larry – is dying with cancer. In 15 years lost her father, 10 years husband, five years mother. Now—son.

Doctors have said 6 months to a year – inoperable tumor – vital organs

But he keeps saying “When I get well.” -- Mrs. S feels she must be realistic – face the fact of his death.

I told her my mother said, “Son, you can’t live here with your father dying and face this situation with no hope. I must trust that God is here with me and look to the future. It is the only way that I can make it.”

Larry wants his mother to go places (Daytona), be with him: I say, “He wants to live all his life – don’t bury him before he dies!” He wants the dearest near him while he goes.

Parting – “I’m going with him to Daytona.”

God’s Love for His Child

Ill. Richey Patterson, 4 years old, open heart surgery (August 2, 1979)

Mother Kay leaning over his bed.

“Mother, don’t leave me!”

She sits on side of bed, laying her face next to his, his arm wrapped around her neck.

I saw there the love of God.

Sermon is Born

Visiting with Luther Young. He said preaching is not entertaining, not a lecture – makes you feel a ‘sense of God’.

Went to Smyrna Church (camp meeting). Heard a preacher make a talk. No passion.

I heard an old preacher say, “A sermon is born, not made.”

A mixture of life and faith – passion and power. Word of God wrapped in life-size bites, conceived and delivered through a human soul.

If it has no passion, it has no power!

NO POWER In Jay, Florida – Ole man Frank Jackson – the preacher didn’t have enough power to blow the wadding out of the end of a barrel -- like a fellow shooting at a sapsucker and just the wadding falls out of the barrel.

Yellow Bird Reveals Hope

Buck and Louise Wallace had a child sick 4 ½ years. They cared for him all those years – prayed that Michael would live. Michael died.

Week after – Lou, Buck, and Lou’s mother sitting in den. Yellow bird –not ever seen before. All three got up and walked to the window. Tapped on window 2-3 times. Sat there, walked up and down window will. Flew away into the tree.

All three felt God had spoken. Michael was with him.

Reluctant Rapist

Jan Anderson – room broken into by a rapist

Came in, closed the door, turned on the light.

“Do as I tell you. Take off your clothes.”

Looked – walked away.

Father’s Acceptance

Don Taylor/Shirley

Telling about children –David, Keith, Kristy, Sharon

Keith, 1 year of school – traveled in Europe, 5 years in Amsterdam; handsome, outgoing stud. He became a practicing homosexual and no one knew.

Wrote home “personal and confidential” – “Mom and Dad”

Sister called – “Can I open” – crying, screaming, called mother back at work – call Don. His father slowly opened the letter while sitting on the bed, reads letter aloud – “I thought it was something unmanageable” – (while my heart was breaking inside)

Wrote letter – “got your letter, nothing has changed, we love you – call us as quick as you can”

5 days after letter, a phone call – “Keith, nothing has happened – we love you, and you are our son. Come home.”

“I don’t approve, but I accept Keith. He is my child, and nothing can change that.”

Struck by Grace / Unaware

Pauline Kramer – 10 years ago lost husband and two sons. Had no reason to live, but today is a vibrant human at 71.

David H’man – on a scale from 1-10 where “10 ½” – Mrs. Kramer

What changed you? Does not know. She began to see the world – sky, ocean, trees – music, art, poetry came alive

Bursting with activity – Tuesday group, speakers, programs, picnics and activities

But as David pressed her, she could not identify what had changed her life

She had been “struck by grace” but did not know it – it was grace

Come to the Party

El Chico restaurant – driving down Memorial, waving us in -- “free food on the door”

Seated – do you know what we’re doing? Hostess – “free food, anything on the menu” – we need the practice

Waitress -- “Tell me I’m not dreaming” – “You’re not. We asked bankers, lawyers, and builders, and they didn’t come, so we opened the doors to the whole community."

To partiers -- “I can’t believe it. We are here, order what we want – no bill to pay. Don’t believe –“

Tell others – called Nan – you and Ginger come over (gone) –

As soon as I got home, could not wait to announce to everyone I met – El Chico, having a party

And you see in that generosity I feel a commitment to go back and dine again and take a friend.

And that’s what it’s like for the outsiders in our church. BBQ is just a symbol of THE PARTY

Miss What Is Vital

Man goes in a bird store, all $4.99 – except one $129.95

“But that bird talks and sings.” Buys it (comes back four times)

1. Doesn’t talk nor sing. “Have got a ladder in your bird cage – needs exercise -- $6.95
2. “Do you have a swing – coordination – no -- $8.95
3. “Do you have a mirror – see itself, preen itself -- $12.95
4. Bird is dead – but you would be proud of him. I went in, watched him climb ladder, swing, held the mirror to look at himself – Just before he fell over, said “Don’t they have any bird seed?”

We deal with the exterior – the non-essentials

Decision – relate to loyalty, activity

Man came in from fishing – cheap boat and rig, but boat was full of fish. No one else caught a thing.

Man said, “I’d like to go with you.”

Next day loaded – ask visitor to pick up a small box.

At fish place pulled out stick of dynamite – threw it – splash, hundreds of fish float up, dips them into boat.

Visitor: I’m a game warden with state game and fish commission

Lit a stick of dynamite, handed it to the man

“Looks like you’ve got a decision to make whether you’re going to (brag, be loyal to) your job (tradition), or go fishing.

“Ball is in your court.”

A Funeral

James W Sells, 82 --- the man to whom I owe the most for my ministry at ICR. Gave me a break.

I need to go to Jackson MS – say a thank you and a good-by.

Ross -- “O Matchless Jim Sells” How true. His greatest gift was finding creativity and encouraging and nourishing it.

Do you believe in healing?

Tyndoll Hall, Albertville -- asked me – wanted me to pray for her.

Surgery in Birmingham, staph infection, lost her good eye. Now fearful to go back for additional surgery.

Came forward, anointed with oil, laid hands on her, and the whole group felt caught up in the prayer.

1. lady having surgery on her eyes in 2 weeks – daughter fearful, pray for mother
2. lady had her own eye problem, joined in prayer for herself
3. another was thinking of her daughter

And the Spirit of God acted upon the body of Christ as we prayed for one another. And involved intercession in the hearts of all

House Blessing

Mrs. M. C. Couch – asked us to bless her house

Read Matthew 7 – “house on a rock” – Proverbs 12:7: house of the righteous

And, we blessed every room of the house and asked God to fill that house to overcome the loneliness

She had hardening of the arteries – reminded me of my mother – and I was doing it as unto mother.

Saw Myself

Mary Justice – attended church – “want a visit” – she told of her daughter-in-law, – son in Marines in Turkey

Talked more with her than anyone – told more about herself

Suddenly realized she had found herself – by sharing herself – a peak experience – came home to herself

I claimed this with her as the grace of God

1. she had lived a role: daughter, mother, wife
2. birth of her person – signed register as Mary Justice

Jesus Rides a Camel

Sam McInturff – 2 boys, 5 year old twins, Scott and Troy

Driving by the church – one car parked in the center of the lot

Troy: “Looks like Jesus is at the church. He’s the only one there.”

Scott: “No, that’s not Jesus. He rides a camel.”

O Taste and See

Came in one night and was cleaning out the spoon – had cat food on it, liver cat food

Eagles Concert/ false identity

Sat 15 minutes listening to a group that never played a song I recognized. Finally decided that they were a different group. Wild, heavy rock. Never had seen the Eagles before, so I couldn’t recognize them.

What People Hear

Spoke at Salem on the Invitation to Commitment and had three strong comments:

1. Why did he preach on death?
2. You lost me. I was confused.
3. Best sermon I have ever heard.

You never know what people will hear when you send out your words.

Sacrifice for Values

Grace Thompson, had fire, sued gas company -- $250,000 and looked as if she would win

Began causing friction with her family. Prayed that she would not get the money because it was causing friction in the family.

Lost the next day. Felt grateful with the burden off her shoulders.

Blind Masseur

Buddy – St Pete Y – sees what others miss

What about me?

1. no hair
2. better developed right arm
3. athletic (runs)
4. ten pounds overweight

Sometimes blind people see more than those of us who can see

Ritual continued

Marv and my trip to steam at Ansley

Shower / it’s out of order

Wait

“No steam, repairing the unit”

So we went on anyway

Sat there 15 minutes talking just like always

“This is the first time I’ve seen your eyes while we’re talking

DEVIL--belief in. In 1972 Tom Cousins was chair of the Billy Graham crusade in Atlanta. He was entertaining the staff at his place near Madison Ga. on the night before the Crusade was to open. While having dinner, Tom casually remarked that "He did not believe in a personal devil." There was no controversy but Billy said, "Before this crusade is over, you will." Strange things happened: The planners had arranged for Marta to pick up folks at designated places all over town. On the night that the crusade was to begin, the bus drivers went on a wild=cat strike. The struck for three days. Next, Hosea Williams, a radical black in Atlanta saw this as a chance to make the headlines. He declared that this was a white man's crusade and that the blacks were being co-opted. He called on blacks to surround the stadium and dare any black persons to cross the picket. Third, the planners had installed a back-up address system. On the very first night the original and the back-up had bugs in it and you could hardly tell what the garbled speech was. Tom Cousins says, "That was the week that I began to believe in the devil."

ALSO, a woman in Chattanooga stopped me as I was leaving the lecture hall. "Do you believe in a personal devil."

VISION -- for the city. While we were riding through the woods hunting quail, Tom began to tell me the story of East Lake Country Club. He bought the old Bobby Jones home club for 4 million dollars. He intends to develop a shrine for Bobby Jones. There will be a museum of the clubs etc that he used in the Masters and U. S. and British Opens. He will rebuild the fairways and greens. The best golf architects in the nation have applied for the job. Ben Crenshaw will get the job.

But the real intention is not to build a golf course but to clean up the worst spot in the city. East Lake Meadows has more crime per capita than any like place in the nation. Behind is the Ho Chi Men trail through the woods where drugs are smuggled. These environs are so dangerous that one police car always calls for a back up to go in there.

Tom envisions: reducing the size of East Lake Meadows (rebuild and shrink because the first job was done by a crook who bought off the city officials); to build in the woods behind the housing development the finest golf school in the country. Have something like Chi Chi's kids. These young men who have no hope in the world will be given golf lessons, they will be taught to caddie, and they will be given a salary. Through these measures Tom hopes to see the East Lake Area re-developed.

As soon as he announces plans for the area there will be a rush of money to buy up the old houses and to refurbish them. Through all these measures he hopes to do something that most of us in the church would only talk about. I am impressed with the vision and the potential for Good.

SPIRITUALITY ILLUSTRATIONS

WHY I BELIEVE IN PRAYER .. 1. Because God has invited us to pray -- we ought always to pray -- Enter into your closet -- Enter into his gates with thanksgiving. 2. Because prayer is the most basic form of the God/Human relationship. Relation is bound into four words: help me, lead me, forgive me, thank you. 3. Because prayer must be a the heart of a community's life: a)point of focus; b)connectedness; c. Energy and power, that convictional quality. 4. Because it is the source - or way to the source of our creativity and recreation of life and the future.

LAY WITNESS.. Twenty years ago they had a LWM. "Do you know why we wanted you to come to our church?" -20 years ago, down to 18 persons in our church. --Wrote to you and LW Team came and shared with us ---New Life came to the church -- did the Discipline & Discovery. More of us changed. Now we are a church of 240 members and growing. Good thing about maturity is you get to see a few of the seeds that you planted grow and reproduce.

REVELATION -- Never know when it comes. A discussion on "He descended into hell" Man asked why, not directly stated in scripture. Several answers came forth from the group: 1. I Peter 3, Eph 4, and The Man said, "He experienced hell for us in abandonment on the cross...." Discussion followed. Steve, 35, former R. C. Then he was a Southern. Baptist. and he said, "I see for the first time that I am forgiven." Tallahassee.

NEW YORK --Street Scenes. 1. Vendors, 2. Crowds, 3. Car at Pretzel stand holding up three blocks of traffic. 4. Man with a box laying out cards and shuffling them about, 5. Preaching from Zechariah, 6. Lights/ Trees and window decorations.

REVELATION IN THE SHOWER Interview with advisee. 35 years old, Tide Water College, PSCE. Was telling me of his sudden change and how God spoke to him (No voice but a vision he had never grasped with words) I wondered where he was living at the time: WHERE were you? "IN the shower." I mean what state were you in. "HIGH, real high -- I had been on coke and alcohol. WERE you living? IN SIN.

REAL KNOWLEDGE Not every education person knows much -- Will Rogers said we are ignorant except for a few things. Everybody can be an expert on some things and they can have a specialty that others do not share in. Ronnie was 35, black man. He was a caddie at the PINEHURST INN AND COUNTRY CLUB. He was my caddie--knew the distance of every hole, the club to use, and the break of the green from anywhere you putted. He saw me hit a dozen balls and then pulled the club that he thought I needed. At the green he knew how fast, how much break, or a double break. He knew the course as well or better than I know the bible. And when I did not play a hole well he said, "Forget it, the next hole is a new day." I could begin again. I had a 51 on the front nine of #2 but a 45 on the back side

BEYOND MARKETING THE CHURCH On Jan. 13, 93 I met at the Holiday Inn with the Synod. For 2 and half hours we talked about the same things -- speakers, workshops, attendance etc. As I listened I became heavier and heavier. Then I said, "I'd like to made a few comments: 1. I find myself wondering what this is going to accomplish (have done this for 12 years and we are getting smaller and older still;) 2. I wonder what would happen if we call 16 Presbyteries to a 4 day time of prayer: spoke on payer, worshipped, listened to God and found a fullness in our hearts (Racial Ethnics heard the call, others responded, executives felt threatened.)

GOODLUCK BADLUCK, WHO CAN SAY Sermon by John Claypool. De Mello tells the story of a Chinese Peasant: Horse (ran away) and got seven more, Child broke leg (did no t go to war) Providence in our lives.

Rabbi: "To the Jew there is only one unpardonable sin, despair."''

Sam Keene said to his father: "However you shift your life, I want you to know the great gift you gave to us 4 boys, 'You took delight in us!"

Marney to a woman who was in deep grief and fell in love with Marney: "I appreciate your honesty but I am not able to respond to you."

UNKNOWING. "When Columbus left he did not know where he was going, when he got there, he did not know where he was, and when he got back, he did not know where he had been."

HUMILITY AND UNITY What keeps the man of God going when things are difficulty. Like Joseph of old, "he has a humility appropriate for the mystery. In our divisions we need a humility appropriate to the mystery of the human condition. We have become ideological rather than exploratory. We are split into groups speaking but not able to listen. We must learn to live together into the mystery.

GOD IN THE DAY Some days I do expect God in the day. 1. Marty made an appointment to tell me he could not do the work for the course because his daughter had told them that she was gay (blew his world) 2. Steve came by to tell me that he was interested in Discerning God's will for himself and a friend of his named Margaret. 3. At the Monastery Mark Weaver came there without knowing we were there, providence? Scenes like this make it seem like a good day."

ANXIOUS ABOUT GOD Al Ward said, "I am afraid to think about being in the Image of God." Yet he had preached on the text a few weeks before. When he thought about being in the image of God, he felt ashamed and wanted to hide. Said, "I think I'll read my own sermon -- next day he felt better knowing that he could call me whenever he needed to. He never heard anything like that at Duke Divinity School .... "In fact most of my professors would have thought that any mention of God speaking to us today would have been thought crazy. "It strange to think about God speaking to us today." "Did you ever think how strange it is to be a minister of God and not expect God from time to time to speak to us."

MONSTERS IN THE BASEMENT Caroline Gourley said that the first directive placed her in the midst of creation and make her aware of the monster that lurked in her basement. Frightening. See her first directive in the file.

LACK OF SPIRITUALITY IN LEADERS At a conference in Louisville, one of the ministers said, "How can we send Elders out to minister when they do not have a sense of personal holiness?" One illustration of the lack of spiritualiy at the core of our community of faith.

LEAD DOG Bill Card at Beaver Creek talked about the Dog Sled. You have 8 dogs in 4 teams of 2. His lead dogs are Sasha and Son of Uno. Why do you have Sasha and Uno up front? Because they like to run. -- "if the leader doesn't run the rest will walk." Then if you have another dog in the pack who does not pull his share of the load, the others dogs will eat him up.

SPTY AND EVANGELISM Joan Gray was frustrated with NCD in Cobb county for two years. Then she was at Oglethorpe. She did all the things that Church. Grow tells you to do and yet nothing vital happened in the church. She gathered a small group of persons who were responsible for Evangelism and she asked them these questions: What do you believe? What does it mean to you? What do you want from the church. They began to look around and these folks soon were doing the work of Evangelism. They haltingly spoke of God in their lives. There were not direct of persuasive but God began to work through them. As a result the church began go come alive and they be began asking others to come to church.

CHURCH/MIRACLES "The church is a place that provides an atmosphere where miracles can happen!" Mary Brinig-- associate with Dr. Peele.

LONELINESS Jake Adler greeted me at the Cafeteria at Purdue in the union hall. He wanted to talk. Pleasant but I needed to work on my talk but I prayed, "Lord if you want me to talk with Jake, I will." "Are you alone?" He was a Ph. D.. d. fro Harvard and taught in the English department -- the head of it. Wife died, 15 years ago; most important thing to him had been his family; rules for life -- basically had none. Daughter, Gin, is married to a Pres. minister. Travels all over the world, 57 countries so far and getting ready to leave again. Sunday morning he was back again at 6:30. He told me the same story again. "I had a friend at the U. of Florida, wealthy, His dad gave him a trip to the West Coast with 4 friends -- Jake was one of them. Forty years later he met on a sunny island off the cost of St. Thomas. He owned the island; one was a professor at Washington University. and other a Ph. D. in medicine; 3rd a molecular biologist and a noble prize winner for discovering some aspect of the DNA; and the 4th was a surgeon and he was head of the English Dept at Purdue--had to take food to the island because all that was there was canned food and fish. Who could have been more lonely.

GOD WILL GET YOU Woman at Grace Church in San Antonio was sitting in the back corner alone as we prepared to pray. I said, "Join us in one of the groups." She "I'll just sit here; I'm Presbyterian." Well, you know what Calvin did to Servetus! No. Burned him at the stake! She jumped up and ran to a table and bowed for prayer. Now do we want to get response from people on that tactic?

GOD'S WILL. John Knapp is a consultant in business. Successful. He was concerned abut doing God's will. His mother had said, "What would Jesus do?" Doesn't work very well. Always felt the will of god was --- out there and was something to imitate. But in Dis. God's Will he discovered there were more principles: wholeness, love, service, unity -- these form a scale or a norm by which to make decisions. "I am beginning to see a new way to pursue God's will that makes it a part of me -- not outside and being imposed." Wait until next week when we see it is really inside you and in the structure of your being. Later he was to say that he found it was not like a crystal ball to predict the future.

DISCOVER YOUR WITNESS Margaret was a friend of Jennie's. I asked her, "What would you say to a person that asks you why do you go to church? --I like it (why) Important to me (why) Meets my needs (which). I find my emptiness filled. Here is a person who has faith, loves to share her faith, she serves. But she lacks formation: which is 1. awareness, 2. knowledge of the faith, 3. narrative, 4. integration of faith with narrative, 5. desire to share it with another. Tell me about your payer -- "I don't pray very well or very much." I think my prayers. Sometime say it in the care but I can't prayer before others. Think to much about what I'm saying. I'd rather hear a stumbling prayer than a slick one. Imagine a child learning to talk -- parents and coaches hang on to every word. Will they jeer, tease, be embarrassed? No they are all excited by what effort is being made.

be in partnership to produce and market in new ways so that it creates profits for both. In Canada coke and Pepsi have lost 70% of the market to private labels. Never before have they been willing to sell syrup to bottlers who will distribute their products. The question: are we willing to form uncommon alliances in order to make the gospel available in new and creative ways so that persons and the church and the Glory of God may benefit.

FRIENDSHIP AND RELATIONSHIP -- In China friendship is everything. It is from A to Z in China and everything in between. Where there are deals to be made you must eat, drink and talk to form relationships. In meetings you get to know each other and build trust before you even begin to talk business.

ENDURANCE AND CONTINUATION -- Walter Albritton talked about an Olympic runner. "What will you do after the Olympics? What, when you can't run any longer." When I can't run, jog, when I can't jog, I'll walk, and when I can't crawl, I"ll lie down with my face pointing to the goal.

INNERSTANCE -- Walter Albritton said that "Inner Stance is more important that circumstance."

LUXURY OF SPIRITUALITY -- Tom Martin was a R. C. Priest that I met a course in Berkeley, Ca. He was 22 years a priest and 1 year at Berkeley. He had been in Peru and was originally from Australia. A political Ideologist. "I have always thought that Spirituality is a luxury we can only afford when we have got the world straightened out." But he burned out. Knew the priest role and how to play it but he soon had no substance inside. Read SOMETHING MORE "I know it is basic but it spoke to me. The question on p.__ "Is God really there after all? Do I believe He is?" (In the directive on baptism, he recalled in a powerful way those who had been spiritually formative in his life.

LEFT DEAD PCUSA CHURCH (Dick Dorf) Dick was married to a Pres. minister. He had been 40 years in the church. He is no dummy. A Prof. of business at U. Cal. Davis. Had been an Elder. Had gotten bored with church service and music. One Sunday he was reading the paper with on the town square. Two friendly folks came by and asked, "Have you ever been to the UCC church?" The talked of how good it was -- Sermon, Music, Pastor. He decided to visit. "Don't I know you?" the pastor said. "I know your wife. She is a minister and I've met her before." Now they go regularly to this UCC because it is alive and responsive to human need. (Dick, professor, active in the community, and wealthy. Once told me that their church used the Teflon method of evangelism -- covered everything with Teflon and if anyone could stick they could stay.{

UNPREPARED FOR FUNERAL I was called upon impromptu to do a funeral. Not ready, not know what to say. People of the family were in a room I passed and they were filled with sadness. Negro choir with robes were there. The leader said to me "We'll sing until you can figure out what do do." I'm searching for something. Suddenly I realize I have a life vest like on a rafting trip or a canoe trip. Mercifully I wake up.

POEM -- LET ME BE YOUR GUIDE.

Will you let me be your servant,

let me be as Christ to you?

Pray that I may have the grade to

let you be my servant, too.

We are pilgrims on a journey,

Brothers, sisters on this road.

We are here to help each other

Walk the mile and bear the load.

I will hold the Christ-light for you

In the night-time of your fear;

I will hold my hand out to you,

Speak the peace you long to hear.

I will weep when you are weeping,

When you laugh I'll laugh with you.

I will share your joy and sorrow

Till we've seen this journey through.

This was a poem given me by Libba Pendergrast after she had come to me to share with me some of her feelings. She had wanted me to help the Emory Church and then the Minster was threatened by me and I bailed out. But through this experience she and I became friends. At lunch she told me about the emptiness of her marriage and her longing for spiritual companionship.

WHERE ARE YOU FROM A 5 year old was asked, "Where are you from? "I'm from ;planet earth." Four year old asked, "What day is it?" "Tomorrow."

Paradigm: A paradigm provides lens -- like filters through which we see the world. MAPS -- a map of LA won't help in Atlanta. Belief -- Value we give (fly over a wall, child as saint). "To make a significant change we must have a shift in paradigms. Apply to the church.

CHANGES NEEDED. A lady said: 1. We need to shift from the few to the many -- pillars to pewsitters. 2. Shift from a gathering of persons to the Body of Christ. 3. Shift from a few gifted to the fact that all have gifts.

LET ME BE YOUR SERVANT, TOO

We are pilgrims on a journey,

Brothers, sisters on this road.

We are here to help each other

Walk the mile and bear the load.

I will hold the Christ-light for you

In the night-time of your fear;

I will hold my hand out to you, you..

CONNECTION WITH LIFE PRAYER AND LIFE In a retreat in Ohio I had spoken on the Marker Events of a man's life. And I had asked them to make these chapters and think of them i the context of Creation, Election, Predestination, and Providence. After defining these theological categories, I asked them to look at the movement of their lives as if they were in a womb. When they entered into each of the markers I suggested that they ask four questions: 1. What was going on in my life -- people, situation, struggle, context; 2. Give thanks to God for your life; 3. Wonder what God was doing in your life a that stage. 4. And, How did the events of that time and place affect where you are today.It was a good and beneficial exercise and a number of people really got into the flow of their lives.

In the afternoon I talked with them about Spirituality, then showed the Forms of Spty, and The Phenomenology of Prayer. Afterward Bobby said to me, I began to see a relation between the movement of my life and the forms of prayer. I am all over the place in the prayer styles and these are somehow conditioned by the events and context of my life.

GRIEF AIDS LOVE FOR A MAN Pam came to my room to talk about the burial of a friend. Between college and Seminary she had been very close friends with him. They had done lots of things together. He gave her much of what she needed as a woman. Then she went to seminary and he on to Florida or the West Coast. They stayed in contact by phone even after she was married and a minister. There had never been sexual contact, and her husband did not feel threatened by the experience. But then Gary got sick. Pneumonia. Do I have to ask if he had aids? NO. And she was going to see him after Xmas but when she called, his father said, "Gary is dead." They asked her to do the funeral in Ohio. I can't. But because the Church of Christ minister would not work with a woman she did the whole thing. Now she is left with her grief and her love for Gary that does not make good sense for a married woman. How does she resolve this? (I suggested a counselor, spiritual director. And, I asked her about telling her husband. No, he can't handle things like this. Then, write a dialogue with Gary and thank him and let him go. But she really was not ready to let go of the experience. So I decided to let it go and let her hold on to it.

PERMISSION Don't participate Old man in Bristol Va at the first FDW week end. When we were filling out some forms, He said, "I can't see ( a fellow said, do you want me to read it for you); I can't hear either (I'll speak louder the volunteer said; "Well I can't write, I've got arthritis in my hand. The volunteer said, "I guess that I can't do anything to help you." Why don't you just watch.

The next night the old man said in a small group: "I'm 55 years old and married but I've been unfaithful for the last 40 years. I'm an alcoholic too and every time I've waked up from a drunk it has been with a different woman."

CASUAL DEATH While he was making the announcements, someone said to Mike Hall, "Are you going to mention Will Powers?" "O yes, will died, his funeral was at 11:00, lets pray for his family and all." casual mention.

LONELINESS An American Indian said to a friend of mine "Grandfather said God gave us the gift of loneliness so that out of our pain we would come to each other." If loneliness is one of the great factors of our time address it: hunger to be understood, to be accepted, worth being recognized and affirmed; ability to give what you've got. In giving union comes -- union with another. Negative images of loneliness: isolation, odd, don't feel we fit; fear to be seen and wish we were invisible.

GIVE YOUR BEST Jay Hohfeler said "It would have been great, if only I had known how to repair telephones. In the summer of 83 SC Bell had a strike, hurricane and thousands of homes were without phones. They kept calling and trying to get help. Here was an office manager in the home trying to give these people service.

SHOW YOUR ASS Not everyone who shows her ass is a fool. Hilary was a classmate of Holly our daughter. When she was in the 8th grade and a cheerleader she was expelled from Lakeside for mooning the boys in the back of the bus. She later got a role in "All my Children."

MEANING OF LIFE AFTER 50 I was concerned that Jerry had ruled God out of his life because of MV and his Mother He said, "Religion just creates too much conflict in me. I argue with MV and I'm made at myself. He built a wall that he hides behind and it is very thick he said. I said, "I wonder if you are caging a monster. But in these years, it is time to seek God, the meaning of your life, loss of physical powers, In 15 years how will it be when you don't pay much squash, tennis and golf. If MV would change can't really ask her to do that. Where should he begin List all your hurts from your mother and forgive her; Look at your image of God and see if it is really God or your mother.

SEARCH FOR IDENTITY Bryan was a graduate of N. C. He spent a year in New Zealand, Australia, and Tokyo. He spoke of himself: I don't know what to do; I have so many different faces to put on I don't feel real; I play the part I'm expected to -- thinking about seminary and world missions; First dad expects me to go in the business; The business is lucrative but I don't do it for money. I don't have to worry about money. All this sounds so much like a confused boy who does not know who he is.

TWO LOVES She came to talk with me after the first meeting on the retreat. She had a friend Gary who was warm, sympathetic, and compassionate; she was married to a man who was cold, distant, and dependable. She had met her husband at seminary after a summer and a year of experimentation. She had called Gary, written to him and stayed in close contact. Then she heard he was ill. He had aids. She wanted to see him and planned to after Christmas but he got more ill. When she called the hospital his father said, "Gary is dead." They asked her to do the funeral in Ohio. I can't I am too close to him. But when the Church of Christ minister would not let her participate (woman) she said, "I will do the funeral." God gave her strength but when she spoke with me she still was trying to work out her two loves.

UNWELCOME Nate, in Nyack N. Y. a precious pastorate while at Princeton. A small church in a small town. Built a new church a black couple visited it. Two ladies were heard to say in loud whispers, "Why don't they go to their own church." And they never came back.

A CHURCH'S MYTH If you want to know a church you must understand their myth. These questions will help you get into the myth. 1. How did it start. 2. Who built this building. 3. How was the 1st preacher (who and how good and how remembered). 4. How old is the church. 5. How many in the nursery. 6. How many different groups are there in the church beginning with the charter members. 7. New pews -- had 100 left we did not need. 8. A beginning pastor (Jerry Hammett) 9. Was building the new building your goal.

KNOW A LOT The woman sat next to me on the plan to Omaha. She saw that I was working on a lap top computer. She asked me a few questions. I told her a few of the things that it would do, how to use it in my work, and what potential it had. She listened with amazement. "You are so brilliant regarding computers!" I said, "No mam, I'm not. Its just when you meet someone who knows about something that you are completely ignorant of, it just seems that they are brilliant. I told a group who wanted to know about faith sharing this story. It is the same for them. When you seem to know much about what they don't know anything about.

THREE EAR-RINGS He got on the plane in Dallas. I never saw a man with three ear rings in his nose and one in his ear. I didn't know they dressed 'em like that in Texas.

SHOCKED INTO A CALL Marvin Taylor from S. Go worked in computes with IBM. He repaired collators (in the dark ages) and a man said to him "Fifty years from now we will be sitting around sorting cards." It was a kairos moment because Marvin suddenly realized the truth of the statement if he did not do something to change his situation. He began to think: What do I like; What do I dislike; What do I do best; Who do I respect. A supply minister asked him, "Did you ever think about being a minister." "Yes, and I'll be there next year, " he said.

GOSPEL IN BAPTISM Harry, a UMC minister in S. G. told of baptizing a young girl who wanted to be immersed. He and the congregation went to the creek. It was an old swimming hole. A motorcycle gang was there in swimming. They asked if they could use the creek for a baptism. The whole tattooed gang with the girls got out of the swimming hole. Harry baptized the initiate. A week later a girl who was with the gang called and stated, "I heard what you said at the baptism; I'd like to join your church and follow your Christ." Christ died, was buried, and we are raised with him in baptism.

KINGDOM IN MINIATURE Nan and I went to the Dekalb Farmer's Mkt. A vast 100,000 sq ft. park 400-500 cars. 50foot ceilings. Tons of groceries of every kind from every country. Boc Choy, fruit, fish from the sea, fresh, canned, tons of it. And every type person, all ages, baby to persons in a wheel chair. 50 check out stands, checker could hardly speak English, immigrants, the chief source of employees, and they bring family and friends. I Speak English and ­­­­­­­ No homogeneous unity principle., Service, Style, Access.)

DO YOU KNOW GOD? Rita Pierson's grandson Darrell Franklin Carpenter. A beautify, shy kid. "Grandma, do you know God? Yes! Do you? Yes! Why did you ask me, if I knew God. "Well, you know everyone else and I supposed that you knew God too."

ON FIRE WHEN I GOT INTO IT. Man was charged with drunk and disorderly conduct and setting a bed on fire. "Yes, your honor, I am guilty of drunk and disorderly conduct but the bed was on fire when I got in it."

COUNT YOUR MEMBERS? How do you? I heard a man giving a report once who said, "We have 160 churches in the World Alliance of Reformed Churches. We don't know how many Christians that represents . . . (laugh) I don't mean it in a pious way or a way of examining persons for authenticity. But we count members in different ways: all the baptized, all the communing members, the constituents, , and for all I know --- a goodly number of the beloved departed." If we don't turn the denomination around we may have to add back some of the departed to keep our rolls up."

SATISFACTION Joe Roberts, black preacher, paraphrased Kierkegaard: "The reason these geese don't fly is that the corn is too good and the barnyard is too secure." Add to the story of the eaglet.

WHO IS THE JUDGE My preacher went to county court. The question that each of us would have been asking was "How can I get off." But the old experienced hands who had been brought in on some vagrancy or other offense asked "Who is the judge today?"

NARRATIVE Tom Long said "Narrative is the form par excellence of the Christian Faith."

SET GOALS/ENTHUSIASM Someone told of the nuclear explosion and there were only 4 persons left on earth. Two were Baptists and they found each other and began a Sunday School. They set a goal of 4 but had 5 and in their enthusiasm reported 8.'

BEYOND UNDERSTANDING Tom Long tells about a man who attends Princeton Church. He is a Mr. Smith. To sat next to him on Wednesday evening. Here is a church filled with intellectuals. He said to Tom, "I'm probably the last non-intellectual left in this church." "I've been coming here for 25 years and haven't understood a word in the 25 years." Why do you keep coming. Because every week I go to a correctional institution and meet with those boys; I feel my life is worth while and I couldn't do that if I didn't represent the church.

PASTOR'S WEEK/SCHEDULE The phone rings. The minister is busy getting his sermon on Friday morning. "With whom am I speaking?" J. S. Simpson, pastor of First Church. I'm doing a brief survey: what have you been doing this week? 1) visit the hospital; 2. Tom Caleandro to pledge to the new building, 3. two couples for counseling, 4. got a problem with the wok over the use of the fellowship hall, 5. had 1 long talk with my wife about neglecting her and the 2 kinds -- she says I'm married to the damn church, 6. Truthfully, I don't have time to talk, I got to get this sermon ready for Sunday By the way, who did you say was calling? "I didn't ....perhaps its better if I don't say ... a note of sadness in his voice. Frankly, I got sick from listening to your list."

INFLUENCE Nan and I went to a movie at the Draft House (years ago). We saw the Color of Money, a bad review but a good movie, something is wrong with me, I like the movies that the reviewers say are rotten. We came out and I was helping Nan in the car. At the same time a couple next to us in their 40's were arriving. When the woman saw me helping Nan into the car, she said, "You come around here and open my door." Stunned, he asked, "What did you say ........ Come open my door......like this man did for her.

POSITIVE RESPONSE/TO PAIN Irmagene Holloway had an auto accident when she was a young woman. She made the accident work for her. She began work with the American Auto. Association AAA, They sent her to NY University to study how to minimize accidents. Then she became a Safety Program Specialist for Public Health Service. She said that she had always asked of her situation: "How can I help persons avoid the suffering I have had to endure?" She was the inspiration of Dodge City at 80 years of age.

SPEAKING WITH PASSION In Dodge City I met Mrs. Young who taught a course in Kansas History. She had oral reports. One lady chose tell the group about a red ribbon that had been given to her faith as a volunteer fireman. She told it with such feeling she almost came to tears. So did the class. This is so different from most of our sermons -- we can talk about Christ with such matter of factness that no one is moved, not even ourselves.

ECUMENISM AND EVANGELISM "The problem of the church's mission is the crisis of the ecumenical movement. If an ecumenical movement is not primarily a strategy of worldwide evangelism, then it is nothing but an interesting academic exercise." Bishop Steven Neil Inward focus, Organizational Morass, Time commitment, Administration syndrome, Energy expenditure.

CHRISTIAN WITNESS Dr. Visse'rt Hooft said that the Church's witness has a boomerang effect. The church goes into the world and says, "Do you know that you belong to Jesus Christ?" And the echo comes back from the world, "Do you know that you belong to Jesus Christ?" Church must become what it believes it is!

CHURCH AND EVANGELISM John Stott says, "There can be no evangelism without the church. The message come from a community that embodies it and which welcomes into its fellowship those who receive it."

LIFE/ HOW TO SPELL IT Drop the F and it is a lie, a person who is false; Change IF and you call for a change of circumstance; Substitute ov for if and you get love; Capitalize the I and "I" becomes the center of life. Tastes Great; Less Filling -- that is the way some of our addictions.

I STILL DO Tom was telling about Hal Lindsay, the Second Coming and how the end will come. "I ran some of my best friends out of the church piling this stuff on them." Bob Chastain said, "I'm still doing that."

ANXIOUS ABOUT SPEAKING After the retreat from my church, a man said to me. I appreciate the way you spoke, I feel awe of those who can stand and talk about God and life. Most folks, at least I, feel uncomfortable when I try to speak about God. I have those strange sensations in my stomach, feel anxious, afraid --- this is so unlike speaking for IBM or Burroughs where everything is spelled out in a manual or corporate guideline. But that is how life is! It is not all spelled out, you have to fill in many of the blanks and step across the ditches when you cannot see where you are going.

HOPE/ MUST HAVE I had told my mother to face up to the fact that dad was going to die. She said, "Son, when you have to look at him and serve him all day, you cannot do it if you believe he is dying. You have to have HOPE to go on."

SPEAK A GOOD WORD FOR JESUS John McLaurin was getting ready to preach his first sermon at his first call to a church. He researched it, it was a sermon of form and erudition. Went to an aged mother and told him of his fears and his desires. She said "Laddie, just say a good word for Jesus." He tore up the sermon. Stood there hoping that Christ would speak through him. Afterward to an elder he said, "What do you think?" He responded, "There was a man sent from God whose name was John...."

DEATH/DYING On his dying bed John Knox wanted the Bible read aloud -- Ps. 9 "The wicked ... and all the nations that forget God." The needy shall not always be forgotten; the expectation of the poor shall not perish forever. Isa. 53, Calvin's sermons and his beloved John 17. He died surrounded by friends and the word. The epitaph on his tomb reads: "Here lies one who neither flattered nor feared any flesh."

PRES/ETHOS The faith of Presbyterians was born in the midst of political struggle. Overthrow Catholics. When the princes came to Knox asking for guidance, he said we have 3 tasks: 1. The Spiritual welfare of the people, 2. the education of the children (a school attached to every church), 3. the needs of the poor. These form the ethos of the PCUSA.

Knox was often discouraged but he kept on preaching. Once he preached at Greyfriars church but he declared in spite of their trusting the arm of flesh ---"their cause, in spirit of Satan, shall prevail, for it is the truth of the Eternal God."

CALVIN CREST In contrast with Luther Calvin spoke little of his spiritual experience. The Crest describes his devotion. In the crest is seen an outstretched arm; the hand grasps a heart in flame which it offers to God. These words are inscribed in a circle. "My heart I give thee, Lord, eagerly and sincerely." It can be said that Calvin became a theologian through his heart." Mackay. We cannot be true to the founding vision unless we are inflamed with a passion for God.

"For deep in the heart of Calvinism, and in Presbyterianism in its truest and most classical form, resides a profound piety, that is, a personal experience of God linked to a passionate devotion to God." John Mackay

GET YOU ANTS Doug Simmons daughter was in the pastor's time with children. Whose ants are these she asked. God's She looked up to heaven and said, "God get your ants; they are right here." Felt that way when they covered everything in the kitchen.

EVANGELISM, EVERYTHING WE DO In Montreat, when the groups gathered to define the mission of the church, the drafting committee brought back a copy. It spoke of justice, equality, poor, social order. The delegates said, "What about evangelism?" Why Evangelism is everything we do, thus we need not distinguish it. Dissatisfied, the delegates demanded Evangelism to be included. In a real sense many of us still think this is true.

NOTHING LIFE Bob Sherman was drinking beer, taking up money for a band. It hit him, my life is going to pot, things that I can't bear are going on with me. Looked up to heaven and asked, "What is my life doing? Where is it going?" Instantly came the answer back: "Nothing, Nowhere." Found a young life leader and got his life straight and finished college and seminary and now serves God in Florida. Lot of folk like that .

THREE LENSES Carolyn had contacts. She lost one and could not find it. Dr. look and found it, looked again in her eye and found a second. Eye kept hurting. Finally she rubbed her eye and three contexts fell out. Over kill.

IDOLATRY As defined by P. Tillich. 1. Dehumanizes -- like god, like people. 2. Robs God of the relation; 3. appeals to selfishness by using idols to get what we want. 4. Gives superstitious power to the priest as the keeper of the idols. -- these surely fit when we think about modern idolatry of money, sex, and power.

VISION/MINISTER/PERSISTENT B.J. Steinbrook concerned himself with the question: "Why can't the church have the Spirit?" FCA in H. S. Dough Coe and the prayer breakfast in Oklahoma. Went to work for the bank in Bartlesville. They sent him around, met Fred in transmittals. They began a small group. On Good Friday the first year, he and Fred led a service and 1/2 the bank employees came. Came to Covenant with that experience behind him. He and one guy met for a year praying for a renewal in the church. It got very dark, nothing happened. Now they have 30 persons in a monthly get to gather in small groups.

RETIRED/BEFORE/RETIRED Tal Haynes met me at the airport. The church is in trouble he said in 66 we had 1400 members. Today 575 with 150 in attendance. A budget of $175,000. No effective in outreach. Tal was in his second marriage, 2 years ago go married. He opened a shop Britain's Best Ltd. His attitude toward the church was gloom and doom. He must hold on for 2 more years. His energy was inn the shop -- the mention of the shop gave energy and excitement, had to take me down to show it to me, Of course he had to make frequent trips to England. London Center Import License -- Working nights and week ends to make it successful. Full of enthusiasm for the day that he can retire and get out of the ministry. Christ's church will be used for 2 years, people will starve while the business gets going. Again, Ed Grider said 40% of the clergy rather be doing something else if they thought they could make a living.

UNWELCOME RESPONSE I had done my best. Maybe it was not good or good enough, but my best. This old man 65 years or more came up in the fellowship hall and asked, "Do you ever read Plan Truth." No. Well, you ought to. Then he paid me a backhanded compliment. "You almost came up to Herbert W. Armstrong." I know he was praising me but someone could have overheard and what would they have thought. He said again, "You need to read him, he will help you."

Just reminded me of another man. I had given a talk and he came up to tell me how great Louis Evans is. I know he is great but do you think that is so relevant for the moment."

SOMEONE ELSE TO WITNESS Mrs. McKitheran said I have 4 new families in my neighborhood with 10 children. They need to be in the church but they need young adults and not someone 75 years old. And, besides I have little boy's football and baseball because they have broken out 3 windows and I think they will be more likely to come if some one else invites them. Do we often think the same way because our lives have not measured up to the standard of Christ.

SELF-SACRIFICE When we were in Florence visiting an art museum there was a strange sight over the crucifixion scene -- a goose plucking herself and blood flowing from her inside the mouth of one of her off-spring. When I looked questioningly, Chris said to me, "Don't you know how geese bite their own flesh to fed their young, if here is no food available?" Is this what took place on the cross? Did the Father open his heart to let the divine life flow into us through Christ?

FAITH COMES ALIVE Clair Zak was born to polio victims. The doctors had said they would never have children but they had three. Clair went to church for years but never made contact with the Spirit and so she became a Hari Krishner. "They never taught me about the God within," the spiritual depth of the faith. From 22 to 30 she dropped out of church, lived with a Roman Catholic and they worshipped with Harri Krishners. "But, she said, as I worshipped through the Bahgavadida, I began to worship the God of my youth, the symbols of faith came alive for the first time." At 30, she and her lover went to worship in a RC church and she said, "I realized Christ was the most wonderful man in the world." A friend asked me to attend Marble and I have begun to grow in my faith. Now she wants to know if she is called to minister. Florence said, "Claire has an enormous capacity for spirituality."

STRESS IN LIFE -- look at how your spend your time. 1. List how you have spent the week. 2. Analyze: a) circle all you do from inside out\ what you enjoy; b) Place a (plus) by those things that energize you and a (- minus) but those things that drain you; c) prioritize the 10 most important aspects of your week; 3. What do you learn about your stress?

AFFIRMATION I had preached on the commission of Christ to Presbyterians and a woman said to me: "You are the good news; you are the continuing revelation of Jesus Christ; You are called to be the listener, the actualizer, the affirmer."

FAITH John MacKay once said to Kirk Hudson, "If this church does not come to grips with what it believes, the neo-Pentecostals and the Catholics will take the country."

SEE JESUS Kirk Hudson told of his son who was 16 and came down with a huge lump the size of a grapefruit in his throat. The doctor said, "You don't have long to live." He talked to him, his mother gave him medicine. "Dad, do you really believe? I mean about God and Jesus and all?" Kirk, "Yes, yes I think so." Will I see Jesus when I die? Taking him to the hospital Kirk heard him saying, "Lift up your hearts, we lift them up to the Lord . . . " At the hospital he said, "Dad, let's pray . .. not out loud, let's be quiet together."

ADOPTION A little boy appeared on Kirk's door step: "I've come to live with you," he said. In a bit the phone rang. The woman said, "My husband and I are 2 attorneys, we're too busy to parent this child, will you take him?" I'll have to talk it over with my family but I feel sure the answer is yes. Just 3 weeks ago I buried my 16 year old and I can't risk loosing another son, you must let us adopt him. "Go ahead and start the proceedings." In 87 he graduated from college. Did God send a son?

SILENCE A member said, "I think we should begin the Session meeting with prayer." Kirk couldn't oppose it, like opposing your mother. The session voted 100% to do it. At the first meeting all were present. A member came late, "Where is the Session." They are in the sanctuary in prayer. Silence in a Session meeting. The practice spilled over into every other committee -- began by listening to God.

WRONG FUNERAL Betsy"s "auntie and Unkie" read the obituary every day. They often went to funerals of their friends. One day Unkie was sitting at a funeral, in a church and the man next to him asked, "Who is the minister?" Unkie said, "I hate to tell you, I don't even know the deceased."

CHANGE OF NAME/ DOESN'T MATTER A minister in Missouri told me that in Southern Missouri he used to play at a road house. The place was called "Maggie's" Maggie wanted to up grade the roadhouse so she closed for a time and renamed it "Margaret's Cotillion." But the same crowd of drunks gathered to drink, dance, and fight. New name but the same character.

UNTO ONE OF THE LEAST Lena showed up when Doug Oldenburg visited the housing project. She was obese, smelly, ill-kempt. But she joined Covenant Church. Got a letter from a member who was a bit annoyed. Every Sunday she would ask Doug, "Do I look good?" Finally, he called her in and asked, "How often do you bathe?" Every week? When I get around to it. How often do you bathe, Doug? Everyday. "What a waste of water. So she bathed, came to church with her hair fixed, a new dress, and smelling good. "How do I look?" Just great. One of the least of these, my sisters.

RUDE WITNESS--CONFRONTATION At the close of the service at St. Giles, Ken, the secretary's husband, stood and made a speech: "I was 40 years an Episcopalian, 6 years a UMC, and was also a steward but also a lost sinner.." I went to the FGBMF and somebody button-holed me and asked if I were saved. I don't care about the PCUSA, the UMC or any denomination. All the Pres. Lutheran, and UMC are ineffective because their ministers are apostate. The evidence is that no one is being saved. I said, "Thank you for your statement but I find myself in real disagreement with your position." After the session he came up to continue the discussion. He began his advocacy again. If what I am saying sounds judgmental ......."It is judgmental" He continued. I said, "A little humility wouldn't hurt you any. But he continued, "I have saved more souls than any preacher I know." Now the truth is out, he is better than all of us.

FAILURE "Having a failure doesn't make you one!" I met Ron Beyer at Camp Manotockwa. He was pastor of a 1700 member church in Michigan. He was a great success. Built the attendance, membership, and buildings. Found himself on a treadmill and in the stress of the moment had an affair. Some of the ministers said that he ought to go to the West Coast and start over. He said, "No, this is where I failed and here I must confront myself and my wrong and make it right." He did. One night he was sitting at a restaurant when a man came up to him and said, "You don't deserve to be in the ministry. You're not good enough!" True. True he said, It is only by the grace and mercy of God that I can minister for Christ.

ICE/FIRE Someone was complaining to Dr. George Buttrick about the fanatics and holier than thou folks in the church. He said, "This is the least of our problems; we still have more ice than fire in the church."

BALANCE THE PLANE The stewardess asked me to sit in 2-D to help balance the plane. "I knew that I was a little over weight but not enough to throw the whole plane out of kilter."

SPACE TO BE HUMAN "God gives us space to be human." The space between human life and the throne. An altar sits in that space declaring the forgiveness which creates the space to be free before God."

A TAXI WITNESS Walter Boomershine came to tell me about his experience of "being witnessed to." Four business men were in a taxi in Miami, talking business. The driver asked, "May I tell you something? (silence) "If you don't have Christ, your life is not complete." He explained. Not preachy, but clear. Walter said I had two reactions: 1) An enormous respect for him; 2) a feeling of guilt and inadequacy. One unknown cab driver affected 4 unconscious business men.

SILENT WITNESS "Come unto me." Inscribed on the window of NAPC. A man in the mid-west told me of being in Atlanta. He joined AA but that was not enough. One day he read the inscription in the window of NA. "Come unto me." It was the needed dimension.

EXPAND CHURCH A Lady at Fairmont PC told me of visiting a lay person in Tokyo. The pastor, she was told, expands the church by having members bring friends to their home and one elder tells his faith story. She said, "I heard my host do it." What did he said, "My father was a model for me to follow; he showed me Christ."

KNOWING GOD Ken Woodward is 41 years old. He had a daughter 21 who inherited some money and spent $35,000 in two months. He had accepted God but it was really a blank. After his daughter's life threatening illness, he came to God as a companion. (He is now dead.)

SPTY AND EVANGELISM Joan Gray was frustrated with NCD in Cobb county for two years. Then she was at Oglethorpe. She did all the things that Church. Grow tells you to do and yet nothing vital happened in the church. She gathered a small group of persons who were responsible for Evangelism and she asked them these questions: What do you believe? What does it mean to you? What do you want from the church. They began to look around and these folks soon were doing the work of Evangelism. They haltingly spoke of God in their lives. There were not direct of persuasive but God began to work through them. As a result the church began go come alive and they be began asking others to come to church.

1992

STORY TWO

WHY ARE WE PRESBYTERIANS Walter Brueggemann asked me, "Why do you think that Pres. are Pres? Because they resent narrow Baptist, emotional charismatics, energetic Mormons, strict Seventh Day Adventists.?" But we like being Pres. because you can be Pres. and not feel yourself too different from the culture. We are not radical, religious fanatics --- but normal, self-contained individuals who have a reasonable, comfortable faith.

CHAPTEL HILL ON PALM SUNDAY --- At 8:20 I arrived for a 9:00 a.m. service. People were busily getting prepared for the service: bell choir was rehearsing, the chapel choir was assembling, greeters were taking their places, all last minute details were being taken care of. Gathered in a multi-purpose gym --Pilate's Judgment seat was at the center of the stage, a cross was set also for the Passion Play that evening. A thin lectern was sitting at the center of the stage. The room was filled with about 500 chairs -- no bibles, nor hymnals. Early arrivals were smiling and greeting each other warmly. At 8:55 the building was only 1/3 full. At 9:02 it was about 80% filled. Bulletin had a broad liturgy and all the hymns were printed in the bulletin with the congregational responses. The ages varied, covered the spectrum but a large # of the congregation was past 50. Dress was also mixed with most men in ties and dress shirts but the women wore dresses or skirts. Slacks and sweaters without ties were also in abundance. Prelude. came from the piano with the choir was in place. I saw one lady with a hat; it was pink with a violet (deep purple) rose in the band along with a green, ivy leaf.

Mark Toone began with humor, casual and informal. The service was fast moving. It had Bible content and spiritual impact. No closing hymn. Afterward the alcoves filled, clusters of 10 persons gathered, coffee talk with 20 minutes.

POOL OF LOVE -- (or, Vital Core) When Mark went to Gig Harbor a group of men were invited to pray and study scripture. Met on Wed at 6:30. They gave 15 minutes to Bible study and 20 min to talk in groups, 15 min to prayer. Here faith is alive with pastor and members finding support. New persons can be brought here to be exposed to the faith and from this group many leaders are born. Here the pastor floats out new ideas for the future life of the church.

HUNGER FOR GOD -- Al Ward picked me up at the airport and on the way to Morganton talked with me about his experience with the Spiritual Directives. "Agnes of God" his Sp Dir. He did directives mechanically. She said, "Let yourself go, go with the flow of your ideas that come.. He began to encounter God. I have been hungry for this (sp. dir. "this stuff"). Al led a SS class in a meditation (Ignatian) on Palm Sunday. Strong Response! Lady said, "When are you going to add this to Sunday Worship?" Al: "I couldn't have done these without a guide." Never had anything like this in seminary.

OAKHURST CHURCH -- another model. In 1970 there was redevelopment of buttermilk bottom. (S. DeKalb) By 1983 the membership was down for 900 to 80 members -- white flight. Commitments: God has claimed us by the blood of Christ. Most persons define themselves by their comforts. Live out the gospel in the world (two principles that guide their live together.) They have 150 members with 120 in regular attendance. Takes a long time to decide to join this church, says the pastor. Mission of the church is to all persons. Efforts have been made to reach gay and lesbian, blacks meet to push the city on safety for the children, toddlers come for school who have mothers but no fathers.

Christine -- black, elder. She is the daughter of a Baptist min. went to all white Pres. Ch in D. C. She wanted to see if she could make a change in things over 17 years. Teacher in Tucker for 20 years. Elder at Oakhurst. A church of educated ignorant, rich, poor. Like a family we give support to each other. In school she was given the poorest students and so she gave them extra time. 1 little body who cold not read, got exceptional result. On her last day parents sent a limo to pick her up and take her home.

Rebecca Linafeld. non=church person, became interested. Had been to church, heard the words but did not see the action. Here all kinds of people, action with faith, work with toddlers, gospel choir, heard the truth and saw it demonstrated in the people. Witness of Being!

Nibs said, "I wish I had been taught plumbing in seminary, I would do a lot better at this church."

Worship: Experience of the KOG --drawl the line, we are a new creation. Chg. fellowship to bring joy and pain to the service and express it. Music is both chancel and gospel choir. Time barrier, to get past 12:00 a.m. no problem here. Shift sermon to the end.

Gay Issue: Old conservative elder "We don't know how to work out the sexual issue, but whoever God sends will be welcomed by us."

PARADIGM FOR PCUSA Change in the church. This clergy coups was invited to Bend. It was known as a liberal church, had 400 members. They said, "We can’t come unless you want evangelism." "What is that?" If you tell us what it is, we can do it. Now this church is open with new music, welcome, education classes for al, different kinds of folk, a few gay and lesbians. A Paradigm for the PCUSA -- if this older group of fok can change, welcome 1950 folk and have new kinds of music and small groups, then any of our churches can change. Many of the old folk are patient with the self-cengtered, indulgent boomers. They serve as hosts, sponsors, role models, and mentors.

LIMINALITY -- Victor Turner. He is an anthropologist who became interested in persons who go on pilgrimage or retreat. Spoke of this new state as LIMINALITY. It contains several dynamics:

--Separation: from the existing structures of our lives. This takes away our identity, security, and leaves us with anxiety.

--Anti-structure. When the old structures do not exist, alternative structures begin to develop. e.g. who is in charge. Maybe everyday you have to be in charge and here you will have a chance to see how it feels for others to be in charge. But in this anti-structure you don't know how to relate to the group, structures that empower are gone, charismatic gifts appear, and the leadership may rotate.

-- Potential. New possibilities can emerge for you, the group, and for the world you go back to.

COMMUNITAS - what develops out of the loss of old structure, the rebirth of a new one. In a sense he retreat is a "ritual context" that opens up new patterns of behavior. This means there are new possibilities for persons and groups. Greetings, relating, liturgy, sermons, and prayers can all be different in this place.

-- Safe Space for Persons. It is a sanctuary. A few words should characterize:

Egalitarian -- Real Persons -- No Structure -- New Discoveries -- Dangerous and Subversive. Elaborate on these words as descriptive of what can happen in a retreat setting.

--New Ways of Seeing g Illustrated in 9 dots. Group is told to connect all the dots without going over the same line twice or lifting the pen:

. . .

. . .

. . .

The trick is to go outside the lines by coming down the first three and then going through two dots outside and coming back to the left and then a complete diagonal. Churches and pastors are bound up in fear. They have to color with in the lines.

BRENDA'S STORY OF LA RIOTS She is a decorator but she was attending a meeting in which the leader spoke of what happened in the L. A. riots as a paradigm of how to look at any social problem. The questions are:

1. What happened -- the L. A. riots.
2. What caused it -- well the beating of a black youth.]
3. What motivated it -- angry, aggression.]
4. What assumptions did they have? -- that is, how did they look at it??
5. What is the primary way of thinking?

And, when you get to the end, you arrive at a place where the person who began the riot says "I am alone." Being alone and helpless makes persons do things to prove they "are."

So we build walls around ourselves for protection and these very walls not only isolate us and keep others out but they isolate and disempower others as well. None of us is safe until all of us are safe.

Spirituality is a journey about finding out ways to be together in community so that we do not feel so alone and powerless in our lives.

PASTOR'S PAIN -- Philip Keevile, a Welch evangelist from another denomination. Attended PTS in Pitt. Bashed by an ethics professor who thought he was crazy for not accepting the teacher's point of view. His line of thought: "I am where God wants me to be with an accepting church. But Presbytery and G. A. are extensions of my seminary experience and they keep bashing me with the threat that I am not right. I feel isolated, separate and alone. Deep down there is a fear of rejection and lack of security. I wish to suggest three things to you: 1. Find a friend; 2. Go to a spiritual director; 3. Join PFR where you will find help with your aloneness. (But later I also found out that he was abusing his son just like his father had abused him -- he felt laden with guilt and helpless to stop.)

PASTOR'S FORMATION --Ewing Brown is an associate, he realizes that he does not know how to help persons on the Spiritual Journey but desires to. He is 42 years old. For 5 years he has replicated the seminary but has come to the conclusion that this is "not me." I have been a phony for these 5 years. I do some disciplines then I neglect them. I begin the journey and I come to something that I resist. It is like something I can't get through. What keeps you back? Church is not structured for motivation: i.e. GA, Synod, Pres. and Session. Is that the real resistance? Probably not, he said.

PASTOR BATTERING A person said to me, "I have never seen a person go into ministry who did not have a passion." What I have seen is a group of hurting wounded men and women. WHAT HAPPENED? They met with rejection, persecution, and they settled for the status quo. Recall the minister from Valdosta who has become Street Smart. The result of this is a lack of energy and dullness of spirit.

DIVIDED GROUP OVER SEXUALITY I felt strange when I came back into the group. I knew the spirit was bad but I did not know why. Soon the disagreement appeared over human sexuality. I suggested that we sit together in silence for 30 minutes. I asked each to write down what the Lord said to them. I wrote: "These are my people. I am responsible for them. I will give them love enough they can face their differences." I recall that Mark Weaver said, "There is one Lord, One Faith, and One Baptism." Then the group had a voice.

THE SECRET Billie Poone said to me. "In the work of spiritual direction I find that most folk have a "secret" that blocks the flow of love to and from them." Persons must deal with their secrets to proceed. Some choose to deal with "secret" and many may ot deal with it and will tend to go away. Where are you and I in dealing with our secrets?

CALL -- A STRUGGLE Dick spoke to me of being bored with law and looking for a new venture. Good at trial work but is easily bored. At 30 he bolted and told his wife he wasn't interested in her. Realized he was the problem. Went to AA and found a very spiritual program. He got awakened to the spiritual world. 1. Went to pastors and not too helpful to him; 2. went for sp dir and found a little help but not much. 3. God seduced him with joy and peace -- really juicy relation for months. 4. Feels that God desired him because he has been in a period of dryness. 5. Began seeking -- read the Jacob story, went to the beach and sat on the sand reading and listening for God for hours. God came to him in a new way. Reflected on that experience. I had three directions for him: 1. write down what you wish to do and live with it. 2. Speak to a trusted friend about what God is saying to you. 3. Read the text and listen for God. See what you can discern. Make a commitment and live with it for a while.

DECLINE RATIONALIZED BY MONEY I was speaking in Canada a few months ago. They said that next year the United Church of Canada would raise less money next year than the year before. Since we have defended our member losses by asserting that we are raising more money, what will this do to our argument? When even the $ begin to shrink significantly there will be no more excuses or rationalizations. Then the DESPAIR will set in.

FALSE SURRENDER In the war with Iraq I recall a picture of Iraq's soldiers getting guns ready to fire but then they laid them down and surrendered to the CBS newsmen. Here is an ill. of the American scene. Thousands are looking for Something to surrender to. What credible loyalty do we need to offer persons the way of Christ?

VISIONS OF THE CHURCH 1. Magisterial -- the Constantinian church. 2. Maintanence -- to keep the institution in tact 3. Survival -- close ranks, defend, keep the building safe. Should be SERVICE. Someone said "we are a cross between the Senior Citizen's Center and the YMCA.

DEAD MEMBERSHIP An interim pastor went to a church in W. Pa. The record showed 250 members. But under examination he found that 50 were dead for several years. They had become residents of Grandview Cemetery. But know what "those in the cemetery are about as active as 50% of the remaining members."

People today are looking for Hoe, Help and a Home. A future, support and encouragement, a community of belonging.

UNITARIANS IN UCC In my lectures at Winnipeg there seemed to be a strong group of persons who were almost Unitarians. Who is Jesus? When I made a statement: "I believe in Jesus and I will die trusting in the God who revealed himself in Jesus Christ. A number of persons in the group broke into applause. (Old Peter is a Unitarian and all his questions stemmed from a desire to transform the Christian Paradigm. Or, to dismiss Christ and his Cross which is an offense to the rational man and woman.)

AN ANTOGONIST Bill spoke to me - gay I believe. On the last night of my talks in Winnipeg he followed me out. Others were talking with me and telling me of their appreciation. A long standing ovation for the work that I had done.

"I just want you to know that I am not one of those who appreciates what you had to say! You come for the U>S> and represent a different kind of spirituality. I have been evangelical and charismatic and I know about all that. I hope you can one day understand Canadian Spirituality, views on politics, and sexal orientation." (But I do understand, it is deep in the mind of the PCUSJ)

"But, he went on, spirituality is close to the heart of Canadians and we are very reluctant to speak about our spirituality."

I did not respond to him out of some sense of respect but I did wonder if this was too different from the Presbyterians with whom I work all the time. I feel for his struggle but he is really just like us.

GIFT OF THE SPIRIT "Unexpected." As a joke in Winnipeg I said, "My plane leaves at 5:40 and I need a taxi at 4:30." (laugh) As I was leaving, Karen Mather: "I'd like to take you to the airport. (joke) No, it would be a privilege. (How could I deny her the privilege.)

I figured this might be God's appointment 4:30 a.m. tell me. Tell me about yourself:

I was married to a ner-do-well. Couldn't hold a job, broke, prayed, Charismatic experience got me back into the church. I'd like to know about this experience.

Had no savings, new baby, out of work. Prayed --in two yers there was no difference. Ha food house, no part time work. "In the midst of my praying one day I began to speak in tongues -- peace, joy, praise!" Engulfed in Holy. Got back in the church and eventually told minister about what had happened to her. "Just an emotional experience, " he said. "Of Course it was emotional, and God was in it!" Now she is a minister and an advocate of gay and lesbian rights -- Daughter is a lesbian.

DISCERNMENT Going for a cold sandwich I met Louis and Betty. They asked me for supper, I did not wish to but it seemed to be this was God's appointment.) Began with Betty Arm --Tell me about yourself." She was a nurse, teacher, served in the church, felt a lot of conflict over the future: ordination Ph.D. to teach at the university. As I listened to her struggle I wondered aloud: "Have you ever thought about Spiritual Direction."

In your role in the church and as a teacher, it seems that you are doing lots of spiritual direction! Then ai told her of SFTS, Shalem., Duquesne. (I believe she had mentioned seeing a sp. dir. for discernment, "How did you find one?" Pray about it and then be on the look out for God sending you the guidance that you need, and the person that you need to meet."

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUTH Anthony asked me when I got the monetary, "What would yo say if you were to speak to a 100 youth, 1,000, 100,0000, 300,000? The pope spoke on "Jesus Christ, the Hope of the World." "If you have tie to read it . . . 1. The Good Shepherd, have life, abundant, be true to his life, he is the light of the world. Do not buy into false morality 2. Attend your conscience which is written into the structure of your being; 3. Strengthen your conscience; the truth of God, light of Christ,

BOOMER RETURN I had a woman in Winnetka Church. say, "Please don't say all the baby boomers are without faith. My son is going to be a minister." (Of course, they are not.) A second mother "What you have said is right. My so left the church, got into trouble with alcohol, drugs, divorce -- came to the end of himself." Said to her eventually, "Mother, tell me how to live and be sure to tell me everything Because I’ll know it if you don't...(I'll find out and will have to come back again.)

WHERE GO WHEN DIE??? Elderly man asked after my talk on the end of my life, "Where do we go when we die.?" Is not too interested in the heaven described din the book of Revelation with golden streets and crystal sea. I said, "To be with God." "When? 450 billion suns in the galaxy. Such a vast universe. (No doubt he had been reading ______ Hawkins. the parapelgic Englishman who wants to find the mind of God.

STREET WISE PREACHER Lee Listen of Valdosta had listened to me talk for 2 hours. The he said, "In my maturity I have gotten 'street smart' not wisdom maybe but "smart." I have learned to keep folk from chewing on my ass/ maybe even biting it off. When I came into the ministry I had passion. I struggled through the Vietnam era. I don't have passion anymore. I have learned how to survive. Don't intend to get run off or eater up. Context: old organ has gone out, a new one for $100,000 electronic or $300,000 pipe organ. Not getting into it. I see a major split coming. I asked, "No passion." "Oh, I have passion for the gospel." Bill Steel said, "But I didn't believe him when he said he had passion for the gospel." Bill wondered why he felt uncomfortable with a psychiatrist in the congregation. Psychiatrist said, "Why are you so passionate? I can't get involved with my patients. I keep everything steady. No highs, no lows. Everything is smooth"

LOOKING BACK AT 85 (Oldenburg) I listened to Doug talk o a group of students who were considering coming to CTS. He said, "Doug, use your head at this point in your life and try to discover what God has in mind for you."

"I took stock: what are my gifts; what do I want to say when I am 85 years old, what are my limitations, what do I enjoy most." And when I finished, I had a sense of what I should do with my life."

LESSONS FROM PAIN (Bob Ramey) I concluded at the end of my loss and suffering: 1. God is with you and God loves you and nothing shall separate us. 2. God is in everything and can cause those circumstances to work for our Good -eventually. 3. Now, I believe more fully than I ever did at the time I was passing through the pain. 4. I did not ask for it, I did not want it, but because I endured it, I am a better Christian because I endured it in faith." He found this out through Jane Robbins death. I got to the place Walter Brueggemann’s speaks of: "We must acknowledge that we stand before a "savage mystery". I had to receive ministry from others.

Bob has a schema for cross briefing and the difference in that and a burden. Burden is thrust upon us. Cross is chosen. A CROSS is voluntary, sacrificial, redemptive, daily.

"I'm not making my evaluation of this until God is through with it." Woman whose son was seriously injured in an auto accident.

COINCIDENCE Coincidence is just God's way of remaining anonymous; a hint of mystery so profound that if you met it head on, it would blow you away.

NEW DAY At the dawning of a new day, you can't do the same old things in the same old way when it is not working. "If you keep on doing what you have always done you will get more of what you have already got." Our children -- biological evangelism doesn't work; Presbytery is not working; Culture is secular and so is the church; upward mobility is not the same today; Old securities are perishing; Could it be god is destroying our old securities so that the new may be born. (May add my five points about Presence, Core, Worship, Laity, Mentors)

WITNESS AIRPORT Man at Atlanta airport, giving out tracts. Passed by him I went back to get one. His name was Lloyd Lyles. Why? Save the lost, he said. Results? Don't see much but the text had an address which is the Source of Light. Madison, Ga. 30650. In my hand I held the Gospel of john -- A tract. Awful reality of hell. A check made out to whosever will, to every believer is the promise of paid in full, drawn from the bank of heaven and singed -- The lord, Jesus Christ.

DEVELOPING A SPIRITUALITY PROGRAM. Read a copy of Roy Fairchild's inaugural address. See john Bailey: Knowledge of God. Lectures: John Sanford, Richard Foster, Morton Kelsey, Same Keen, Scott Peck, James Fowler, Parker Palmer.

FACE REALITY-- MARRIAGE DEAD. The woman who hosted me at Druid Hills came to me for a conversation. She said, "For weeks your name kept coming to me. So, i made an appointment" Her husband had been gone for 9 months. neither of them would file for divorce. She kept having hope. She said: 1) I do not wish to fail; 2) I do not wish to be alone; 3) I do not wish to rear a child without a father. How is your life different from that:? All these were characteristic of her life today. The next week he came with a petition that relieved him of responsibility if he dated. "Face reality and get on with your life."

NEED FOR INVITATION Spoke to Rindy Taylor about the retreat she attended. Moved to ask her help in spirituality in 92. Recalled her story about the spirit in the church retreat. "I would like to talk to you. Why not make an appointment and come by some time." "Thank you -great feeling for asking. I needed the motivation." I had a sense that she needed some direction in her life. She said, 'I am a seeker, I am really seeking." But she never came by; she seemed quite vague about the track.

TRANSLATOR OF WORD OF GOD. "There has to be something disturbing about translating the word of God." ?Did the committee pray that translated the NRSV"" We were not weary, sometimes felt pious, but we were conditioned by culture with bumper stickers that read, "I'd rather be fishing." Quite awesome to stand on the shoulders of William Tyndale, KJV, RSV and others -- 51 translations since 1946. We are the recipients of their labors." Gene Tucker, translator of the NRSV.

NO GOSPEL HERE. "THIS IS JUST A LITTLE a.m. RADIO, I CAN'T GET NO GOSPEL IN THIS BUILDING." Custodian who cleans Bishop’s hall with an ear plug in her ear. Her name is Helen Busby. Gene Tucker, professor, and dead at Candler. "Helen, are you listening to Gospel music on your radio?" "No.".......(above). I wonder if people in my seminary or your congregation can hear the gospel there.

WRAPPED IN PRAYER. A large lady with a powerful presence said, "I had been wrapped in prayer. She awoke at 3:30 for weeks to pray for me. That is the time I go to the bathroom to pee. Talk -- Two types of conversion. she asked, "Why....." Because I believe it is true." She: "I was nurtured until I was 48 years old and I have never met a nurtured convert who knew they were saved." Wesley; "You may know, it is your privilege to know that you have been saved."

NEVER BEEN TO CHURCH Met with an afternoon group -- Jan Gerier. She said, "I miss much of what you are saying. I have been in the church only a few months. Had not been to church in all her 30 years of life. "How did you get here?" Husband, a Christian, prayed for me. Daughter said, "Mom, Go to Church with us." Decided to make a will. Read the form, "What do you wish to do with your body, earthly goods. Threw her into depression. Her husband said, "I think church should help you." Mary, the clergy woman spoke on John 4 "I felt the sermon was to me. My name. Offered life with the water. joined the church. When she put her hands on my head -- said "Baptized." I cannot put into words -- maybe you are not supposed to put it into words." "I feel like an infant. I don't understand your words and concepts." You wouldn't ask your 2 year old to read. She had never been to church because her parents told her that church only wants your money. She desperately needed the church but was blocked out by the images from her parents."

HARD WITNESS. I work with engineers. They are scientific, empirical. Have no place for religion. Why not take a scientific approach: 1. Ash them to read Mark with Adult mind. If he reveals God -- what does he say to you. 2. Invite them to pray. Begin an experiment in prayer for 7 days. (Connect with the Marxists who said, "I felt that I owed it to intellectual integrity to at least read the Bible and not accept it is a class book to keep the poor in subject." When I read it, God spoke to me and broke down my doubts")

DO YOU OWN OR RENT -- Betty's daughter went to a church on the Potomac. A very affluent suburb of Washington D.C. Went to the social hour. A lady asked, "Do you own or rent?" We rent. You rent? Ooooh, and she turned up her nose at the thought of it. The young couple never returned. And they remembered the encounter.

GIFT IS NOT A GIFT -when it is merely a value, when it is given with a grudging spirit, when a reward is expected; when it expresses desire for human approval; when it hides a lie, when it has a selfish motive --- Recall Jacob's gift of pottage,

PROSPECT LIST Foster Edwards Picked up on Gallup -- All know at least 7-10 persons who are not identified with a church. In the first 5 minutes of session of 9 members they listed 167 persons by name, in contact with, 3 short of the total membership of the church. Prospect list: pray for, invite to worship, have a meal with us, --- they were to become accountable once each month for these persons. These were the "most obvious and the most neglected." People we know whom we see but don't "see" every week. We think they are already in the church and have no possibility.

SEE OURSELVES. A tribe in New Guinea visited by anthropologist. Tribe had not seen themselves. Visitors let them see their own faces with mirrors. The anthropologists filmed their actions, worship. Showed them pictures of themselves and the reflection blew their minds. In a year they came back to the village to see how this self-awareness had affected their lives. All the old people remained. Young had gone off to town. They had sold the sacred drums to get money to get a bicycle to town. does it mean to sell the sacred drums?

READ THE BIBLE I met Stewart on the way to Syracuse. He was from Columbia S.C. A Lawyer, graduate of Cornell. MBA from Harvard. (I think all Harvard grads want you to know, I would.) Asked him his story. He had been in corporate law and had made a change. Now in investments, cheap companies. Referred to a spiritual change. I asked about that. When he was leaving corporate law, he had 6-7 months before he would take his new job in Boston. He had time alone, decided to read the Bible. Read most of the OT. But he read the NT twice. He read it with the eyes of a lawyer, MBA from Harvard. He said, "It changed my life." What do you want from the church, I wondered. "I want something to help me grow in my faith." Nurtured by a men's group, good preaching.

PLURALISTIC PRAYING. David was asked to pray at a Jewish service. How shall I pray? "With integrity" said the Rabbi. You must be faithful to your tradition. He helped sponsor a community Thanksgiving Service. More national than Christian. They had Jewish, a Protestant, Muslim and Roman Catholics. But each had a part and each sought to speak with integrity from his own tradition. Must be this way!!!

GOD TOOK ME TO PEE. A four year old at the church during the week wit his mother. He had to go to the rest room. Minister took him. The next day his mother said to the minister "Last night when my husband got home our son said, "Guess what dad! God took me to the rest room today."

GOD'S WILL "Shift the perspective." Walter Albritton, one of the best men in his church said, "I have stopped trying to find God’s will and I have assumed I was in it! If he has other plans for me, he can let me know.

Walter said, "I spent a long time trying to be a Christian. One day I said, "I am a Christian."

CHALLENGE TO THE PROCESS -- Barbara wrote me about the small group in which she participated: "Ben where is Jesus Christ in all of this? What you said tonight is great. Wonderful. Right on. Until you put up the chart on it doesn't matter how you got here, just enjoy the journey. Ben, where is "here"? For Mary its the pantheistic god of nature. for Jeanne, its the God of Psychotherapy. For Jim, he is finally a Jew and not a Christian. Help them, to encounter the radiant living reigning Lord, Jesus Christ.

The Lord has given me a great burden for the lost sheep of Israel -- those in the churches who meet and speak in his name but have not yielded to him as their Lord and Savior. They must yield to Him, to escape eternal damnation. The process of preparation for conversion may take many years and be very gradual. The act of yielding your life to the Lord Jesus happens at a point in time, the process of being sanctified takes the rest of your life. (I do not believe that I was as far off as she thinks but I am reminded that she has a very good point and we must face the fact of our surrender to Jesus Christ.)

IMAGINATION. "Imagination is the capacity to entertain images of reality other than those presently at hand." The minister must "retextualize the imagination of the baptized." Walter Brueggemann. In retextualizing Walter illustrates with therapy. He says, "Therapy does its work bit by bit by bit. We get little insights and we change. As we appropriate it as we go along. (This is also the way that conversion takes place.)

COLOGNE Guy in El Paso asked, "May I ask you a question." Yes, but I won't know the answer. "What cologne do you use?" English Leather, cheap. He was turned off. "Ever think of using a designer brand. No. "What does your wife use?" Don't know. He turned and walked away. Is acceptance a matter of smell? Do you know your smells?

MODEST WITNESS I met two stewardesses on the plane to El Paso. The first was a Presbyterian. I said that I was a Presbyterian also. The other said, "I tried to take classes at Utah State, but I could only get stuff on Mormonism. What are you? R. C. "At the core of all religious life is the reality of a hunger for and a relation with God. Ever in San Francisco, I'll write Beth Liebert about you. She is a nun who will be of help to you. -- Was this evangelism?

CHAPEL HILL HARVESTER. The arch bishop from Nigeria preached. He warmed up the crowd. Had the crowd repeat the text...fix 1 word, 1 idea in the mind Then he did a litany in the midst of the sermon. Repetition of the core of the sermon. Pastor to walk with him. No problem. Show how you walk together. Words contained; mid-way; go over. Sermon was an effort to rescue Earl Paul.

In the storm ask: (if the devil can distract you, he can direct you)

1. Why has the wind come --- midway through.
2. Distracts you so you will lose sight of where you are going.
3. Gives you choice to turn back. Faith has no backward steps. Forward is the call.
4. So that you will think you have missed God (lost God in the storm) "When you are passing through trouble, go ahead."
5. So you pay no price. (No crown) No price is too much.

CHAPEL HILL STORY Thirty years ago Earl was with Ch of God. Ben in church and ministry his whole life. Furman, Candler. Hemphill Avenue before Paul Walker. Went to Arizona and had a dream to come back and restore hurting people. Matt. 9:3. Send laborers. Church is the BOC, various experiences. Don and Earl began at a5 points with 30 to 35 persons. Grew but not very fast. 20 years ago Alpha, XIAN Rock band began to reach 1,000 youth. Moved into a tent. K Center built on a new piece of ground. Kingdom is in people and is to exert influence. Structure. Form can become more important than the people. Keep a form but he opens to the H> S> Freedom to worship and praise. Use of the body in worship. To Paulk What would you say to the mainline, Pres. Church. "Find out where the walls are and I'd try to remove them. Wherever there is a wall, take it down."

FRANKS FIVE POINTS 1. Worship regularly, 2. Serve Eagerly, 3. Give generously, 4. Live worthily, 5. Invite a friend. Tremendous value in repeating this each Sunday as a way of telling who the church is and what it intends to do. Us as an illustration in New Book.

WOMAN'S VISION Matt McGowan was pastor of a church in Richmond, Va. Had a woman in the hospital whom he visited. She said that she had had a vision and the angels of God had been singing to her. He began to help her with the vision. "You know, you have had a fever of a 105 and it may be that you have been hallucinating." She said, "Preacher, shut your damn mouth. I am the one who had the vision. I heard the angels sing and not you, and besides you were not even here." Here was a woman who was unwilling to sacrifice her experience of God to the cynicism and skepticism of the minister.

PREACHER/BELIEVER. In Listening to Nibs Stroop, he believes in 1. the power of the gospel; 2. the present action of God in the world. "When pressed by human need, you either believe, burn out, or harden your soul."

KOINOIA Is born of the Spirit through a shared life and a shared task. (Pat Alexander) This is the model for the Spiritual Enrichment week. The task -- call; the life -- one in community.

THE INVITATION John Furman interviewed all the Thos. Scholars and to a person each felt embarrassed. Invitation baggage: 1. not saw-dust trail revival, 2. not hot gospel fundies, 3. Not manipulation of emotions. "It made me feel uncomfortable -- I know the new order of worship contains it but I do not know how to do it." Our image is that we preach to believers, the baptized. A climate of developmental expectation!

Issues: image, type of invitation, -- in the faith or into the faith; theology of decision, follow up of a decision.

WORSHIP A place where we regularly redesign our lives.

METAPHOR OF LIFE Skip Lunsford was an instructor in a prison; thy all wore gray uniforms, in a gray prison. Window had bars over it, barbed wire on the wall, gray N. C. hills. Looked and realized it was a reflection of his life. Saw out of the window an image walking around the baseball field reading a Red Book, the Bible. This is what is missing in my life, the Word of God. I need a word from God! This parable that was played out before his eyes became the agent of transformation for him so that it mediated the word of God to him and subverted his life style. "God got in." Notice, your life, it is happening to you and

God may be doing something special in your life.

SEXUAL GUIDELINES:

1. Appreciate sex as a gift of God
2. Appreciate values and respect each other's bodies.
3. Begin with sexual experience you feel comfortable with.
4. Try new things.
5. Make sex a sacred trust.
6. Communicate feelings, needs, desires, and what is most pleasing to you.
7. Consider both yours and your mates pleasures.
8. Whatever is mutually agreed upon is good.
9. Sex is for pleasure and procreation.
10. Good sex is a strong glue to bond two persons together.
11. Don't ever use sex as a weapon in battle.
12. Don't demand or withhold sex, try understanding.
13. Don't make fun or humiliate your partner.
14. Be creative in sex to save it from becoming monotonous.

NORMAL FAMILLY. I met this female minister in Des Moines. She had a son named John Paul and both she and her husband were ministers. She tried telling him that he had a normal life. "What do you mean normal --- I have a sister in a mental institution; a one-legged aunt who lives with us in my house, and not one but two parents who are pastors. How can you call that normal?

CHURCH A fellow said, there are two things wrong with the church: Ignorance and apathy. And he asked another church member what he thought and she said, "I don't know and I don't care. Dick Armstrong

Wits End. (Andrew Purvis) He is from Scotland. He went to SS at 5 and sang I'm Happy and this left him cold and not belonging. Never went back. His parents were from the working class, hair dresser and his dad was a high school drop out. At 21 he said to his mother, "My life is boring and empty." She said, "Why don't you do to church?" Went to UMC found a girl and this was a turning point in his life. Went to New College, Edinburgh, He was too radical, like they were from the dark ages. He was too radical for the church of Scotland. He had a good mentor who would not give up on him. Went for a Ph. D. at Edinburgh, then to the US and served as an associate for a year. In 1983 he was called to PTS to teach Pastoral Theology and Spirituality. Before he had served in a small church that was the worst in the Pitt. Pres., the basement of the church. He was in despair and got in touch with the Church of the savior. They put him in touch with Bob Linthicum at Gross Point Woods -- He said "Focus on Christ." He began to find his soul.

NEW CHURCH DEVELOPMENT

1. Try pastors who are unemployed -give skills for the job.
2. Start 3 churches at once and use retired pastors, seminary students,
3. Redevelopment, use an old building and get a new start with a new people.
4. Racial ethnic dimension of NCD
5. Options for buildings -- schools, funeral homes.
6. Gather with the VIM and equip youth like Rob Frost.

BEATEN BY LIFE AND CHURCH Wayne Hanson West coast, at the end of a retreat he began "I came out of seminary with a vision, had drams for my ministry but I got beaten down. After a while I gave up and I never came back." With tears he said, "I can’t say any more about it."

VISIONS AND REVELATIONS At age 7 or 8 Lois Caldwell was enwrapped in the Presence. Suppressed this experience in her teens and became a person nobody understood. In her college years her professor said, "You have what you need.; He asked about the Presence and she answered about the reality of the Spirit within.; He said, "That's SS, your imagination." One night she read the scripture, "My greatest joy is to see my children walk in the truth." III John. Christ came into the room, flooded the room with light. She was shocked, bathed, cleansed, and He blew his breath on me. In a Bible study the next day she told a quiet little lady. She stopped her in the middle of the report, "O, are you interested." Yes and your heart burned as she told my story."

MISSION TO THE POOR Annette Day went to the theatre on Dec. 9, 1986. She saw the PEOPLE OF THE BRICK at the Academy Theatre. It was 4 homeless persons who helped write and then performed in the play. She went home and could not sleep. She felt she could help 4 persons in the play get into an Apartment. After they acted they went back on the street. She had $1,000 to her name and she rented an apt. for one person. It began to work in her mind and she formed a place the homeless could come and get a box with a washrag, a towel, a fork and a knife -- A HOME KIT. Now she has dispensed 100's of these. Something in this that sounds like what Jesus would do. She spends all day on Sat. She gives from $25 to $450 dollars. They must meet certain conditions, she follows up. She said what this means for me is that I became a Christian I was converted. She runs ads "Good News for Atlanta's homeless." She lists the shelters. Do you see what a vision will do to awaken a person for the work of Christ? The way Annette put it, "I finally opened up and allowed myself to be touched. I was sad, embittered, and angry. Left the church in college, marriage for 6 years, he was abusive and I got pregnant. Lindesay was from. Became an alcoholic and hung out at bars with whoever would take me home. Peace joy and riches that I never dreamed of . Old Tom Sheffield was living in cat holes in the shadow of the church and she said, we must not fail to see those who are at the door of the church. Before going to the play I was full of self-pity.

CALL/DOUBT Miki Vanderbilt called last night. She said, "Tell me again that I have been called by God." The church where she wanted to go called to say that they had decided not to call her.; This brought back a painful history of rejection.

TWELVE STEPS I asked Ben Gooding about Sam Shoemaker. He said that Sam had said, "Don't give me any credit for the 12 steps. They were inspired by God through Bill Wilson. They are the best way of awakening and renewal that I know of. SAM SHOEMAKER I asked Ben Gooding the secre of Sam: Its all in his credo, I Stand by the Door. 2. His language was that of the man on the street: Put thehay so that both the giraffes and jack asses can get to it. 3. Focus on the church come for power to go out and serve.

EVANGELISM -- TOUCH ISSUES 1. dogma, prepositional evangelism; d2. historical present to us today through the story. 3. Search for meaning; 4. Cross-cultural and world wide evangelism in a pluralistic age. Draw a diagram: God/Self through Time, in Community, within a Context, toward a Destiny. Yo-Yo approach to evangelism. 1. Don't like it; Can't do it; don't with to pay for it. (Up and Down approach).

SECOND GENERATION SINS Three sins of the second generation. 1. familiarity -- knows too well. 2. formalism -- loss of fist hand experience. 3. accommodation -- to be acculturated, secular with a loss of radical dedication. Perhaps these ear mark our sins. __

CALL "It is a ministry given to you. You cannot take it unto yourself. No one cane take it from you. Remember it is your gift from God." To David Moessner from J. I. McCord.

The question asked a minister of Jesus Christ. An awesome commitment none cold fulfill unless enabled by God.

LOSE YOURSELF When Hal Edwards came to Christian Laity of Chricago he was in a warehouse full of seasoning. We sell to McDonalds, Domino Pizza, and Captain D's. We provide the seasoning they have their own label. "I want CLC to be like the products of Griffith, to lose itself in the city of Chicago." This is what I want for the church, to lose itself in the service of Christ.

MARK 2 A short workshop on the passage. I. View of the Bible: story, events, God present in the text; II. Ways into the Scripture. INTJ or ENFP etc. III. THINKING Application to the passage: context, what is about, why recalled and told, how does it speak to us. FEELING Picture events, picture yourself in events, picture setting (1), picture Christ present FEELING Paralytic, each other character, Christ, you now, what does this leave you in APOPHATIC "intuitive" the knowledge Drop feeling, drop image, drop reason and thinking, engage the silence. IV. DIALOGUE WITH CHRIST (left alone with Christ.) V. My story at St. Phillips.

PUBLIC PAIN Friends were telling us that when persons visit them in D. C. they let them share in the public healing. In some sense we must give voice to pain. They say that when friends visit they take them to the Vietnam Warm Memorial. Both they and others express their grief, pain in a public way. The memorial provides an opportunity for healing in a corporate way.

SYMBOL OF GRIEF A multicolored stole made by the loom of a peasant in Guatemala. So that when I kneel in prayer Keith Hosey spread the stole over them and then said that all the people, including the priest, had been killed by the government. As I knelt, I felt the weight of my part in their death. A broken sinful world that stands and falls together.

DON'T FEEL GUILTY Clyde Wiley told of a lady who said, "I'm afraid you're not preaching the gospel...." So she was going to leave the church. "Why?" No gospel. "Because you don't make me feel guilty." As a Baptist, I was always able to feel guilty ...as a little girl I felt guilty at Day school. Clyde gave thanks that he did not make her feel guilty.

CALL HELPED BY CHILD Laura took a few courses and kept the notion of her call quiet. Her daughter said, "Mother, someone told me you were going to become a minister." "You know I've been going to seminary and you have even helped me with the work." "I know mother but I really didn't think it was going to mean anything."

ORDINATION COMMISSION The minister said to the person being ordained, "Visit the people; when you don't go, God doesn't come." Layman asked, "Do you feel that powerful." No; but God can be that powerful.

FREEDOM "I've gained a freedom that I'm just now getting used to." Four years ago he forgave a family that had beaten him when he was a bed wetter. His parents died in infancy, he passed from foster home to foster home. He was a black man who forgave his enemy. He is not a preacher at Charlotte who came to the FDW training.

EVANGELISM DEFINITION A black lady at ITC said, "Evangelism is to expand outward so we can make the world smaller." They gave me a black welcome.

HOLY PLACE Mark Bryan has a Hebrew prayer shawl with tassels like Jesus probably wore. He said, "You can pull it over your head to seal out the world and create a holy space, the place where you meet God." Creating sacred space is the business of the church.

CONVERSION CHANGE Jackie Lewis wondered if conversion really did cancel out all the past, make us a whole new person to start over. I say, "An illusion. We take the self we've formed into the conversion." (P. J. Hogue -- "Id went to a psychiatrist and they could not cure me.)

SHORTEN WORSHIP Billy Wade's son went to the session and asked them to cut worship to 30 minutes. They asked, "Why?" He said, "Because my mother says that after 30 minutes I drive her crazy and I think it would be nice for my mother."

SIGN OF "AVIS" Some of us were born under the sign of Avis, we try harder."

MISTAKEN GIFT Walter and Mary sent us a package that turned out to be a Waterford decanter. Nan was aglow with gratitude. Later a letter came from Mary telling us to hold it for them until they returned to save on duty. Then the word got back to them and they brought Nan a decanter. Now what am I to do but buy the glasses that go with the decanter.?"? And should I send Walter the bill?

DESERT FATHERS AND MONASTICS (notes from Roberta Bondi) 1. Constantine made it profitable to be a Christian. Before it had been costly. 2. Give up life in the world to "Love God and the Neighbor." Can't make dollars, power etc. take care of family but have to give up the world. 3. Monastics consulted with by

emperors, kings, peasants. (They had nothing to lose, they had given up everything already) 4. "Spirituality is not something you strive for it is lived.;" "Spiritual life does not consist of a special kind of feeling, language, image etc. but of living in the world."

RETREAT FOR THREE MONTHS ? Chris Zorn said to me, "You should go on a 3 month retreat to the Mohave Desert. You would probably come back enlightened. A man of wisdom." If you can't go for 10 years, go for three months. "Too late for me to go for 10 years." C: "Maybe you could ask him to condense it to 3 months." B: "Wonder if I could handle the high voltage." (I wonder if God may have been sending me a message l. . I have had very little encouragement inside the last two or three months. I figure this is part of the journey.

JOY OF EVANGELISM Bryant Kirkland said there are 4 joys of evangelism: o Joy of talking about the Good news of God in Christ JOY of participating in the mystical BOC JOY of celebrating the new life received from Christ; JOY of risk an adventure of following the Christ.

BRYANT KIRKLAND Went to 5th Ave timid and as a coward; at 55 he decided to raise the ante and grow up. At 60 he thought he had 5 years more to serve; at 65 he took it year by year; and from 67 to 72 the last 5 years the church grew 25% because he decided he did not care what folk thought and said and so he just told them the truth. wonders why he did not move into this courage earlier. Something about age that gives courage because what folks think doesn't really matter. You are more aware of your one audience.

KINGDOM EXPERIENCE I went to the "touch of Atlanta" like a festival of Booths or Tabernacles; Down on Peachtree back of the ATT building. All ages, races, sexes, came to eat, drink, fellowship and listen to music. The universal experiences. As I stood there clapping, rocking, and shouting ... I thought here is the Kingdom. In some way the dance of humanity may be the door to the kingdom of God.

HOMOSEXUAL DISCUSSION AT CTS Here are some random thoughts that were expressed. Jesus never condemned it. Role in the history of the church. Do not set in the context of Christian and non Christian.

Professor Stroup's Confusion: 1. not clear there are things more or less sinful; 2. questions of ordination to be made on a case by case basis.

From the gay person:

1. a matter of integrity to be who they are;
2. grief that results from being open
3. choose to be or do you lie about it 00 not an easy choice, complex.
4. activity of the H. S. what does it mean for me to be in the church and feel called to minister when I cannot be ordained." Brian: not pathological, genetic issues....what does it mean to be in covenant. A fellow from the Metropolitan Church (11 years gay community "My task is hard. I minister to homosexuals both mine and yours (meaning mainline churches).

CONFLICT OF FEELINGS Julie Moss had a 23 year old daughter. Her daughter had never spoken, she was not normal, a mentally retarded child. Tom preached Grace, love, acceptance and a merciful God. But I felt the clash of love and justice. How could this loving, Accepting God create a less than human specimen. The theodicy issue came close in the person of Julie Moss. Two forces brought face to face with each other.

STRANGER VISITS Nan I asked do you know a Cecilia Cantrell? No. Why did you make an apt. with her. You are to screen, not over load me with unknown folks. My calendar already looks like the busy Dr.'s appointment book. epidemic of callers. At 4:30 she came in 5'4" hair up in a smart look. She said, "I read your book (Ad inPrayer) Began to talk, rapid, spitfire style, neurotic. .

Birmingham, 2. Church of Christ, strict fold, fundamental, husband for a minister, campus work, jealous, divorce, atheist for 20 years. Now at GA State. Head of nursing. Recent came back to God. Lady gave me a copy of your book. In this book I learned to pray, call anew on God, still in church of Christ, went to the bible and I've been "Listening to God !" You said, "Whatever you desire . . . I prayed for a family for me and my daughter. Oliver came and now he is gone. I prayed for a fellowship with others and I've got that. I adopted a Korean daughter 17 years ago, she is rebellious and 3 weeks ago she moved out with her friends. "Do you believe what you wrote. . . (I feel God has let me down, kidded me...like he said, "See what I can do, now give it all up

GOD IN THE ATTIC Margie Wright was a battered child. Went up in the attic to die, wanted to die. Found a Bible and read it. John was the place it fell open. Found someone who could love me and accept me. I'm not O.k. yet but I'm accepted. Jesus became father and mother to me. I hid the Bible and read it day after day. (at 4r0 her husband left her; now she is a minister in a small community in Idaho and the people she reaches do not come to church before; sometimes feels like leaving the church and joining the unchurched, perhaps Christ is there more than he is in some of these churches. Another attic in which to find God

AWAKENED FAITH Ken Woodin was nurture din the church on the love of Jesus and he wanted to learn more about him. Had 3 years in the youth work. No change. At the end of himself he went to Young Life. The approach awakened him to love

TALK WITH GOD Diane Cramer was 9 when her dad left. Mother was suicidal and her only confidante was God. She began talking to Him as a heavenly Father. Not able to tell anyone else but God. She talked with God daily, even hourly and this was the source of her strength and the way she survived.

CROSS CULTURAL EVANGELISM (YOUTH) Ken Winter was called to the Village Church. He was minister to you but did not know much about it. He worked at it for 3 years and was disillusioned because there was no change in 3 years. Went to Young Life training. Found 6 things: 1. he was a missionary to a foreign culture; 2. had to learn the language, rituals, and culture, 3. felt helpless, let them help 4. hang out with the kinds to gain credibility; 5. Earn the right to speak of Jesus 6. Enlist youth to lead and help. 7. Train part-time workers: show them how to do what I did not know how to do; see me awkward, and add success because it went on after I was gone. Here is what the mainline church must do with the boomer generation. A perfect plan with the right dynamics if we intend to reach those outside our pail.

DISCERN A MINISTRY (CLIMATE OF THE CHURCH) Robin Gantz left 1st UMC for the PCUSA ordination. She went to several churches -- Mt. Vernon, I saw Asa as another ambitious politician who lacked the Spirit. At 1st Roswell I saw in Cy Mallard a man who could care for me, be sensitive, and Real. He had lots of pressures but he made an 11:00 apt before he went out of town. Session welcomed me. He had stress of a funeral etc but saw me. He took 5 or 120 minutes to be a pastor to me then he got down to business.

EVANGELISM OF JOHN MOSER As a child his parents took him to SS. His SS teacher knew his name and knew he was John's and Millie's boy He went to youth group as a young person; he met a pretty girl at the youth meeting, and they preached the gospel and gave an invitation, he responded. He told his dad about the warm reception by youth and joined the church from the Disciples of Christ. As an adult he grew in God’s love and served him. He faced death 2 or 3 times and survived. Through it all he experienced the joy of life. At all these stages he was in the process of evangelization.

STORIES THAT ENERGISE Carl Dudley said there are stories that energize the life of a church. Found these in social ministry. Surveyed 40 churches asking them what energized them for social ministry: 1/3 a bible text; 1/2 Denominational Statement and 1/3 got energy from theological statements. He was searching in all these congregations their stories: 1. Stores of persons who made a great courageous sacrifice. 2. Stores of crises in the life of the church 3. Stories of generation of immigrants 4. Stories of religious heritage 5. Stories of organization and how it developed. At the center of this research was the story.

WHAT IS IMPORTANT Tommy Brown's father. He told about having a fire on the mission field. Or got busy with the work like swat the fly campaign, cull the smoke in the kitchen, redesign the room. Sent them out to the church with a carpenter. Years later he said, "I heard a voice behind me judging and reprimanding me, "O, Frank, first the people. "In my enthusiasm for the structure of the church, I forgot the people." This is what Frank Brown said --People are our priority."

THREE P'S OF BUREAUCRACY Paper, Process, Precedent.

In one denomination office there were 1,358,243 copies madeduring one year ---copied, folded, colored. Process: Watchword for the bureaucrat. "Now what did you really do?" 3. Precedent: how have we done it before. Miss out on the mission if we get bogged down with these 3 P's.

COMFORT FOR PASTOR Dr. Vernon Broyles told me of visiting Judge Jack Ethridge who was dying with cancer. Waited for him in the yard. Ralph McGill, editor of the Atlanta Journal and Constitution, came out crying like a baby. "I went in to comfort him and I came out comforted." Mc Gill then wrote in his weekly column about Judge Ethridge who helped him. Ralph decided to go back to All Saints Episcopal where he taught SS and had been bitter over the race issue and the church's reluctance.

ISSUES IN EVANGELISM 1. Church growth at the expense of discipleship 2. Experience of God in the clergy – need to get comfortable, capable, competent with the presence of God. 3. Interface of the non-denominational, neo charismatic with the mainline: judgment of nondenominational interface. 4. The Children's return – when they come back to church will we be boring or irrelevant?

CAN YOU SPEAK OF GOD A layman in Pittsburgh asked me if I could speak to a person who was a complete stranger. Yes. I asked him to please stand up with me. I asked: "Pardon, could I tell you something very important to me." Christ is Lord for me and I believe for you, too.

SHORT SEMINAR ON WITNESS: Begin with the man who asked, "Can you witness to a stranger?" Then illustrate the fears that most of us have. 1. Anxiety over witnessing -- name the fears, resistance, and expose the problem. 2. Basic Skills in Friendmaking for God – Listening, Speaking, and Doing" Listen through gospel filters, speak story of God’s love and Serve the needs of your hearers. 3. Options beyond thihs are : feedback from the encounter, request more data, and state how you identify or fail to identify with the persons speaking 4. In and interview ask: a. In what way has God worked in your life b. What is God doing now? c. As you think, what sense of call do you have?

SUSPICION (Sue Butcher told this story to her pastor) A lady in Chicago took the ferry across lake Michigan. She was reading an Agatha Christi novel and laid her snicker bar and coat in the seat across from her. She began reading. A man sat down. She felt guilty that she had not spoken to him. She looked up and he was tearing the paper from the candy bar. He laid it down. She began to fume about his eating her candy bar. So she reached across and picked up the snicker bar that he had laid down and took a bite. She laid it back on the seat; he takes the candy bar and eats the remainder. Then, he goes for a sandwich and sat down and ate 1/2 of it. He laid it on the seat beside him. She got rather bold and reached over and took the sandwich and ate a bite. They both look at each other. The whistle sounds and both disembark. Then she opened her purse and there was here candy bar. Assumptions don’t work very well.

ISOLATION There was a cartoon character created by Jules Feiffer. A funny little character that was in a shell, inside a wall, inside a fort, inside a cave "Where I am safe from you." Inside a shell? Inside a wall? Inside a fort? Inside a cave? The last frame said, "But if you really cared you'd find me." Here was a soul who longed to be touched.

GOD IS NEAR I met a man in Richmond Conference who said, "I have always known God was with me, but I have not always been near to God." Can you recall times when your life was going away from God and you stopped and turned to God so that you were aware of God?" (I think this is the question of repentance. Yes. Many Times. My belief is that nurtured persons can recall when they have returned to God.

IGNORANT OF THE BIBLE Peggy Gibson was in an unhappy marriage. It was cold. She wanted to find God but felt very ignorant of the Bible. She would not go to Sunday School because she was embarrassed about how little she knew. In the church they said words like Jacob, sin, reconciliation, which she figured everyone knew but they made her feel like an outsider. Her aunt played the organ at First Church and she kept saying you ought to get those children in SS. But not one time did she ever speak to her of Christ and the love of God for her.

A MIRACLE FOR THE PCUSA SPIRITUALILTY I am increasingly losing hope for our church. The PC may die. I think that nothing short of a miracle can save us as a denomination. What you do in the work of Christian Spirituality cannot manipulate God but it can put us in a place to receive the miracle. Pete Hendricks said this to me in the early days of my teaching evangelism at CTS.

OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE Shirley McCain from Duncan Oklahoma told me that when Bill Long was her pastor she lay down to rest, but that she was suspended for 2 and a half hours. He told her he had a ministry for her. She felt absorbed in the Presence and after 2 ¬Ω hours the presence dropped her on the bed which sagged. She painted all day and at the end was bone tired. She stretched out and was supported by God and God seemed to pray through her. God took her into an "inner space" and opened to her the future of her life. It seemed to close and then it opened again. Her son was killed by the Dixie Mafia and somehow she survived.

CHURCH GROWTH Betty Stribbling was in Iowa City, Texas when I first met her. She was leader of a church leader that quadrupled in 5 years. She had a strong relation with her father. He was much in control. In San Antonio she went to church as a stranger and volunteered to drive the youth to Mo Ranch. Felt so alienated but she could relate to the teens, singles, and divorcees. She began to work with all these people and then decided to go into the ministry when two women asked her, "When are you going to seminary?"

REJECTION -- FEELINGS HURT -- AWAKENING Janet was a middle child. When her sister was born she was 6 years old and felt angry. I acted out my feelings and parents didn't know what to do. My parents rejected me. I sealed off my feelings because it hurt too badly to ask and be rejected. Haven't let myself feel since. Last year a fellow rejected me. Then a church she was serving rejected her. I spoke to her, “I care about the pain that you are feeling. I'm not afraid of your darkness, pain or your encounter with the void. If you need me, I'll walk with you into the darkness. You can talk if you want to.”

She said, "When I was a child I had this secret castle I could go to, close it to everyone and feel safe and isolated. But I felt terribly alone.”

One day she waited after class to talk a few minutes. "Last night my room mate read the story of the Transfiguration. An image came to me, picture of the mountain, clouds, thunder and 6 days of prayer. I felt like one of the disciples. The word said, "come to me" and repeatedly I heard "listen". He said, "I love you; I love you." I was swept with emotion. I began to cry.

When the experience was finished, I said OK to the Lord. I began to cry. Then, I had a vision of Jesus. He looked like Solomon’s Head of Christ and he took me down a long path and we came to the castle within -- my hiding place. He gave me a candle, and opened the door, and went in. There was a fire in the fire place. He washed my feet, gave me slippers and through out the water. He said my name "You wash others like I have washed you." He led me to the couch and rubbed my back. Still is doing this for me. I wanted him to go on rubbing my back and making me feel his love and nearness.

FACING LIFE FUTURE I met Carol Labow at First Presbyterian Church. She had two saying that she liked and thought maybe they would help me.

"Everything is goin’ to be alright." (Elias Harge, an African American minister gave it to here)

"Don't make it more than it is." African American professor at ITC when she was fretting over a paper.

PRESBYTERIAN ETHOS PRESBYTERIAN. EVANGELISM I met Mike Bell on the plane from NY. He was 38 years old, clean cut, seasoned traveler --could tell by the way he dropped his brief case and slammed his hand up in the overhead. He sat down and we talked about lots of things before we go to religion. He works for a health care company that offers in home treatment. And he travels often. Married and has 4 children and his wife stays home and takes care of the children. We talked about my work. Teacher. Professor. Preacher travels with Presbyterians.

We have three churches in Tewkesbury, N. J. Episcopal, Presbyterian, and Assembly of God. The first two are pretty standard. In fact I visited both of them and neither wanted me as a member -- that was made clear to me by the way they ignored me. Of course the Assembly of God Church was warm, friendly, welcoming but I did not intend to go there.

A few years ago I ran for the city council. Got elected and served a term or two and now -- guess what? Now the Presbyterians want me as a member!

I said, That figures. We are like that you know. When you fit out mold we will let you in. Should the Presbyterian Church live on?

SHORT CUT NO HELP The pilot came over the air and said, "John Smith is a controller at the New Jersey Center for traffic control and he is getting married in March. He wanted Walter Jones who leads a band and is flying with us today to get special recognition and special treatment from Delta." Mr. Jones, John has routed us the most direct way so that we are to arrive 10 minutes early in Atlanta, but I regret to tell you that Traffic Control in Atlanta has ordered us to slow down because we will arrive too early and they cannot get us on the ground. Sorry! Is that what we do? Hurry up so we can wait?

SCARS FROM THE BATTLE John White lived in N. Little Rock. He helped a refugee from Viet Nam. He was 10 years old when his family befriended the refugee. He had them over once for a meal. Noticed that they ate things they did not know. At 10 he lacked the sensitivity that he might have had later. So he asked what it was like to live in Nam. The Man got up from the table, pulled his tank-top up and showed him his wounds. He had long dark scars where he had fought since he was a youth.

John said, "It is a wonder that you are not at the front the peace movement." "Who say's I'm not." These scars and the man’s response began to shape John's life and eventually got him in the ministry.

GOOD FRIDAY CONVERSION Deborah was a defiant person. She had left the church, denied God, did all those things that made her feel very guilty, sex and drugs. Had a husband and job but an empty gnawing feeling deep down inside. She was an actress and worked with a fundamentalist in a show. She decided to show him her knowledge: "You really know about the bible?” He said that he did and affirmed what she also knew. She decided to go to church to prove it would not matter She got caught by the message and the warmth of the people. On Good Friday her pastor prayed for about 20 minutes bringing all the sins he could name to the Lord and he told the congregation to bring their sins to God. Hold them up before God. God says, "I will forgive you sins!" God did and it changed here life.

FUTURE "I'd rather see where I'm going that to recall where I've been." A man was losing his eyesight. The Dr. gave him 6 months before he would lose his sight. Dr. said I can clip a nerve and destroy your memory but you can retain your sight. What would you rather have your memory or your sight. "I’ll take my sight because "I'd rather see where I'm going that to recall where I've been."

INFLUENCE IN THE WORLD Pastor asked the children to visualize what the church was doing in the world. How it was reaching out to people. He spoke to them about "being the church" in the world which of course they did not know anything about. After a strong emphasis he said, "Now, do you think you can be the church in the world.?" One little girl, sprattled legs, chewing gum in the middle of the groups said in a loud, guttural voice, "NAAAAAA!"

INTERNALIZE THE BIBLE At the funeral of Jarrett Fayette Davis in the sermon by Monroe Swilley, he described how he had heard a sermon by J. Wilbur Chapman and wrote in the margin of the Bible: Read it though, Pray it in, Live it out, Pass it on." A Good admonition.

TELL YOUR MOTHER NOW Jim wondered how he would feel when his mother died. He had fought with her for years. "Go tell your mother that you love her, that you want all clear with her before she dies, and don't expect her to respond positive to you." Hal Edwards gave me this advice and it helped me tell my mother what she had meant to me all the years of her life.

PRESBYTERIAN BURIAL Some folk are prejudiced. " Jim's dad had a funeral by two Baptists in Atlanta but when he got to Macon, Georgia for the graveside and the interment, a cousin said, "The Presbyterians can't even bury a body without contaminating the soul." The service was conducted by a Presbyterian from Perry, Georgia a PCUSA minister. "Well I'm worried about Fayette’s soul -- died in Atlanta, buried in Macon by a Presbyterian preacher."

OPENNESS TO RELIGION William hurt, "The Doctor, a lonely, insensitive man who faced death and found intimacy.” In the end: June had a brain tumor (he had gone to see her the night before he death and told her that he could not feel close to Ann, his wife. June wrote him a letter which he read to his wife after her death in the final scene of the movie.

A story will help – a farmer who hated animals, ran away the birds, rabbits, etc. He became sick of his loneliness and went out into the field and stood very still hoping they would get his message. Occasionally, he would wave at a bird that flew by. But he looked like a different kind of scare crow from the one that they feared. Finally, one day it occurred to him to let his arms down and they would come. They did. June said --- "John (William Hurt), let your arms down and they will come to you." What relief and healing there is when we let down our defenses.

PRESBYTERIAN "STICK” ELITIST Dick Donaldson, Ph. D. at UC Davis. He talked of the reason the church does not grow -- 3 to 5% fit with us. Lots come in and pass through to the evangelicals, charismatics, or the fundamentalists. We figure that those who belong to us will stick. They will recognize that we are where they need to be. I fear that too much of our program is Teflon coated and they just slide right through.

IMAGES OF GOD Wendy Dreitcer, a minister, was pregnant with a child and one of the boys at church who was 7 years old asked if she were going to name the baby Jesus? One way that the divine image manifests in female clergy.

NO CHURCH BACKGROUND Cameron was 4 yrs. He had never been to SS. And he was asked "Who was Jesus father?" Cameron said, “Bob.” His mother was reared in the church and realized that her son had never heard the stories of Mary and Joseph.

HISTORY --- Everything today is the sum of the past, nothing is comprehensible except through its history." Teilhard, Future of Man. This applies to the personal life and the life of spiritual growth.

HEALING AT COMMUNION I had for weeks been burdened with my sin and guilt of unworthiness. I so need the grace of God While I was singing the hymn 282 --"God be merciful to me (Ps 51), these words spoke to my heart and brought me to Him. I sang this prayer before a communion service. And, the bread and wine were for me. It was world wide communion Sunday. God does forgive our past and empowers our future.

BREAD AND WINE (Fred Craddock) Invited to Winnipeg. An Indian Summer. But freezing snow and ice came. He was told they could not pick him up for lunch but that he should just go to a restaurant 2 blocks from the hotel. It was a small restaurant. A few lumberjacks made room for him to sit. The cook/waiter was in an apron. All he had left was soup and it was cold because they had no electrical power. Then an old woman came in for a "cup of hot water." O, she was embarrassed with no money...." You must order or leave, he said. She stood. But a lumberjack said, "If she don't eat, I don't eat. And they all stood up, “If she don't eat, we don't eat.” I'll pay for the soup. OK! OK! She ate. Craddock said, "I ate it and you know what that soup tasted like "Bread and Wine."

MISUNDERSTANDING THE WORD Nancy went to First Church San Anselmo. Someone said to her have you made a Cursillo?" "No but I made an afghan!" This is being in the dark.

JUDGMENT OF MATTHEW 25 At the judgment there were three lines. One was sheep, the other was goats, and there was one person in the other line, Bozo the clown. And a lot of fork like me feel like they are Bozo.

ENGENDER CHANGE A book on management "Teaching an Elephant to Dance; is, of course, a metaphor. To train an elephant, put a metal band on his foot when he is young. Tie it to a stake. He will learn that he can only go so far and he will not try to go farther. He acclimates himself to the restraints, so that when he could pull up a stake twice as big and deep as the one to which he is fastened, he will not.

How do you make the elephant move? 1. Remove the band; 2.Give him the smell of smoke -- fears the fire more than remembers the restraint. Here is the problem. How do you take the band off of the elephant without restraining an undisciplined two ton elephant; or how to get the smoke without burning the tent down.

JOYOUS WITNESS We were standing in the line for Cinematic Magic at Universal Studios in LA Two men came up behind us. We smiled at each other. Where are you from – Atlanta. And You? China, Mainland China. My son is in technological research. He was a doctor in China. Now he does research on herpes (pointed to his mouth) what do You do? I asked the man. I am a professor. Medical school? No. My parents were both doctors. You-- a professor at CTS theology. The stranger said, “I'm a Christian. We understand each other. I'm looking for a way to move to the US because Christians are being oppressed in China.”

CONFIRMATION OF CALL MV Parish came to talk about the retreat at N. Ave. Her opening words: “My daughter told me about your dream. It is of God. All your life has been preparation for this thing. It is the most important thing you have ever done." (After talking thru the retreat, I told her of the suggestions I had been experiencing -- doubts, attacks, devil about the Spirituality Program that I was beginning at CTS.)

Then she got up and came over to me. She laid her hands on me and instead of praying she began a to prophesy. "You are my child. I have chosen you for this work. Do not let resistance distract or turn you from my work. I will be with you." The words were simple, direct, assured. I felt no great emotion. Just peace and her voice as soft and assured like the spirit took her voice to keep me going forward with the call. A message not expected or invited.

WALTER'S COUNSEL. He affirmed the vision. Said, "We all know that this is the issue that must be addressed." But it must be set forth in a manner that gives space for the faculty to own it and shape it. Should request a committee to help with the design. They can flesh out the requirements for the program so that it has both legitimacy and faculty ownership

ISOLATED A friend wrote me the following: “In Europe I recognized how isolated I am. No real friends to give myself to. I'm in trouble in my marriage. Don't know what I am going to do. I won't do anything foolish or abrupt. I realize that I have intimacy needs that are greater than M. can meet. She doesn’t know how. No role models in her other life. I wanted you to know that.”

FALSE CHARGE Stopped at the BP Station in Knoxville. Three times I could not get the pump to work. I had asked the attendant about the Holiday Inn. He called before I got there and the desk clerk said, “I should go back and pay for the gas because I had driven off without paying.” Went by to see him. "What will I do if they tell him?" I knew that I had paid before I drove away. When he checked out, the $ amount was right.

CHARISMATIC PASTOR. At Titusville a number of folk were Holy Spirit folk. They asked my friend who is a minister to explore the Full Gospel Business Men’s Fellowship. He said, “I went to hear a man from Texaco speak but he was not my kind of speaker. Then they asked me to listen to Jamie Buckingham. He was a de-frocked Baptist preacher. In the midst of his talk Jamie said, "a minister is here God wants to use in a special way" a Word of Knowledge someone said. I went forward in the crowd. To stand before Jamie; I was embarrassed and wanted to get away. But when he considered leaving, he said, “No, I’m open to his prayer for me. My friend told a layman who was with him, “I guess that they thought it was a big catch getting a Presbyterian minister in the net, but I felt the catch was mine.” When Jamie prayed, I felt a melting, a sense of the Divine Presence. Have you got it? Let it Flow? It was flowing for me. And I went on to seek God's will for my life. (I was very moved by this story.)

NEW CONVERSION Bob Alcorn is an introverted fellow who came to talk with me in Knoxville. He asked if he could come and talk but with great hesitancy. He said, "I don't know why I came. I'm an architect. Have had success, mixed up with recession and now business on a day-to-day basis. But, I have felt the pressure inside me. Went to Carson Salyer and wanted to change. Began to pray, got a Christian counselor and talked with him. He is so open and sensitive to the Spirit that he hears what I am trying to say. I am excited about this new life that I have

DIFFERENT LANGUAGE When Dr. Gold tried to explain the x-ray of Chris' back to me he used all the technical language and I did not know what he was saying. So often we Christians use in house language with outsiders, they have no idea what we mean.

SOLO WORSHIP My pastor Tom went to church on the day it snowed big time in Atlanta. Not one person came to church. He stood in the pulpit and went through the whole service, except the sermon, felt he could skip that. "I felt it was a time of true worship,” he said.

PRIORITY Had to cancel the trip to Minnesota at the last minute because my son was in the hospital for an operation on his back. I had never canceled on such short notice in all my ministry. It was reported to me that a man came to the meeting on Saturday and said, "Thank God for a man who knows what his priorities are."

INCLUSIVE/ORIGINAL SIN Paul Hooker said, "We claim to be an inclusive, pluralistic church but I think that means those of us on the left of center. i.e. liberal! I wonder if we aren't deluding ourselves into thinking we are that inclusive. "It is the persistence of sin in the life of the believer,” Paul Hooker said.

CHURCH/DYING/SMALL A church in west Texas called a woman to come and bury the church. They had 20 members and knew they were dying. She began to preach and they grew to 50 in six months . There was a great deal of discomfort in the church. They had brought her to bury the church and it was experiencing resurrection. A man drove by and saw the roof needed repairing and sent $1200 to the church. The clerk, treasurer sent it back. "We're going to die and we can't use your money." Electric bill raised from $8 to $15 because the were using the church. Four elders met and voted to take out the meter. We’re going to die! The pastor was married to a church with a death wise.

LISTENING TO GOD A TV. commercial that illustrates. 1) A couple in the yard and the minister is saying to them, "If anyone knows any reason why ..... let them speak now or forever hold their peace." (Thunder and Lightening) 2) Inside the scene is repeated -- and a faucet drips, drips as if it is trying to say something. Finally, the scene is repeated in the dark with only a candle burning. And when the statement is made, a hard wind blows out the candle. God is speaking but nobody is listening because they do not understand the language of God.

ALL ARE EVANGELISTS "All the Presbyterian pastors I know would baptize a person who professed faith and requested. it." Tom Gillespie. So each is at least open to the most basic evangelistic task. Since all of us are there what are the next steps into doing the work of an evangelists? 2) speak about God naturally; 3) what person ought to do; 4) explain scripture; 5) speak personally about our faith; 6) invite persons to believe and be baptized.

BLESS THE HOUNDS Pastors have opportunity to do lots of things that are not exactly your normal ministerial act. Bill Bryant, pastor of First Church Nashville, said that he was asked to meet with the hunters and bless the hounds -- far as I know there is no law against this kind of public prayer -- They were going to have a steeple chase. While he was praying he said among other things "...may the foxes be keen of smell and fleet of foot" and while he was praying a Walker Hound walked up and wet on his leg, robe and all." I guess that is what he thought of the preacher's prayer.

WITHOUT EARS Man had great success but he had no ears. Interviewed persons for a job. 1) First interview; "Do you note anything unusual about me?" Yes. You don't have any ears. Dismissed and took off the list. 2) the same; 3) Third. Do you.... "Yes, you wear contacts." Got the job. Later, he asked, "How did you know?" "If you'd had ears, you would have had on glasses."

NEW BELIEVERS At Marble church in NYC a couple of people were being interviewed for membership. During the questioning they were asked, "What do you think this interview means." "It is a game of stump the pagans."

ENTHUSIASM Coach Ron Link went home from a game and watched the film immediately. He kept scores, sheets of performance on all players and graded them after every game. His wife who was awakened by his engagement says, "He even yells at the replays."

INTRODUCTION A professor at Union in Virginia was giving an introduction. "I'm not making a long, boring introduction because we have professor Newman here!" Realizing what he had said, "Sorry, you may take as much time as you wish!" "No, I think I'll leave with the rest of you,” the speaker said.

HOW OFTEN DO YOU TEACH? Guthrie said, "I hate people to say, 'how many hours do you teach each week?" Preacher only speaks 20 minutes on Sunday. Walter Brueggemann said, "In answer to such a question I always say that I'm going to give you in this talk all the material that I give in a seminary lecture but there I have to speak very, very slowly, here a bit faster."

PCUSA CRITIQUE FROM A PENTECOSTAL 1) Believe the Bible; 2) Preach the Scripture; 3) Take sin seriously; 4) Invite persons to make a serious decision. These are the errors that cripple evangelism. Someone on the outside can see us better than we can see ourselves.

CHRIST -- COMES UNEXPECTED Tolstoy tells of the cobbler who had a dream that the Christ would come to see him --- along came 1. a little boy who had no shoes; 2. a woman who was lost 3. a beggar who was hungry. In his dream the question was asked "Why didn’t you come." The Lord said, "I was in the barefoot boy, the lost woman, and the hungry beggar." I came to you, you saw, you touched, but because I did not come in the way expected you did not have the joy of meeting me."

EVANGELISM "As long as evangelism is seen as the role of a special interest group in the church, we let the rest of the church off the hook."

"I have a hunch that our religion is dull because our pastors kill every affirmation with a 1,000 qualifications." Tom Gillespie

EVANGELISM AT A PC SEMINARY Bernie Goodwin took a course in Evangelism at CTS. He had 2 shocks that he owned: 1. that a Presbyterian seminary would have a course in evangelism; 2. that they taught it like they believed it was urgent. Holds a Doctorate, teaches at ITC. (Met Dr. Greer who grew the Faith Church of God from 400 to 4,000 in 10 years. He says, "Not evangelism but service to the whole person that has helped us to grow.")

INTERUPTIONS IN LIFE Steve Land -- Church of God. As a boy went to church and sat near the front, always something exciting happened in church. One night a "heckler" came in and heckled, repeated it the second and third night. He was escorted out by two ushers. On the way out he said, "Now I know how Jesus felt dying between two thieves."

CONVINCED "I can see that some of you are not yet convinced but that's O.K. I'm not yet through yet." 1/2 convinced, I'm about 1/2 through.

SIN AND CONVICTION Barbara Jefferson spoke to me on Saturday night in Canton. Tears filled her eyes, she said I don't want to break down. I’m in a relation with a man who is hurting himself and me. She came to witness training and asked if she could talk with me, "I think that you could help me." When did your life begin to come apart. A year ago. Tell me about it. I met a wonderful man, companion, gifts, travel, ideal relation. In two years he began to travel more and he felt I made demands on his time. In a year he had a new friend girl friend. Told her to look around to see if there might be someone else. Barbara was big into denial. I asked her, "How is God at work in your pain?" --- Visit your minister, read these books, attend church, begin a 30 day prayer experiment; keep me posted.

BELIEVE BEFORE BAPTIZED Dan Harris had a Baptist background. He had been taking communion for 2 years. Not baptized. No profession of faith but he had heard the words of institution and invitation and he believed. In counseling with him and his wife he said, "I'm not perfect, could never be good enough to be a Christian." His pastor said to him, "You have taken communion, made your confession, and you are part of the body. What else is lacking?”

NOT PERFECT Leonard Newhart, Ph. D. chemist with Dupont. He had battled with the Church for 25 years. Went to church as a child and it was cold, dead, and he felt unwanted. For 3 years he had been active but he would not join the church. He said that he liked to chew a little tobacco. But worked on the playground with other men. Afterward he said, "I want to join the church, what must I do." Through the relation he discovered that there were others who were not perfect, so he could begin where he was and grow. (Also, remember the man who came into the church as the prayer of confession was being read: "O, Lord, we have done those things we ought not to have done, we have left undone those things that we ought to have done .... When he heard those words, he said, “is my crowd.)

SPELL CHECH On our computers we can check for spelling that is wrong but if the word is spelled right and used wrong, the computer will not pick it up. Is it not possible in life to get the spelling right in the wrong way?

TOO MUCH LIKE ME/ MINISTER Fred went into the ministry as an engineer. He joined his people on vacations. He ate, drank, swore with the elders for 8 years. Often the elders did not know who the minister was. On a retreat they did and evaluation of the church, officers, and the minister. He had a one to one response from the elder he had been with for 8 years. "I appreciate your being in our world but miss your not standing in another world." This statement from an elder had a shaking effect on the minister.

CONFESSION Herb Cottington told me of his missionary family and of his sister who went to Bangladesh. She had gone bouncy, effervescent and came home depressed, empty, and resentful. All wondered why. They learned that she had worked 16-18 hour days with no time for her. About 5 weeks before her death she regained her old bounce. Herb asked her friend, do you know what happened? Yes, she made a list of all her sins, anger, frustration and went to the priest in Black Mountain and made a confession. She was healed and liberated.

DYING CHURCH Denham Grierson, a church consultant in Australia, professor at PSCE said that he found these characteristics in dying churches: 1) faith is intellectual assent; 2. faith is private, 3. Recognize no claim on their energy or priority except their own fellowship, 4 parochial and defensive, 5. emotion is taboo.--- this consensus becomes a cocoon, a shield from life and change. How many churches do we have like this?

LOOKING FOR CHRIST Janice Smith wondered into my office. She was being awakened to faith but did not understand it. She had no church background. At 17 she wondered into a RC church, was baptized but she did not become confirmed. In college she lost all sense of God. God sent her a husband (she is INFP). She began reading the Bible; it spoke to her. Her husband bought her the Bible on tape. How does it speak -- Can't say for sure but it is vague and mysterious. Found peace through the scripture.

A BOOMER Before all the study of the boomers, I met one. He was independent, a visionary and writing a screen play. "Residue of Honor." Graduated from Vanderbilt, a kind of religious humanist, mixed with the Christian gospel. Concerns for his film: 1. Why some secularists are more Christian than Christians. 2. Isolating life from faith, 3. One-way, nah 15 ways to God, 4. Absolutes do us in, 5. Lack of humility in religious leaders. I tried to meet all his concerns. But the real test for me came when I had to say, "I believe that Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life." Risk friendship. "I believe that too, he said."

GOD'S OUTREACH Bryant Harris told me how God had come to him. He was living with his father after the divorce. He began having deep religious feelings, loneliness and questions about life. He looked up the word Jesus in the dictionary and then he looked up Christianity. (God can use a dictionary to speak) He had lots of thoughts about God. Then a girl in Young Life moved next door. She came over and watched TV. with him. They even had a beer together. She gave him a Bible. One day he dropped it in the toilet, looked up and hoped that God had not noticed. Through the girls concern his faith was awakened.

RETURNED PRESENT My aunt Voncile sent my sister's Christmas present back to her. She always sent back my mothers gifts. She is a multi-millionaire and rejects love. So afraid of being made to feel indebted.

HOT AIR Louis Mudge said at McCormick someone put graffiti on the wall of the men's toilet just above the hand dryer. "Press here for a message from the dean."

GOL-LEE I told Ashley, an 8 year old precocious child. "When I was your age I had not even herd of a television. Mrs. Armour was my Vocational Guidance Class showed us a picture of a T. V. in NYC. She said, "Gol-lee as she glanced whimsically at her dad."

DOESN'T HAVE A CHURCH Danny Bryant of Andalusia was about 12 years old and didn't want to go to church on Saturday night where I was speaking. He said, "Why do I have to go listen to this preacher?' He's not as good as Dennis (our pastor), and besides, he doesn't even have a job -- just bums around from one church to another preaching in other pastors’ pulpits." I met him. Like I most often do, I said I'm glad you came. His dad thanked me and told me about the conversation.

DO LOOKS COUNT? Crazy guys in Cleveland, Tenn. decided to see how welcome they would be at church. Steve and his friend dressed in boots, jeans, and a beard. They sought admission to a UMC church. The ushers closed the doors, said they had no room, finally with persistence they gave them 2 rusty chairs in a back corner where they would not be noticed, no one spoke, they sought to speak to the minister but he turned away. Later went back in a $200 suit, spoken to, welcomed., and asked, "where do you work." Does appearance really make that much difference?

CHURCH AT ITS BEST Fred Keith told me about a girl who was a go-go dancer, left home, took up with a biker named John who headed the Devil's Disciples. She went to a hotel with a customer in the club. Next found her in a ditch near Tuscaloosa. At the funeral the Devil's Disciples showed up. John was given a seat by Patricia's father because he had lost 1/2 his foot in an accident, he was on crutches. Here was the church loving at its best.

EVANGELISM/DRIFT Bob Meinelli said, "The church always drifts away from evangelism, never toward it."

NO HANDS Christ statue in French village. Blown up in the war. The people loved it, wished for it, picked up the pieces but could not find the hands. Someone wrote a poem and placed it on a bronze plaque. (Annie Johnson)

I have no hands but your hands to do my work today

I have no feet but your feet to lead men on the way

I have no tongue but your tongue to tell all how I died.

I have no help but your help to bring them to my side.

MODERATION/EVANGELISM/PCUSA Pete Hendrix was lecturing on Evangelism at Austin. Invited questions. Students ask dumb, hard questions. One asked, "What has been the chief contribution that Presbyterians have made to the work of evangelism?" Waved him off, stumbled, coughed. Then a Presbyterian Divine spoke up from the back, "Restrain, my dear fellow, restraint."

LITERAL Beverly Johnson asked her young son Bryan to help with uncovering the pepper and tomato plants in the garden. "Go pull the tops off the plants." They had been covered to keep from freezing. When he came walking back into the house he said, "I pulled the tops off all of them except these two, so I just pulled them up by the roots."

A RUSSIAN JEW -- GOD I noticed your accent. Cab driver in Chicago (303) What is your background? Guess? French? Czech? No, Russian. Been here long? 6 years. What do you think of this country? I love this country; keep the laws, nobody saying anything to you, not true in Russia. In Chicago I work on the Southside, but you cannot move around in Russia, no feelings either way. I wouldn't go to war for a country like that. Have you encountered religion in our country? Yes. I believe in God but I didn't always. How is that? I don't know but it came to me, kinda creeps up on you. What my grandmother said keeps coming back to me: “I had 4 sons, 3 killed, one came back without his right arm.” She said, “It is not Hitler’s fault, Not Stalin’s Fault My Fault. God is punishing me.” I don't understand that. I was born in Kiev, half Jew half orthodox. I’m Jewish. "Michael, I know the God you have come to believe in. I think he wants me to tell you 2 things: He loves you. Yes, he loves everybody...but he knows your and your address and loves your personally, face twitched and eyes watered. AND he wants you to love him and be thankful."

DESERVE YOU? Marilyn said to Rob, "What did I ever do to have a child like you?" "Well, you had sex," I suspect.

RECOGNIZE THE PRESENCE When I went to the church in Pittsburgh to speak I saw a man that I knew that I knew. I looked at him for a few minutes trying to draw up out of my file of faces just who this man was but the name would not come to me immediately Then suddenly it flashed like a strobe light in my mind - he was the man who delivered the eulogy at Bill LaRoach's funeral. The service was over. I was speaking to a middle aged woman, note how this is getting younger all the time -- and I said to her, "I must speak to that man." She told me that he was her husband.

When I told him I was at the funeral of Bill La Roach both he and his wife came to tears. A memory of a previous meeting brought us together and connected us with the past. There is no sense of connection when we do not recognize the presence of another. We are strangers until we are aware. Note how awareness puts you in touch with the past and in touch with each other.

CHRISTIAN KOAN A Koan is a mystery that a Zen master asks persons to meditate on. For example: think about clapping one hand. A Christian Koan would be "If all the waters of he seas should empty into a coke can. What you have is Christmas.

CHURCH -- Organism not organization. Organization means elected officials, goals, objective strategies which are managed like things. An organism is life. It eats, rests, celebrates. There are moments in worship when holiness shines upon the heart. The time when we meet and encounter Another and feel that we are together. Speak of faith naturally To reach out and serve a brother in need when none ever thought of making it a program and other spontaneous actions of compassion. The Organization has a mind set like a board of directors. Agree or give permission. Contrasts with the family image of the organism. (Relate to the baby in the womb that moves when the organ plays worship music. Does the fetus know he is in church?)

SPIRITUAL OPPORTUNITY Nesbit said to Frank Harrington -- "You guys are going to be in great demand to meet the spiritual needs of a high tech society." At the end of megatrends he said, "A great opportunity for change."

DYING. I had not seen Gerald Mundy for 30 years. We had served together in Phenix City, Alabama. He once said to me, "We're serving our time here while we are young." He had surgery, bad transfusion and spent 35 days in the hospital. His son is dying with aids. He asked me: "What do you know?" Life is Good. And what about you, "I'm dying." Out of ministry, women, wine, and money and finally came back at the end of his life to take a small church. An effort to complete his life.

BELIEVE THE BIBLE Mr. Wink Davis, fundamentalist said, "Do you believe the Bible is the word of God?" Doing his duty as an officer. They had heard that I was a Universalist. I think that it is the duty of the leaders to keep the church on track.

LEADERSHIP In the Alpharetta church they were experiencing a lot of frustration because they did not know the way into the future. Where there is no concrete vision for the future the people lack cohesion, they have frustration, and disunity. They said to me, "Tell us how to develop a specific plan, a plan of action for the future."

MINISTER/POLITICS/GOVERNMENT The Rev. George Duffield DD 1771 "Chaplain to the Continental Congress, in connection with Bishop White, during the war of the Revolution. After a laborious and successful pastorate of 19 years, he died greatly lamented, February 2, 1790, aged 58 and was buried under the center aisle of this Lecture Room. He was alike eminent for eloquence, patriotic, and piety. Minister of Old Pine Street Church. An inscription on the wall of the church.

MINISTRY SUFFERING The man had been in jail for 3 months. It cost the county and state $10,000. He refused to post bail. I said, "I knew that ministry was hard but not that hard." (If you don't you'll be transferred to work camp, pick up trash. Now, he posts bond.) He said, "I better get home and shake hands with my wife again."

IGNORE INTUITION Tina Raphael a young woman of 30 or 31 "Did you ever ignore your intuition?"A few days ago I had a child of 8 who did not wish to go to school. I agreed to leave him at home for the day. During the day at school I had this strong urge to go home. I resisted the intuition because I thought it was foolish. When I got home my son met me. What is wrong? Nothing. Did something go wrong? Then the boy said, Shall I tell her dad? Yes! Then he told her that he saw a man shot. He was on a motor cycle and two men pulled guns, they erupted and then the man fell dead. The boy saw them and he was the only witness. (Like move Witness) And he has been interviewed over and over by the police. And it happened at 3:00 o'clock, at the very time that she had the strong urge to go home.

GOD IN THE OPPOSITE Joan Lichman (Old Pine) asked me about God in the opposite. That one has to be in a place of contradiction to know what God's will is (Is this not the same as Stan's notion that God comes to us in the sea, in the storm, the place of testing.) How do you discern the voice of God. Obviously, you have learned to distinguish. 1. Begin with Christ. He is the tangible expression of God. 2. Read with one question in mind -- what is God's will for me? After question and answer, she came up "Life has been hard for me. My family, early experience, at 40 cut off all my previous life. I'm Jewish. 3. Sometime the weeds have to grow in the wheat. A contradiction we have to live with.

FAST LANE Someone said, "We have moved from the fast lane to the oncoming lane."

END OR BEGINNING Don Robison of Old Pine said, "This is not the end; it is not the beginning of the end; perhaps, it is the end of the beginning." Sir Winston Churchill.

POWER Don Robinson's parents were instrumental in winning an older couple to Christ in Boca Raton. They had a daughter in Philadelphia: drugs, welfare, 2 children, mixed race and unmarried. BAD The mother of the daughter who had been won to Christ by Don's parents called and said we are coming up. Met at the airport, went to her home, experienced the power of salvation. No response or not the expected one. As Don's parents were leaving one of the little children of mixed race asked, "Does Jesus love me?" You bet. She accepted Christ. Don't know how but the young mother did too. She is not in Florida working. She plans to go as a missionary. We never know how the Spirit works. Always the unexpected.

CHURCH STRUCTURE UNITY The associate minister at Old Pine Street lamented that they could not weld together such a diverse body of people. Bill Pender was a charismatic leader who brought in Jew, Catholic, former fundamentalists, evangelicals, liberals and straight Presbyterians and they were mostly held together by his personality, affirmation and vision. So many persons came in looked and passed through. The young minister said we cannot integrate them because there is nothing to join, no vision spelled out -- i.e. a statement of identity. Everyone has their own idea and does their own thing.

WRESTLER "RICKY STEAMBOAT" A professional wrestler. He came to Doug's Church in Charlotte with Bonnie, a model from NYC. Had to work on his stereotypes. In Atlanta years later, Doug met a man at Rotary who spoke about Ricky, He said that Ricky and his wife had a child, "little dragon". Do they make much money? About a million a year or more. "How do I get in contact?" Doug said. Always the fund raiser!

OFFENDED MINISTER I met him in Pittsburgh. I gave a talk on evangelism in the church. Then I asked the group to choose a partner and respond to the talk. In the feedback session, a minister stood up and said, "What I have to say you may not wish to hear." Go ahead and let me hear it. He said, "YOU have laid on the guilt, desperate words. I believe the church has done much good. You don't recognize what we are doing that is worth while and expressive of Christ; we need encouragement and not what we are not doing; need love and not law; grace for our failure. I said, "Come on Don, do you really think we are doing the work of evangelism?" Then he said, "People want intelligent sermons that deal with real issues: homophobia, freedom for abortion, race and one day they will appreciate the gospel." All this witness is evangelism -- feeding, clothing, prophetic witness." How is it working? "The people who visit our church do not come back. Only about 1/3 agree with what we are preaching.

REACH OUT IN THE MAIL Wendell and Janet Fabian were strange looking. They seemed poor, patched jeans, leather jackets. I had to look 2 or 3 times. He was an elder and chair of Evangelism. He wanted to mail 1,000 letters for the Easter Service. A lady said, "You can't do that." Wanted to overrule him. Stop the mail. There might be so undesirable folk in the list. Then she demanded that they pay an admission to the egg hunt. Nobody came! You can't relate as evangelist to an egg hunt next year. "And you still go to that church." I was thinking the other day but I have been a Catholic most of my life and I wondered if all the Presbyterians were like this.

Horror Story of evangelism Jim Boos is pastor of a small church in Western Pennsylvania. Had 150 members when he went there. Now 600 and a 1,000 seat sanctuary. Stabile community, synod that loses 25% of the denominations losses each year. In the past decade the synod has lost 10,000 members. But his church is growing. New sanctuary and has 5 Christmas services each year. Here is where Darlene found Christ -- my friend with mystic visions.

MINISTER NOT SPEAKING FOR CHRIST In Pittsburgh I was talking to Bruce Schling, present chairman for evangelism. Talking about the reluctance of clergy to speak to others of Christ. He recalled: 1. how early in Christian life he spoke to other when he was working with Young Life 2. how during Gordon Conwell days he spoke; 3. But now, he will play softball sit by Jim Smith and not say a word though he does think about it. 4. He thinks of the pulpit as the place to do that work. If the General is afraid how can he lead the troops?

PERSONAL SELF-CONFRONTATION How often we seek to avoid confronting our self. BUT how difficult. I was in a dark restroom. While there in the dark, I came out and met a tall man in a dark suit, he had gray hair. I stepped to the left to avoid bumping into him; he stepped the same way. I stepped to the right to seek from hitting him. He too. I stopped and looked closely, somewhat familiar figure and then there was a streak of light and I saw that it was myself standing there in a mirror. How strange! I'd been trying to avoid myself and it just wouldn't let me do it.

DIVORCE Lon Bowden came from Bristol Virginia to Union Theological Seminary in Richmond, VA. First you are great! Do you know that? Best I have ever heard. Then when you did the marker events on the board. Until you put down the word divorce, I did not know that you have been divorced. After the session she said "I couldn't believe you put the "d-word on the board I'm sorry but I have not been perfect. She 1. adopted a son who is married to a woman with a baby. Not his baby. 2. Step-daughter will not speak to her --hates her father. Still people are helped by a sharing of their failure. I have found it easier to say that after 15 years. "You put the D word up there and you knew I would see it. Hard for me to see you in that light but you had courage to admit to all of us your failure."

PASTOR'S PSYCHOLOGY I finished my address at the School of Evangelism at Union Seminary. A person from the Shenandoah Valley became deeply moved and it was apparent. Determined to get my point across. "You are right about pastors and their not talking with laity about God. When we go in to talk with a pastor they analyze us, try to figure out what's wrong with us, pass it off with a joke, or give us a one-liner. We feel abused, shamed, and somewhat angry. So we lay people don't go to our preachers anymore. What have you been teaching them in seminary?

WEDDING During the wedding conducted by Robert Burkins the groom in the midst of the service threw up his hands and said, "Preacher, I can't go through with it. And he turned and ran out of the church. He was worried. He had been in the church for 1 ½ months and he wondered if they would think he had failed in counseling. After that the whole town knew him as the preacher who had the groom run out on him. (Woman had $8000 gown and a $25,000 reception. When the groom left, the father of the bride said, “Let’s go on with the party, the food is there and wedding is off, but let’s eat and drink and make merry.”)

CHRIST INCARNATES Carlo says, "... and to make sure that we understand he (Jesus) translates into visible terms the invisible things he has seen -- as man he acts as God would act; he introduces the ways of the family of God on to the earth and into the family of man." IN SEARCH --- from Prayers for Ministers and Servants p. 158

WAYS OF THE SPIRIT (from Progoff) 1. Reality is beneath appearances; 2. God communicates through symbols; a symbol is a mystery, more than logic can grasp, grasps us. 3. Manifests itself in an atmosphere of reverence. 4. Gives being to everything but is separate from everything. 5. We can be drawn into and listen to, have it actualized in our lives: dreams, intuitions, twi-light images, contemplation of scripture. "our memory has a bottom and that bottom is the mystery of divine creativity, waiting to be known." "...energy of God as it infuses the person is spontaneously clothed in an incarnate form." U. Holmes reflection on Spirituality.

FAITHFULNESS Are you a faithful witness of Christ. Here is a little quiz composed by a Mr. Paul K. Hasson, to see if you apply the same standards of faithfulness to your church activities that you do in other areas of life. If your car starts one out of 3 times do you consider it faithful? If your paper carrier skips Monday and Thursday editions do you call him faithful? If you fail to come to work 2 or 3 days a month, does your boss call you faithful? If your refrigerator quits for a day now and then, do you excuse it and say, "Oh, well, it works most of the time"“ If your water heater greets you with cold water one or two mornings a week, would it be faithful. If you miss a couple of mortgage payments in a year's time would your mortgage holder say, Oh, well, ten out of twelve is not bad. If you miss the worship once or twice a month are faithful. And if you witness now and then does the Lord consider you faithful? Compare with the driver in Cape Town whose name was Witness and was always a Witness because that was his name.

JUST A TOUCH Somewhere I met a nurse. I asked her how she spoke with patients. She said sometimes all I can do is touch. "Not brutal" when you touch. Sometime I am with those who suffer and as their nurse all I can do is reach out to them and touch them gently. It is a way of being with them of letting them know that they do no suffer alone. I have questions myself --- these are like tender plants, must not squeeze, knock them down. Her parents worship their ancestors and I think that she professed no religion but I wonder if she did not exercise the sacrament of touch in the lives of those who were suffering. Met her in Sacramento Ca. for just a few minutes.

SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHERR (HATTIE LYNN) I would like to have known Miss. Hattie, that's what we would have called her. Paul Evans went to Sunday School, began in the first grade, graduated from the class after 12 years. Miss Hattie advanced with them. He and a friend decided to do a "This is your life" for 87 year old Hattie. After 20 years one was a brain surgeon from Johns Hopkins, another a supt. of schools in Nyack N. Y., another an attorney in Scranton,, a Federal Court Judge, and a PCUSA minister. All shared their faith and told how Christ had worked in their lives through Miss Hattie Lynn. With tears one of the former students said, "I don't believe I can name one thing she taught me but she showed to us Christ.

CHURCH NEEDS TO REMEMBER In Nampa I emphasized that the church has forgotten and needs to Re-Member. Anamnesis. To recreate in the present what has happened in the past. That is what we do when we worship; it is what we do when we break bread; it is what we do when we go out to serve.

DISNEY WORLD TWO-LEVEL OPERATION They operate on 2 levels those above ground with the guests and those underground working behind the scenes. They operate on the basis that the guests have a right to be entertained. Below ground, they can rest, cry, fuss, be ugly, and comb their hair, sew on button but not when they are with the guests. Disney gives them 6 weeks of training to sweep the streets.

Our task is to help the church become hospitable to all the guests that come to see us. "Everyone has a right to be loved and made to feel welcome to the House of God." We must prepare the people to issue the welcome.

WELCOME ME NOT A women in Pocatello, Id. told me that she went to work for the chamber of commerce. She served on the welcome wagon. In the course of making her rounds she met a woman who had been over-attended. She said that she had visited 3 churches, 3 pastors had come to visit, 3 welcome letters from each of the churches for 3 weeks running, 3 lay calls, and 3 newsletters crowded her mail box. She said to her friend, "If I come to your church are you going to follow up?"

Response: "I belong to the PCUSA and you don't have to worry about much attention from us. We make you come 3 times before we even noticed that you have been . . . and then only slightly."

DECISION RISK IN THE CRISIS ARISTOTLE was walking in the garden, followed by 3 students. If you were in a boat in a storm what would you do, he asked. 1. Ptolemy said throw over board every thing of value to appease Poseidon. 2. Aristarchus said, turn the mast into a sea anchor and hold steady and ride out the storm; 3. Alexander "I don't know." And Aristotle said "Right, He walked away." Alexander, not satisfied followed him. My father is paying you tell me the answer. You know! You do not know until you face the crisis and in the crisis you must decide...and even then you must risk and act.

SPIRITUALITY AS ACTION Martha is a nurse who takes care of a patient with Lou Gregg’s Syndrome. Lady has no movement. Paralysis, eyelids are all that will move. She is in hospice ... not supposed to speak of religion to people without their speaking to you first. Martha said, "I am going to read the Bible, pray because I see no other help for this person. "I won't read the Bible, if you refer I not." She blinked that it was O.K. So I have read most of the N. T. to her. Some of it I do not understand. and I tell her I don't, but I read it any way.

She asked me, "What would you do?" I Don't know. I Expect I would read the Gospels and Psalms.

UNIVERSAL PRINCIPLES Barry Davis at the Oglethorpe asked me, "Do you have any universal principles of Evangelism?" I thought for a few minutes and said: 1. Know Jesus Christ, 2. Speak of Christ in a natural way, 3. Care for other persons; 4. Worship in a community, 5, Invite others into that community.

SELF SEEN IN THE TEXT Eddie, a sensate type. Told how he had trouble with charismatics, split the church, had poor theology wanted to take over the church, felt they would destroy the church.

We did work in Mark 2:1-12 He identified with the Pharisee and played out the role: Who is Jesus, What qualifications? If we let him take over anyone can. Be destructive to our religion. Where would we be if he took over?

And he never realized how much he had made the scribes into the charismatics in his church.

PRESBYTERIAN WITNESS Dot Hendrix told about 2 street people coming to church. The minister asked them to dinner. They ate, came to program, introduced as new members. She was introduced to Cecil Spinks. He joined in, laughed, and enjoyed himself. "How do you join this church?" Dot said, "I think by a profession of faith, reaffirmation, or transferring your letter....No, no that's not it."

"Why do you want to join this church?" Then in candor she asked, "What would you have said to this man?' (to me) "I'd be interested in what you've experienced here that makes you want to join.

One of them asked Dot, "Were you a model?" You sure could have been." Pete spoke up, "You do have a pleasant face." But your body is getting older. Dot didn't sleep with him for 2 nights. "When anyone is ugly, you say, “You do have a pleasant face."

CHINA MYTH In primeval days the gods were on earth. Gods sent semi-divine figure. An archer, dragons in the heavens causing pain. The archer shot down the dragon. Archer married a human ,which a beautiful woman. He and wife given a cup and became immortal. If you drink too much you will be 1/2 way frozen. She drank whole cup. Then she was transported to the moon. Moon figure. Archer died, had no potion. Tragic note. Man conquers dragon.

POWER OF MIND Russian meat packer was in the refrigerator car. The door closed. He banged on the wall. With a black crayon he wrote of his experience. Got sleepy, then numb etc. he died. But the motor malfunctioned and the temperature never got below 55 degrees. His perception and imagination were stronger than reality. Feelings are sometimes stronger than they are right. (Air current --- get me down on the express way where I am safe). I recall thinking of Christ when I felt close to him. We'll love back but he won't recall. God recalls but we are unaware of God's memory.

THE SCARS Tom was in Memphis. Saw a man in the church who was covered with scars. His ears were gone. Went to dinner with him. Jack stopped for gas. His daughter asked, "Did anyone tell you how he got burned." No. The gas loaded in the motor home was filled with butane and it became a blazing inferno. My dad came through the blaze to find me and my mother and to rescue us from danger.. "I think my father is absolutely beautiful. I do too! The scars are scars of love.

BASES COVERED Al Clark told me of a student of his who said that she could not take a test on Saturday. Why, he asked. It was her religion she explained. What are you, he asked. "I am a Hebrew Pentecostal." Al said Do whatever you wish. Man, did U want to make points with her. Think about the connection she has --- a black, female, Hebrew, Pentecostal -- she has all the bases covered.

VISIONS A man at an AA meeting said, "If you get to the place you see a Cow, that is a miracle but not a very big miracle. If you see a daisy, that is also a miracle but not a very big miracle. But if you see a cow, sitting on a daisy, singing like a canary, that is a miracle. But even that does not compare with the miracle of me ---WAKE up in strange beds, put a dint in the car and never know it, be evil to my wife and never apologize

SUCCESS A coach from Texas who worked as a scout for Bear Bryant at A & M. He said I learned from my family and farm background that when you are plowing mules you need 1. a good team; 2. never look back because you can't plow a straight furrow looking back, look toward the goal, 3. let the dirt fly. (saying of the Bear) I wondered what the Bear said at the half Never go in there but when I asked the boys they said, "We don't recall what he said but that he said something to me." Is that what preaching is about?

NEW MEMBER CLASS A woman who came to faith in a new member class in Bethlehem Pa. Keith Brown taught. She said, "I think that pastors are afraid and don't want to offend members. They don't like to ask if they are Christian. She has been taking courses at Austin to "know" what the faith is. Take one step at a time.

STOPPING THEIR EARS A Lady at Mount Pleasant sat in church with her fingers in her ears when they blew the trumpet. She was lonely, hurt, husband dead, no children, or family. When she first came to church to meet one of the ministers she had not been out of the house in 5 months. (I knew some folks didn't listen when they came to church but she was the first I had ever seen demonstrate against the minister and his words by sticking her fingers in here ears.)

INTEGRITY After a vacation his father said to Anthony Bloom "I worried about you.” Did you think I'd had an accident? That would have meant nothing, even if you had been killed. I thought you had lost your integrity. Later on he said. "Always remember that whether you are alive or dead matters nothing. What matters is what you live for and what you are prepared to die for."

DOCTRINE OF GOD The students at the University of Chicago were able to select the speakers to come and speak about Methodology for arriving at a Doctrine of God. They chose Paul Holmer and Charles Hartshorne. When Hartshorne spoke he went into an elaborate presentation of process philosophy and its application to the doctrine of God as becoming. When Holmer spoke he said, "God is great; God is good, Let us than him for our food." The students were angry that they had paid for this. but they probably recalled it and will tell the story until their dying day. (I said to Jeff, "God is doing great things in your life, don't forget to be grateful."

JANE LEISTER ACTRESS She attended Old First in San Francisco. She learned that the Bible is the door. She was running in the fast lane, living with a man she was not married to. Attended a Christian drama group in Houston and applied to a college in Midland Mich. She got 3 months fellowship to study drama. The Idea of The Woman Magazine came to her there (she met and knew Kirk Hudson in Michigan) She and Tom, Agent for Mass Mutual Ins., lived together in SF. Another woman came along and took him from her. The drama idea got born at First Presbyterian in Orange County, then at Big Lake Texas. What do you need money to do? I know God had me listening for a reason. And I thought I'd ask. A daring woman with an exciting ministry.

BLESSED BY GOD "Lucky” A poster on a light pole "Lost Dog” One ear, one eye, broken leg. Then there was a note from a child attached "and he answer to the name 'lucky'“ Does not the love of Christ make us lucky.

GOSPEL (NOT KNOWN) WORDS NOT UNDERSTOOD On the trip from Austin a young man with an athletic bag and head set sat beside me. Got our food and then talked His name is Alessandro Gabino (Italian) I was reading Foolishness to the Greeks, by Leslie Newbigen. "The gospel and our culture." He asked "What does the word gospel mean.“ Good news, God loves you. What a question to an evangelist. Not in church, a catholic of course, trained in catholic schools, boring, good priest he said, do you consider the meaning of your life. There was silence for long time. I said, "God loves you and wants you to know the meaning of your life." I asked him and he will tell you -- if you have a great desire, pray for an open door.

WITNESS (LynnWestergaard) He took a widow down town. Mrs. Smith or something and on the way she asked, "Do you know Christ personally?" Not very well, he said, I will pray for you. He did meet Christ. A verse in Isaiah came to him --"not to forget the widows” He began a service to widows, elderly. To do odd jobs for them. He got prison volunteers and this led into a work in the transition from prison to productive live again. When he learned the problems of the elderly he became an advocate at the Public Service Commission to help get the rates down. He has helped elderly save $7.5 0 a month = 9 million dollars total for the elderely.

WHY THE CHURCH Eugene Peterson said "If you persuade me to go to the baseball game and I don't know what I am seeing, what is happening on the field is uninteresting to me. Then I see fans, placards, and then I get up and get a hotdog and a coke. I leave and go home. Friends wonder why I don't come back. Do I go back and get free hot dogs and cokes. Don't do that to me "Give me more of what I've got." What we need to do is help people know what the church is about so they can appreciate who we are and what we do.

SPEAK OF GOD Tom Beason said "I have met God and I don't know how to talk about it. I have been hard after God. I have seen God standing with open arms. Rise up to him and the last moment I veer away. I'm afraid God will change me, make me into something else. But he has turned to me 2 or 3 times and I see him completely differed as if I am in focus. To think God loves me, loves that much. I can say these things to you because I know that you understand what I am talking about and won’t think that I am a fundamentalist.

DEPRESSED NEED HELP John Cantwell is a cardiologist who teaches at the Baptist Hospital. His focus is preventive medicine, rehabilitation of heart patients. Written 2 texts and has a retarded child. He is 47 and has been depressed. I asked him about his physical condition, psychiatrist, and his fellow physicians say "a stage" you are going through. I asked him to tell me about himself -- vacation, sources of nurture, major conflicts, sources of guilt, religious life.

He began with "I believe in God, that we should obey, tried to read the theologians and no help. C. S. Lewis and a few aided him. I gave him TO WILL and asked him to read it.

But much later I learned that his wife had given him hell about a young woman he had met but had nothing to do with her. He was afraid and his fear kept him from being free. I know the feeling but the risk of being who you are is terribly difficult in his situation.

CLEAR CALL. I heard this from Ken Baucomb. He had a belief in God but was not a Christian when he went to the University of North Carolina. He got a Rotary Scholarship. He became a Christian at an evangelical church in Switzerland after he had gotten an M. A. at UNC. He taught Latin at Radford in Virginia. and God called him to Africa. Most calls in his life have been firm and clear. "The kind of call that is so strong and clear, there is nothing else to do but go." Then he felt a call back to the U. S. Spent 4 years near Charleston where he did consulting in education and got his children started in college. Now he is back in Heckpoort, South Africa running the retreat center.

FALSE ALARM Having dinner at the Melrose Inn with Nan and Holly and I had just finished the entrée when the alarm went off at 8:10. Assured us there was no fire but why are we leaving. At 8:35 the mgr announced that a bomb threat had been phoned in on the watts line. It was to go off at 8:21 p.m. Now you are free to return to your table and finish your desert. What does this mean when some crank calls in and interrupts your dinner. Better to be safe than sorry!

ANXIETY IN THE PRESENCE OF POWERFUL PEOPLE (I can refer to my experience in Orlando.) Justo Gonzalez was recommended to teach a course for lay people in Puerto Rico. An official high in the government came. Justo felt cramped. This man was equal to the Attorney General or Secretary of State. One day he came into the class and gave a newspaper clipping to Justo that read: "Political leaders are like books in a library, the higher they are on the shelf, the less value they have." Put him at ease.

SPIRITUALITY (as defined by Don Salier) "Spirituality is the internalization of the gospel in such a way it affects one's whole being. .... it is humanity in full stretch before God and in relation to the neighbor. There seem to be 4 strands of spirituality: 1. holiness -- images, feelings and expectations. 2. sharing histories and reflecting on histories to broaden and form them; 3. Prayer -- the modes of prayer correspond to our experience of life: gratitude, memory (recollection of presence) truth seeking (confession, witness, prophecy) and compassion -- intercession and solidarity. 4 Worship -- never fixed but always shaped by our image of holiness and where it is manifest.

LOOKING FOR COMMITMENT Christ Wrenderoth was reared in an aggressive agnostic home. She majored in religion at the University -- Oberlin. Graduate school to study and argue theology but she had no existential commitment to God. Came to CTS to find commitment and academic respectability. But what about structures: administration, staff, faculty, full associate, assistant. etc. I believe she came to an existential faith as the result of our teaching a course on Evangelism and Faith development. Soon after that she was baptized, made a profession of faith, and joined North Decatur Church.

CLERGY ANXIETY OVER THE VERBATIM James Stearling asked, "Do I have to talk with someone or can I just make up the verbatim?" Don Muncie said, "I pray for God to work in our congregation but if God were to, I'd be scared to death that I would lose control -- things might happen." Fred Rose said, "I went to seminary thinking that I would try it for ten years in the ministry. It has been 10 years and not much has happened. Can I go on?"

WHAT KIND OF CLERGY ARE OUT THERE? Man on the pulpit committee said to Glen Bucher "No fire, no risk, no social concern, there's really not much out there. With respect to the burning issues of the close of the 20th century, the church is about 5 minutes from the museum --- the words of a lapsed Roman Catholic. Someone has said, "It is not the answers but the questions that shape our togetherness. Before the Holocaust we asked 'What does it mean to pray?' but afterward we ask, 'Where is God now?'"

SCIENTFIC APPROACH AND RELIGION How would we describe the scientific approach? It is objective, arms length; 2. Analytical, cut into pieces; 3. experimental -- move the pieces around to see what you can discover. If we apply this to faith, this method robs us of the essence of religion, MYSTERY. The personal experience of God is subjective, it happens within the self; holistic, not just a part of the person but the whole person; and submission to that which is beyond us; and not something that we move and manipulate at will. The scientific and the technological will never bring us into the depths of risk and faith.

COURAGE TO INTERPRET FOR YOURSELF Robin Williams in the Dead Poet's Society had the students to tear out the chapter on interpretation (hermeneutics) that is 'how to read poetry' "You don't need it. Read it and interpret it for yourself." First hand encounter with the dynamite of truth, the personal reading of the text. You can read the Bible and understand the message.

FINISHED PREACHING Bishop Bev Jones UMC was preaching at the Shingle Roof Camp Meeting. A little girl of 6 climbed over the altar and stood by him while he was preaching. She was very quiet. He paused and looked down at here and she asked, "Are you almost done." Almost.

FORGIVENESS I met Agnes Hofmeyer. She was born in Kenya. The Mau Mau influenced by a priestess decided to sacrifice a human because things were going badly for them. They chose her father and buried him alive. He had been cruel to blacks but was changed after his conversion. After her mother died she had become an atheist but she went to a meeting in Oxford and there she was introduced to the Oxford Group Movement -- a House Party. Met the 4 absolutes: truth, honesty, love, and obedience. Later she met a black man in the movement who confessed that he was one who had helped put her father to death. In Kenya she and the black man both gave their witness of confession and forgiveness and reconciliation and the whole gathering got caught up in the spirit of reconciliation.

MINISTER'S PAIN Shep Grider called "I am in a quandary. I want to leave but I can't. Are you as discouraged as you sound? Yes. What is going on. 6 years ago I came here and worked hard but my energy is depleted. I have conducted 2 searches for music and an associate. They gave my DCE a $1000 bonus and commended me for $0. Review of the staff not helpful, too positive for the DCE who got $1500 "I have never felt so discounted in my entire ministry." (Wants to move but his wife is fearful lest the second child get in trouble like the older one did when he moved to Huntsville.) Don't try to carry it by yourself. Come on over and let's spend time together.

SPIRITUALLY ALIVE OR CRAZY? Pat Grant was married for 30 years. She got a Divorce. "God has been so near to me and no matter what, I am being sustained." My life has caved in and I have a vision for my life in a new way. Is this God or am I crazy." Came to school to Discern God’s Will

A LIBERAL CHURCH EVANGELIZES (Larry Porter) He went to a liberal UMC in Cal. His mother was a secretary and his dad was an engineer. Early he was disillusioned with the youth group. He was kidded by a girl named Annabel. They were more polite to him at school than they were at the Youth meeting. He decided to drop out. Then he had a Church of the Brethren girl friend. He got bad news from them --"Not but one answer to the way to God and we have it." In college he studied sociology, anthropology and tried different religions including Zen Buddhism. He married, graduated from University of Colorado. His awakening began when he heard Ed Smith in Little Rock Ark. In 24 hours he came to see him and he laid on Ed all his questions about the Bible. Ed listened with no fight. Said, "I hope to see you soon in Church." Later Ed said, "I think God has told me that he wants you in the ministry. Just before leaving the Civil Service he got a call and was offered G-12 rating. He decided for ministry. Ed took him with him on all his calls for a day to show him what the ministry included. No surprises.

STATE OF CANADIAN CHURCH Ron Van Auken said, "You have to understand the hesitancy of Canadian Presbyterians to speak about their faith." Do you think they are worse than the US. Presbyterians. "Yes, by far." Then they must have gone underground!" BCJ Strange how we outdo each other in our badness.

SECULAR PEOPLE I met Max and Sandra on EA 327 from Toronto. They were from Nova Scotia. He had left home at 15, an older man took him under wing and mentored him. Later Max was given a chance to buy a business. Mr. Williams his mentor said that he would back him. He loaned him $190,000 and Max paid him back in 2 years and assumed the bank loan. Max is an entrepreneur, sells graders and repairs them. Sandra had an alcoholic father. She is a teacher. She has 4 children, 2 older girls. and two boys. Father was a real Christian with an aura of love, not a straw in someone's way. My mother said he was only an alcoholic on the week-end.

Max, do you ever think of God? He responded with how hard he worked and seemed to feel that to thank God would depreciate his own efforts.

Finally he said, "No ...... but I do appreciate what God has done."

KNOWS HE'S NOT GOD At a dinner Pete was talking with me about Dean Griffith. He is astounding. I have never known a man of his place and power that can change his mind and behavior so readily. He says he will not go public and then when it is the only way to go forward he does it. He tells his employees that he has problems with issues in his life and shows them that he is human. WHY? I thought about this for a moment, "You know, Dean can do this because he knows that he is not God." He knows that he is under authority of One who is greater than he and he does not need to be god.

IMAGE OF EVANGELISM I got these from an old minister in Canadian Presbyterian Church regarding how we invite or don’t invite people : 1. Storefront -- here is the merchandise, come in if you wish, it has been here all the time for you; 2. Insurance Salesman, goes door to door trying to sell what folks are not interested in; and he is intrusive and pressing his point; 3. Celebration: invitation, come in, share the joy, a commemoration of something that is important.

CONTRIBUTIONS OF PRESBYTERIANS TO EVANGELISM (From Louis Weeks) 1. We pay attention to all of Scripture -- not just justification, human sinfulness and the divine purpose. 2. We emphasize Education -- we are "almost neurotic" in our insistence on education. 3. We share leadership with the laity - believe in the priesthood of all believers. 4. Ethical issues are dealt with in all their complexity -- abortion, sexuality, and poverty 5. Seek to transform the culture by being in dialogue, making judgments and asking for accountability.

PASTORAL VOCATION (Eugene Peterson) Tells of a time when he inadvertently told about "getting pregnant at Christ our King Presbyterian Church" and was speaking metaphorically -- A kind of uncensored statement in a sermon about the gospel being conceived in the life of a person. The kids turned it into a banner and put it on the back of his Dodge Van so that all the next day he drove around town with the sign showing --- "I got pregnant at Christ our King Pres. Church. Two ways Eugene learned the faith: singing it in the songs and listening to his mother tell the stories of the bible like they were alive on TV.

Two things must stand at the center of the pastoral life: God and the passion for God. These were 2 things that he had observed in his mother. We are often polite but indifferent.

The church often moves into "golden calf country" with its emphasis on: entertainment, consumerism, and the demand for MBO where we do not need God.

Report to the G.A. on the first page there were check marks about members, attendance, and money. Then on the back pages he had to write a narrative. Decided that nobody ever read that so he began telling about fornicating, having an affair, becoming an alcohol problem and he never heard a word from the G.A. Then he met with them under some circumstance -- Did you read my report? (Yes) Why did you not respond to my desperate situation?

EUGENE'S SEMINARY REQUIREMENTS 1. Creative Plagiarism so you must point them to the best sermons available; 2. Voice Control -- shift it 2 or 3 decibels with a Scottish accent; 3. Office Management -- answer mail in a week, phone within 24 hours, empty the desk and look organized; 4. Image Projection -- the core is to learn how to respond to appearance rather than substance. Name drop, He thought all of this was a joke until he began seeing adds for all of these skills.

WORKING THE ANGLES (Peterson) We need to pay attention to God in the act of doing ministry: prayer, scripture, and spiritual direction. 1. Prayer -- act of paying attention to God within. 2. Scripture -- act of paying attention to God in history; 3. Spiritual Direction paying attention to God in the person before us. "Nobody ever asks me about my prayer, attention to scripture or my spiritual direction." We have reversed the Copernican Revolution: "Made the earth the center of our focus!" (Wrote 10 books before he got one published.)

SEMINAR ON WORKING THE ANGLES Here is an outline of a workshop I did for clergy using the ideas that I got from Peterson.

I. Attention to Scripture A. Medium of God -- where we learn "Godspeech" What does it say, what does it mean for us now. Sidetracked by historical and other critical approaches -- Brueggemann. B. Engaging God -- Illustrate what it would look like if we should begin to focus on text.

II. Prayer 1. Begins with an awareness of or interest in or concern about God. (think of the analogy of being in love -- the loved one gets your attention. and interest. ) 2. Discernment of awareness -- attending and extending; 3. Fear of self in the course of prayer

III. Spiritual Direction ("soul cure") A. Define the tope, refer to Holmes, Edwards etc. 2. Practically it means 1) knowing people and 2 ministry about spiritual guidance. 3. Roles of the Director Prince, Friend, Leader, Artisan of Time and Life.

WHAT IS THE CHURCH FOR? DIE BEFORE I WAKE I heard Bill Gillespie, black minister in St. Louis talk about that from a black man's point of view. Bright young black asked him what the church is for. Took him into the sanctuary and showed him the banners: Loving, Giving, Caring, Serving.

DRIVEN TO PRAYER I met Bryan McDonald on a flight to St. Louis. He is an employee benefits expert with a British company. He was warm and friendly and I asked him about his work. Finally, the subject turned to religious faith. His mother was a Methodist and his father a Presbyterian. But he himself was not religious, he said. In England the priest has moved over for the "Pub" which is the center of the village and the place of conversation and community.

His mother was dying and he confessed, "I confess I prayed. I told my children to think positively or anything they could do if it would help." Does not go to church and sees very little value in the church. His children get religion in the schools like they get information on all the other subjects they study.

FOUR ILLEGITIATE CHILDREN Jim Andrews was seeking to build community and to share a fact that no one in the group would know. He said, "Four illegitimate children bear my name." Stone silence. Then he said that he worked as a chaplain at a Florence Crittenten home for unwed mothers and a number of pregnant girls thought a name that no one had ever heard of would be great for their sons.

TURN ON THE LIGHTS Joanna Adams went to North Decatur Presbyterian. and found that the sanctuary lights were dim and that people could hardly see when they came to worship. She talked with the janitor about it; He showed her another light switch. "Turn it on we have been worshipping in 1/2 light long enough and we didn't even know it!"

CHURCH GROWTH NOT DEATH Under the preaching of an old pastor the church was dying . He was heavy on issues every Sunday. Friend said, "Life is hard enough, I don't need to go and be reminded of my guilt every week." Joanna took in 120 members in a year whereas 15 or 20 before. Got a Yuppie or two. One guy came because he heard they had a minister who wore a skirt -- lots do, black. When visitors came they entered a dark, dismal group with no spirit. Central to the growth and renewal is 1. A vision of the church's mission; and 2. A vital worship service. Now that church is packed to overflowing and the life of the Spirit is evident. Balanced in vision and work, not just a one party line.

CHURCH LIKE THE ATLANTA BRAVES Walter pointed out to me that when we used to go to the ball game the Braves had an Indian with a brown wooden head; 2. the creature with a red costume who did handstands, music for the other generation, four dancers with red, white, and blue 5. singers, and this is not to mention the beer, peanuts, and hot dogs. "When you don't have a team, you must have a diversion to make the people believe they had a good time!" Is the church like that? Strange. After winning the pennant for 3 years, they don't have that extra stuff. Don't need it.

CHURCH CHANGES Don Stein went to St. Mary's. The area had phenomenal growth. A new sub base came in and in the previous year the church grew from 70 to 180 members. He was very effective in blending the two groups together. Added new elders, Created excitement. A newsletter to keep the people informed. He made them a session and not the board of directors. New fellowship hall. Had a mother's morning out as a service. At the core of this growth is a change in context and a joyful change of vision for the church. It can happen!

CENTRAL TASK OF MINISTRY Tom Lewis attended a seminar in Austin. One evening he decided to go out for solitude and to think about his ministry. "As I sat in Austin it occurred to me that the central task of a minister is helping people get related to God." The hermeneutical principal of pastoral ministry that interprets all the other tasks. Yet most of us clergy come from seminary without preparation for this most central task. We know how to do everything else but get folk related to God.

GOD ON THE TRAIL I met a young black man in Indianapolis. We were flying back to Atlanta where he was headed for N. C. A&T. He was a major in marketing and was playing basketball and football. With respect to religion he was not too active. A good person slips in the church to eat once in a while. He said that a lot of folk were not real and pointed to Baker and Swaggart. He confessed that he was really agnostic. I said, "I want you to know Christ's way is a great adventure; he really wants the best for you but I wonder if you have the courage to risk your life into his hands." He: "You know the last time a person mentioned Christ to me was a nun –a teacher-- in Norfolk." John, the Lord seems to be after you today. What do you think you will do about that?

ANTIQUE CHURCH There was an old church on the east side of U.S. 31. In the tower was one word: "Antiques” and I wondered if hat was a parable of my church.

NEED FOR A GUIDE. On the West side of #31 there is a Dairy Queen that advertises itself to be the largest in the world. What is the ill. Perhaps, you were passing a significant land mark and didn't know it unless someone point it out to you.

INACTIVE CHRISTIAN I met this young man on the way to Charlotte. He was going to work as a carpenter. He had flunked out of the University of Tennessee. His dad was a contractor and so he had to get a job to make enough money to finish school. Had gone 2 years and 1/2 year credit. He was not too serious about religion believes in God Christ etc. but "I guess I'm an inactive Christian."

GIFT NOT A GIFT A gift received is to be a present for others. "You meant it for evil but God meant it for good." Wade Huie said it.

PASTOR'S REMEMBRANCE FOR HIS SUCCESSOR When he left he placed 3 envelopes in the desk drawer: 1. One was marked when trouble arises; 2. When bad trouble arises; 3. When you can't take it any longer. So when they began to complain about the money and singing the old hymns the new pastor opened # it read "Blame it on me." 2) Then a woman ran off with one of the elders -- Blame it on the Denomination; 3) Finally, the criticism and tension got to him and he decided that "he couldn't take it anymore,' he opened the 3rd envelope and it said, “Write a cover letter and add it to 3 envelop and place it this drawer.”

FACING DEATH I had lunch with Joe Cochran. He knew that he had terminal cancer. "How do you live each day knowing that you have a terminal illness?" Do you talk about it easily? I cannot live without hope, he said. The doctor opened for me a little window of hope. 1. I'm not a hero; 2. I alternate between fighting and accepting; 3. live one day at a time and value each moment of the day that I live. 4. Much less frantic about work, in fact, not frantic at all. 5. I have chosen to be a cancer patient and not a cancer victim. Daily Joe prayed like this from the liturgy of the church: "Teach us to live so we won't be afraid to die and show us how to die so we won't be afraid to live."

OUTREACH IS REAL Bob Kelly of Tulsa told me the story of supplying a Western PA. Church for visitation in evangelism. In a small church he had a dozen persons who would visit. He asked the congregation for the names of their neighbors. At night he visited and asked the members to visit. In their visits they asked two questions: 1. Do you believe Jesus Christ is Lord? 2. Would you like to become a member of a church where people believe this? First night those they visited gave them names of their friends and they visited them the second night. In two weeks the church of 108 received 54 new persons. Why? "Nobody ever asked them if they believed and wanted to belong before."

HISTORY AND PROMISE I always liked what Joe Cochran said, "When you build on the promise of God, you have history as a base but it always points to the future."

CRADLE ROLL PRESBYTERIAN? Are you, asked Jerry Shelburne, No! "I didn't think so. You don't talk like one. Afterwards I asked him, were you? No, I was born Assembly of God and there were 3 of us in the class at Louisville.

ELDER PREACH When Alex Davis went to Kenya, Africa and as soon as they arrived they were told that they would be preaching the next day. He said, "I don't preach." The African said, "You are an Elder aren't you? Elders out here PREACH THE GOSPEL. We will look forward to hearing you.

DEAD ALREADY. Dot Jackson told of coming from college and having a serious auto accident. She heard the man say, "Don't bother with this girl, she's already dead." But someone believed there was hope for her and took her to the hospital. She lived. She gave her life to God in gratitude.

CALL YOUR CHILDREN? Carolyn Hoyme who had joined the Presbyterian Church heard Ed Hurley preach on the reality of some of our children dropping out of church and joining non-denominational churches. She called her children and said, "Get back in your Mainline Church!" They did. I don't know if this is a prescription for everyone but it got her children back.

CALL UPON GOD I sat by Susan in Monroe at the lunch at the Country Club. She was about 30 years old and had never come to a personal faith. She realized how empty life was. She, one day, went to a nearby Episcopal Church and knelt to pray. "I have heard of you. I need help. Please help me." And she wept with lots of tears. God did. Five years later she was baptized in the Holy Spirit at home. I had asked her what had made her alive to God. She told me the story. The pastor said that she come regularly, her husband comes some. A changed, transformed person.

NOT AFRAID OF MEN I don't know why this woman in Lincoln Nebraska needed to tell me this but she did. I met her after a session, I think. I had spoken about Christmas and presents for kids. She had been attending a Bible Church -- not always because she had been reared a catholic and then Lutheran. "What does it mean I'm not afraid of men. She was a quiet person. You know what I mean, the opposite sex. Once I was so shy I could not speak to a man but now I can talk to men. "Thanks, have a good day." Was I afraid?

HEAVEN -- HELL WHATEVER I had spoken in Aptos, Cal. on the hunger for "something more" in our lives. A lady, Betty Greeley, came up to me on leaving and said, "I don't believe that hunger for something more will ever cease until we are with God or in heaven, wherever the hell that is."

CLAIROL Does she or doesn't she? Belsey was part of the ad campaign. They wanted a new slogan but all the folk at the ad agency wanted to keep the old theme. Eleanor was new and rather ballsy and she said she had an idea and they let her develop it. She photographed a nude with red hair and red public hair. She gave the company the statistics, the research, and then uncovered the nude. She offered them this line, "Mix an extra batch and have a snatch to match." They agreed to keep the old ad.

MINISTERS In church a little girl was coloring away when she suddenly looked up to her mother and asked, "Did God make minifers." Her mother thinking the 4 year old meant minister said, "Yes." Caroline said, "I though he must have because that's all he talks about God/God/God." He went on preaching and she got back to coloring (Carrie Holmes)

FOUNDATION IN CONSCIOUSNESS Earl Mullin a min in Maysville, Ky. He was reared in a Christian family and in the church. His professor in college gave him a hard test --- all about the Passover. He passed the test but turned the other way. He had success as a teacher, went to humanistic training. At one of these encounter groups he got in touch with the foundation of his life. The exercises brought it to consciousness and it began to have a life of its own. He had to change. Because of this encounter with the depth his "call" was resurrected and claimed his life -- for a while at least.

VOCATION Walter Albritton is a dear friend and minister of God. After seeing him work with people in the church his sons all chose different vocations. One chose computers (Matt), the second chose to work as an airplane mechanic (Mark) and the third chose forestry (Tim) The fourth Steve likes animals -- the ones that don't talk. Walter said there must be a message in this --- they all got as far from dealing with people as they could. (Matt eventually got transformed and became a Methodist Preacher.)

UNIVERSAL PRINCIPLES /BARRT /DAVUS began the question with "What are the ingredients of evangelism?" 1. Persons who know Christ; 2 Persons who relate to each other in community with a spirit of faith; 3. A community of vital worship of God --- fire, warmth, demonstrate love; 4. Personal outreach to a person --invite them into the fellowship to experience faith. 5. Proclamation of Christ with an invitation to participate in the BOC.

ORGANIZED CHURCH A visitation team called on a woman and at the door she said, "I don't care to get involved with the organized church." On responded, "Don't worry, ours is hardly organized at all."

PERFECT CHURCH Joanna Adam came to the corner of Georgia Ave and McDaniel Street and sitting right before her was on old church. It said "Perfect Church" and she almost ran a red light to pull into the parking lot because she had always wanted to see at least one perfect Church....

WHEN DAY DAWNS The disciple asked the Rabbi, "How can you tell when the day dawns?" Important for the Sabbath you know. It is when the fingers of light first break through the sky; is it when there is a shine on the maple tree, is it when the owl returns to its roost. NO! Day dawns when "when you have enough light to see that the person next to you is you neighbor." Needs the Love of Christ.

APATHY: IMAGES OF ... 1. Asleep, instead of awake; 2. Amnesia, can’t recall what is urgent. 3. Harlotry, man and varied lovers; 4. Dead and in need of resurrection. To be dead is to have a loss of feeling, mobility, and being. Images are progressively serious and disabling.

DEATH ESCAPE FROM Rodney Harris has been a devotee of Harry Houdini. In Appleton, Wis. they keep holding a séance on Halloween to contact the dead. Houdini promised to come back. If anyone could escape death he could. But, Houdini has not come back. Rodney keeps doing the séance to put handcuffs on him and clamp him down if he comes back.. Someone told me about the TV. show with people working with a medium shouting "Harry, Harry" But Harry did not hear, if he did, he could not answer.

CLERGY ARE IMAGE OF GOD Bonnie was speaking to bible teachers. "Laity will take it better from the laity than from the clergy." She said it jokingly but the image of God is the issue.

PREACHING RELEVANT Fosdick said, "Not many persons will knock your door down to ask about the Hittites or the hear sermons about the Jeubisites."

BIBLE Important book I hard Ralph Lewis talk about Oil and the future of the world because of it. He said, "My grandmother was a Welch woman from the farm. She always said the two most important books in the world were the Bible and a Sears Roebuck Catalogue. One tells you how to get to heaven and the other helps you enjoy the trip. But don't get confused with which is which.

CONFESSION CHILD/DAUGHTER Annie called C.J. Burleson April 1 a year ago. "I'm an alcoholic." A year later she came home and said I want you to give me my 1 year pin. I thank you for what you have done for me. I knew you were religious but I didn't believe in God. "God told me to call Annie and go to AA with her. "I’m sorry for all I have done; I am taking step number 5 and making a moral inventory and confession of my life."

LISTEN: NOT WILLING TO; RESISTENCE Knowledge, challenge, face to face. Ledon Sheets said to C.J. "Come in Burley and lets talk about where we have been." Le Don had spent more time in jail for Jesus than most anyone he knew. But burley rejected the invitation and left. "I didn't want to listen. I might be convinced and I did not want to change.

DID MY BEST Judy Shane, a former Nun from Iowa. She was one of 9 catholic children. Was in the order for 22 years. She wrote graffiti on a nuclear sub and waited to be arrested. Judy said "If we were to have a nuclear holocaust, I want to look back and feel that I have done all that I could have done." (Maybe we need a new kind of fundamentalism, doing what we believe God has called us to do. Jesus is a "peace-maker" "What did he say, "cheese maker."

RELATION WITH GOD How does God relate to us. 1. Absentee Land-lord who has a governor he sends a preacher or bishop; 2. Owner who has an overseer whom he himself audits with a few unexpected appearances; 3. One with the Land and one and the same to tend the land, to serve God. Owner who lives on the land, camera and a visual. Has ear plug and owner monitors all actions.

CHALLENGE I found in Richard Scoggins a real pastor. He wanted unity, change, and gave support to people. He told me that Mary would be in church. He spoke of her 2 marriages, 2 abortions, drugs, alcohol and her mother said, "She's coming to church.” Something happened to me when I went into the pulpit knowing that this woman was there with real and pressing needs. I preached better or different.

CHILD ABUSE, SEXUAL ABUSE Laura Peters told her daughter about a child molester. She was 16 ears old and when she heard this report it "Blew her out of the water." cried and cried. She said, 1. I feel guilty that I have judged her as weird and not been a friend to her. 2. I hate this man who has done this to her, he shouldn't have 3. I feel helpless to do anything about it; 4. And I feel confused. My feelings are flying like snow in a crystal ball. She was able at 16 to identify so many of the feelings that all of us have when we think of a person being abused and helpless. I said to her, "I admire your sensitivity and your caring. "

Thank you, I think --- How humble and uncertain she was. (I think the man was an elder in the church and that his practice of abuse had gone on for a long time.)

CALL TO MINISTRY I asked Martin Huggins "how were you called." I felt it in my heart at 12 years old. Came again at 28. Other people knew in my heart, I had the gifts he gave me. He prayed to God that God would let him finish college, farm, get married. His dad was a farmer and his mother felt he ought to be a preacher. At 35 he landed in the hospital. This was a shock that awakened him to his need for obedience to the call. He worked hard to get where he could not think.

INACTIVE MEMBER I had worked hard all day. Got up at 6:30 and drove to Cornelia. Got home and Nan said we had to visit Mrs. Easterly for her pledge. You know the end of the list are not the best pledgers. Went to her home and a child came to the door. Asked to see her mother. We are from Shallowford. "Oh, we don't go there any more. We have been shopping around and actually go to Embry Hills UMC. I guess that we have wasted your time."

"You surely have." We ought to move our membership. I agree and I hope you will do it soon. I felt guilty for my anger but as long as she belonged to Shallowford they did not have to pledge at Embry Hills.

PATHWAY TO RENEWAL Bess attended a conference. At the end she asked for guidance on what to do when she returned home. What can a displaced home-maker do to bring about renewal in her church? 1. Begin a serious walk with Christ with 1 or 2 others. 2. Pray for guidance; 3. Add to the group. 4. Dinner with new people who might be interested. 5. Form 2 groups. 6. Get an outside person to come and talk with you about renewal and growth. 7. Hold a retreat in a different place from the church. 8. Begin to conduct a Ladies Luncheon. Attract new persons and depend upon the Holy Spirit to begin transforming lives.

AM I CONVERTED? ELDERLY LADY She was so distraught. In her 70's she had been listening to TV. evangelists and was confused about her life with God. She was baptized at 12, sought to live for Christ. 1. Do you believe in Christ? Yes 2. You are saved if you believe he is Lord.

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HUSBAND LOVE RELATIONSHIP I met Bunny in Detroit. She said I have been disturbed. I married early, had four kids, sent them to college. Her husband -- her being close to him and intimate. He died. Married again and had a messy divorce. Now she has good sex, but she does not have much in common with the man to whom she is married. She still recalls her first husband and his love for her and she always will. What options are there before her? The original problem is still there...She still feels threatened by her first husband...You will fight again.

EVANGELISM STUDY LOUISVILLE SEMINARY JOHN MULDER

John Mulder lectured on the critical agenda of the PCUSA. Lilly gave money to study "The Fate of American Evangelism." Not just the PC, but the whole of mainline churches. The problem is the erosion of the Protestant ethos in the culture. In the last 20 or 30 years we have lost 1/3 of our members. The loss of members is not keeping pace with the population growth.

MALAISE we are suffering from 1.theological malaise, 2. bureaucratic malaise, 3. Congregational malaise -- on the verge of being sick. Several factors to consider: a redistribution of members; the mainline has changed, a large part of the population is religious but not members of churches. Demographics have changed. Growth of population has not been of those from which Presbyterians draw their members (Ethnics, Koreans, Asians) The Priority has changed ecumenism, social witness, sex and family, divorce, homosexuality. And these issues have not helped us in reaching out to persons in need of the gospel.

CHURCH ENDURANCE, PERSISTENCE Tom told about the installation of the new organ at our church. He heard the hammers and saws. There came a call at 9:00 saying the electricity was off .... then he goes to the church and the sound here is too loud, and there it is too soft. The men said next week we will come, cut, saw, build until we get it right. New Organ. Little boy raised his hand all through Tom's Talk to the congregation. "Will we have church next week?" (He was hoping for an off day.) With all the change, activity, and commotion, "will we have worship next week" At times in the congregation we wonder if we will have worship in the midst of the Hurley burley...

NORMS FOR MISSION "What informs what we do? 1. The Bible and Christ 2. Nature of the Church, context. 3. Leadership. 4. Context : needs, changes, resources and money and people. Remember in our discussion we will not say, "Can't do." All can't do statement will discount a person's idea. These are forbidden words. What we need then is a congregational meeting to discuss and adopt the dream : 1. membership, 2. nurture. 3. Ministry beyond ourselves. 4. System of reporting and holding ourselves accountable.

PRAYER A little girl prayed for food for Christmas and none came. Her cynical mother asked, "Did you really think God would answer your prayer?" O, yes, God did, Somebody just wasn't listening.

COMMITMENT SACRIFICE ROOM FOR JESUS In the Christmas play the Inn Keeper had just turned away Mary and Joseph and a little boy was so caught up in the pageant that he stood up and shouted, "Wait, wait, come back, you can have my room. It has a TV and everything." In that moment of heartfelt response he forgot his natural self and his gratuitous self came running out to serve.

MAKE A MOTION I heard a preacher from New York speak. I have come to make a motion, he said. He got the motion on the floor And now can I have a second? All of you who will confirm and vote for this motion say, Amen. (shouts) And Now let us go and do it.

PERSONAL I got a personally addressed letter from Westline Credit Corp. that read, "Ben C. Johnson" or current resident. If I can't reach you then anyone will do.

TIME TO PRAY Al Winn said "I felt that I always had time for lunch. I decided that if I could eat, I could pray so I decided that "Never eat lunch until I had prayed; If I had not prayed I would pray instead of eating; Have always had time to pray since I made these commitments. He goes into the sanctuary at 11:30 and no one ever goes into the sanctuary. It is a perfect place to play.

PRAYER AS A HABIT I think you can give me something said Robert Hay. My theology of reconciliation is to be Reconciled to God, to others and to self. I'm doing fine on "others" but God and self are problems. You are challenging my feelings about God. In seminary apartment there is no place for quiet, I can't get up early and I'm too tired at night.; I have set 1:30 in the chapel, only quiet place I have, went to spend 30 minutes with God and stayed 1 ¬Ω hours. Someone asked me about having a picture made at 1:30 and I said, "No I have an appointment." If I can be consistent for 21 days it will become a habit.

TIME TO PRAY SILENCE An old minister at his ordination, a pastor to his grandmother. He related how as a young minister his firs visit to an old lady in the parish. She said, "Come in and sit in that chair." Don't say anything for 25 or 20 minutes. Just sit in silence and take a little time to pray. The first time I was scarred to death but the day the lights went out I thought maybe God was there and as time went on this visit came to be my most cherished visit in the membership. (Minister named Joe Vaughn) Joe was in a church fight; being pulled back and forth. A Roman Catholic friend asked him to come over not to talk. Gave him a warm fire, rocking chair and a glass of wine. And the gift of silence in the midst of the story.

DREAM SPENT ALL I was walking toward Campbell Hall in my dream. I learned a meeting was cancelled. I said, "Well I can go eat." But a second thought came to me. Something in me said, "i don't have to eat...I am free to choose."

Second dream that night. Marv Root and I were buying a home. He could not come up with the money, he had spent everything in his money mkt. acct. I wonder if this was before he spent all in the ICR and had to be let go. 3/19/84

NEW VISION PARADIGM SHIFT David came in on my birthday in 84 to talk about his spiritual life. Hard to pray and his wife asks, "Where are you with Jesus?" He went off with 2 seminarians and came home cussing and vulgar. I need some help. 1) You were in a religious culture that was monolithic. Belief same thing and all talked alike. Reality was under control. 2. Have lived in a anew environment for 9 months. You must answer all the basic question again: Who is God; How do we relate to Persons;3 Meaning of salvation and vision of the Christian life. several answers can be given. 3. You inner experience has changed. Way to pray and live for God has been eroded with new thoughts and challenges because you are in a new place. They don't work for you now. I promise you that God is with you; cannot ever go back to where you've been when you have seen a new and better way; God will show you the best for your future. I even laid hands on him and prayed. He said, "I've never gone to anyone for spiritual help before." Interesting that this wife decided to leave him for a doctor in the church with whom she went to NYC.

WITNESS NEEDS INFORMATON NOT WELCOME IN CHURCH I met Mike Scarborough on the way from picking up my car. He was a young man with zits, tangled hair and he talked about how hard he had been working to finish cleaning a car. I just finished a book Friend Maker for God. (he asked what I did) And I really feel proud of it. From a table to a book in two years. What do you write? Religious stuff mostly. I asked, "Are you religious ?" No. I believe in God, church and that everyone sins. I try to live a clean life. Please know that God loves you, even when you don't do good. He pressed on "I went to a church but they didn't speak to me. A minister stood up and read to us a sermon. I never knew what it meant. Where ? Eastminster. He seemed quite glad that an adult listened to him and took him seriously. Not offended but grateful.

DARKNESS DARK NIGHT DOUBT I met Dorsey Ellis in Greenbrier Presbytery. Came to me 5 minutes after my lecture. Can I talk with you? Wife of 49 years died. I need support. 76 years old. He was eager to ask: 1. What happens when you die? 2. Where do you go; 3. I am not an atheist or agnostic but I cannot deny my feelings. This is the first time I have been able to cry. God seems so far away from me and I am in darkness. I assured him: God is good; He must honor faith and loyalty; He cannot ignore and puff away your dedication like a wind blowing; I have basic confidence in God. Here is a man of faith who is passing down a dark path in the nighttime of his journey. I prayed. He thanked me. I should have thanked him.

ANGER WITH GOD Her husband had been dead for 6 months. She asked me, "Is it alright to be angry with God, with the church and with everything?" Yes. For the time being go ahead and be angry.

MESSENGER OF GOD? CAROLYN ROWEN She called the seminary to talk with Dean Caruthers and told him that she had a message from God for the seminary, but he said that "Our department of evangelism takes those special delivery messages from God." She sat down in my office and talked without pause: A Street Preacher; God sent her to us; she gives out tracts; wishes to pray for the seminary; the whole church is apostate; And she said, "God told me to come." "What do you want me to do?" Seemed not to even hear so intent she was on telling her message. Then I prayed. 'Lord Jesus have mercy." There are crazies in the church and outside it.

NEEDS WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM CHURCH? I asked Jeanette Hine what she wanted. And I realize that every member should be asked: What do you want from the church. She named 8 things: direction for life; get over traumas and asking too many why's; looking for a message; church is a special place; don’t know what will help me when it will happen to me; had been in a Presbyterian Church. for 5 years and nobody asked her to join; Her experience in Ft. Lauderdale was that she was followed up on immediately and she joined. Got in the church and found her nitch. "You have something that no one else is offering to ministers."

ELDER DRUNK Ray Stover told me about this saint who was also an elder. "Pop” called on an elder who was drunk. He said: You do not know the bible; if a man came to you and asked for God you would not know what to say. The elder was right. And it helped the drunk.

INVITATION TO JOIN Ray Stover was asked to join the church by a Baptist minister named, Frank even though he had been led to Christ by a Presbyterian SS teacher weeks before. They mentioned a catechism class and that was about as near an invitation as they got.

PERMISSION TO TALK LOVE Mary Sue was very unhappy with the church -- no youth program and 8 months previous she had spent time in a clinic for depression. She began to cry. "I feel like I can talk with you." Love trust and openness give permission; I knew when I walked into the room that she wanted to talk with me. (Somehow you can sense those things.)

OBSTACKLES MOVING DIFFICULTY I had to move on the 28th day of June. The mover promised to send a truck; a relative died and he had to go to the funeral but said he would be there by 6:00. The events: mover sick, death in family; called 8 - 10 movers for the week of July 4th. After numerous delays I called 3 places to rent a truck. I was determined. So a son and his friend helped me load and unload 3 trucks of furniture. I have never been so tired. I was over-tired and could not go to sleep. I was determined.

PREJUDICDE The EP's wife said, "I came with the attitude not to like you. You are from the South, you talk funny, `I don't like groups; and I have looked for something to criticize and I can't find it. I guess you could say that is a backhanded complement." What resistance does a speaker from Georgia face? Maybe you could help her find something for which not to like me.

DUMB DEAF HEARING Morris Taylor told me about baptizing a high school coach; he wanted a child. Son born and they thought he was retarded. Then they discovered that when he was 6 years old, he was deaf. Got him a hearing aid and this child is brilliant.

SHARE YOUR FAITH Martha Davis in Chattanooga had a son. Mark was sick all his life. She went to every offbeat hospital in the country to get him treated. Then she went to Augusta and met a girl, just been told her daughter would die because she had a water head. Could leap from a window. She resolved never to miss her church again. In N. Y. she met a young woman on valium who was just out of a mental hospital. She was sweet to Mark. Then she gave him a blue sweater. Martha said, "Do you believe in God? No. There is no God. No one cares for me. Yes, he does. Martha promised to pray for her -- had a friend who was on Valium, Charlene. For 5 years she prayed and wrote to this woman. Got in a bible study group. Recently got married. Showed me a picture.

BEARING THE CROSS -- Trust -- Sue Armstrong, moved to Rockford Illinois to care for her husband's mother, got tired because she was not equipped for the task. In a couple of years she discovered that she had cancer. Still tired. Began to turn toward God. Had cancer surgery and felt they got it al. Free of symptoms until 5 years later. Then it came back on her and she was on medication. She was surprised that she was not "frightened" and sometimes she slips into her own spirit and becomes weak. I have pain. When I cough, I wonder what it means. Hips and legs in lots of pain. "I'm not courageous, I'm a wimp!" I can give myself to God and I can trust. You let me tell my story! and I'm telling my story differently. I feel confident!

DOUBT "An Anglican is a man who believes with his whole heart and doubts with his whole mind." Archbishop of Canterbury. I said, "There must be a place for me here." This was the statement of a man who was reared as a Jehovah’s witness in Phenix City, Ala. Now attends Peachtree Church.

SERIOUS DOUBT I had breakfast with Larry. He was a lawyer who had attended Princeton Seminary. Now an American Baptist. As we talked he raised all the questions of Theodicy. Do you ever have times when you think religion is stupid? No God there after all? How do you deal with questions, serious questions like this? I suppose there are three ways: 1. Apologetics -- a rational argument for the existence of God. Question of meaning is a rational question and it is the question about God. 2. Inner discovery -- I think we can look, ask for lenses to see the tracks of God in our own history and with the right glasses we can occasionally discern it. 3. Commitment. It is true that we can never know the reality of God in detachment. This detached speculation contradicts the divine epistemology. "We have to risk to know."

SACRAMENTAL CLEANSING -- "Cast out the demons." Tom Beason came to a church in Florida where there had been a minister who acted without discretion. The members wanted to cleanse the temple and cast out demons. "What do you think?" He seemed hesitant. Then he told me -- "The former minister had shared with the elder that he had had intercourse with the Financial Secretary in the whole church. They made a game of finding a new and different place where they had not had sex. The final place in which he had sex was in the pulpit. "Even an old salt like me gasped at the thought of it. Yes, I think you need an exorcism. So he had to develop a liturgy for the beginning of his ministry in this place. A sacramental cleansing for the house of God! But demons are strange creatures. This minister had to leave the church because of his affair with a member of the congregation.

The tragic ending to this story is the fact that this minister wound up having an affair with a woman in the church. Maybe he did not cast the demons out of the right thing!

PREACHING WITH FEELING. I dreaded to watch the taper of the student preacher. I missed the original presentation and had to catch it on video. It was a Korean Student and while I appreciate the effort to learn a second language, it is sometimes hard to her what they say and mean. I listened to this sermon that I had missed. In the midst of the sermon I found myself being drawn into the moment. He captured my attention. He had something magnetic, stirring, and powerful. He was in that moment a mediator of the holy in a way that I could not ignore. I turned to Nan and said, "This man has a feel for preaching. He constantly brings us back to God." It is a gift, a sixth sense, an openness to the HOLY. Such a contrast with many of the sermons that I have suffered through.

UNWITTING EVANGELISTS Miles and Eileen Crooms were the youth directors at First PC in Lexington NC. They took Arnold in and cared for him like he was there 7th child. I told Eileen, "You were evangelists to Arnold." "No!" We didn't know how to be evangelists. "You loved him, didn't you?" Yes. I did love him and tears swelled her eyes. "A man never forgets those who love him." No he doesn't.

CHAPLAIN KKK Joe Solomon came out of church and introduced himself to me. "I'm the chaplain of the KKK. I minister to all my brothers, even my black brothers with aids." I didn't know what to say. "I'm glad. I'm sorry. Why?" I stood there speechless. He must have known that I was without words because he followed me to the car and pulled out his KKK card. Then he said it, "You seemed stunned like you didn't believe me."

CHURCH IN HOME. In Beaufort, SC we passed a church on . 11th avenue in Port Royal. "They're living in the church." Persons who live in the church leave it everyday to go to work but they come home to the church in the evening. They dine in the church, sleep in the church and have their whole life in the church. This is what I mean about the Christian life--live, work, sleep, eat, and breathe the Church because the church is about our whole life.

VALUES Bumper sticker: "I spent all my money on boats, booze, and broads and the rest I wasted."

REFORMED TRADITION (Louis Weeks) The Reformed Tradition expresses the truth as found in all the creeds -- Apostles, Nicean, and the Lord's prayer. The themes that keep reappearing are: 1. an emphasis on scripture; 2. on the sovereignty and grace of God 3. sanctification. To be a Christian is to change personally, socially, economically, politically. We are an ethical people.

A "CHRISTER” A Christmas and Easter Christian. Keri told of a woman dying with cancer. She was not Christian. Visited, talked, and had prayer with her. "It is wonderful she said, you're right. Thank you." She had a dream in which God himself came to her: "You were right. What you did was good." The next day the family called to thank her. It came about 15 minutes before she died. She was liberated because the Lord had told her that she had done the thing that a minister should do.. (She read scripture; prayed wit her, guided her in prayer. Read Romans 8:1, 37-38 but she felt guilty from her CPE training. Feared she had imposed her own thoughts and will upon this woman. (Why can’t ministers use the basic tools of their calling?)

FEAR OF PRESSURE IN EVANGELISM Bob Richardson who was a religious education in Philadelphia had for three months been evaluating the class in evangelism. Finally, things came to a head for him in his first verbatim. "Felt he could work with groups but not with individuals." Why? As a kid a witness got him in a booth at Mc Donald’s and would not let him out until he said the right words. "I don't wish to ever do that to anyone." Finally I was able to help him see that we were together in that kind of witnessing. How many have old images that will not let them see even the truth of God in human communication.

IMAGES Keri said I was so nervous "I was wearing my clothes out from the inside." "Gave up Christian Brothers wine because it was not truly sacramental.

She chose Blue Nun. Pastor dreamed he went to sleep on his feet while he was preaching and when he woke up, he had. A dull sermon that puts the speaker to sleep.

PASTOR'S DREAM Pastor dreamed he went to sleep on is feet while he was preaching and he woke up and sure enough he had. Dull sermon. You what a dull sermon is? One in which the preacher goes to sleep. You heard abut the pastor who dreamed that he went to sleep on his feet while preaching and he had!

TOKEN FOR COMMUNION I visited a church in Grove City, Pa in which a man had been denied a communion token for a Presbyterian Communion because he went to worship at UMC church. A friend vouched for him. "He did not know what he was doing; he went when he was drunk." They understood and said, "Oh well if that was the case, we'll give him a token.. (Found in the recoreds of the PCUSA in Grove City.)

YOU A CHRISTIAN? I went to the Deli in Detroit. It was on the Gold concourse, across from McDonalds. The gregarious black behind the counter said, Smoked Turkey. No, ham and cheese. "You from the South?” “Georgia." How did you know? "I could feel that southern hospitality coming out of you." I had a girl friend from the south. She made me feel like a king, man I miss her. I like people who are warm and real.!" I said, "You sound like a Christian!" He turned to me with a big wink, 'You got that right BIG MAN."

PRESBYTERIAN APPRENTICE. John Leith said, "You have to be traditioned for three generations to be a true Presbyterian." Why do I wish to join your when I'll always be a second-class citizen in your kingdom. "I've wondered that myself for myself."

BAD INSTRUCTIONS. Sometimes you get there anyway. Doug Hix asked me, "How do you get to Trinity Church?" Right on Howell Mill--go all the way to the church. When I went to the Baccalaureate, I realized that I had told him wrong. It is not Howell Mill but Moore's Mill. Will he ever get there, I wondered. When I arrived I saw that he was already there. “Did you get lost." I came like you told me and came right to the church. He followed the wrong directions correctly and got where he was going anyway! There is hope for all people.

Bar-B-Cue -- "Billy” I first met him at Spice Right BBQ and had him serve the CTS Faculty. I told him to tell my guests about winning the First Prize at the Stone Mountain Cook Off. After the party I said, "It is hard to deal with success." Even harder than dealing with failure. "Ben, I love you. I'm going to adopt you as my father. Just a little time and compassion made a connection and he responded. How many folk are out there waiting for someone to be interested in them and love them? What was his pain? He had left the restaurant that night in a huff with the other owner. His wife had said to him that his partner was taking too much credit for the success of the business.

ANDY YOUNG -- "Throw me out of the UN." Andy Young told us at the Commencement that if I could ever find the truth and tell it so that it could be understood that they would probably throw him out of the church. They didn't tell me that they would throw me out of the United Nations.

ANDY'S SPIRITUALITY In Seminary he read "Testament of Devotion" by Thomas Kelly. He came to the chapter on "Holy Obedience." Felt if he followed the Spirit in obedience that the Spirit would lead him to his place. Never had an idea of where his life would lead. Led him to Angola, Southern Christian Leadership, ML King and Mayor of Atlanta.

A LONG TIME Once there was a writer whose father liked to tell stories. He liked to tell them about insects -- ants, talking ants and other animals but his favorite was a story about a lumberyard. Wife would always say, "Tell ‘em about the lumber yard." He would begin, "A man came to the lumber yard for wood. I want some 4x2's. The foreman said, "You mean 2x4's? No! Let me ask my associates to be sure. Yeah. It is 4x2's. How long do you want them? "I want them for a long time! because this building has got to be quality.

I'LL BE YOUR MOTHER After the "Meet the Master in the mountains" (a retreat hosted by Columbia Seminary at Montreat in the Spring of the year) Virginia Parish said, "I love you; I am so proud of you." I know that your mother would say that to you if she were able to and could. (My mother was in a nursing home with Alzheimer’s) And if you will let me, I'll say it to you in her behalf. What a sensitive soul, what a gift of love!

JESUS FORGIVES Betty H. from Central, Ga. I only have 20 minutes. I came from First Church Atlanta and Queens College in Charlotte. After two years I got pregnant. I dropped out of college and got married. Now I have 4 kids in 5 years. Twelve years ago I had a complete emotional break. I went to the Psychiatrist weekly, took lots of medication. But I feel real bad about something. Pregnancy?

"No, an affair." I had an affair with an Elder in our church (Fred) I broke it off. He takes out his anger on my son who works for him." I have talked with my husband and he knows I don't want us to be friends as couples. I haven't told him about the affair. I don't want him to know. I said, "Christ will forgive you." "I know but I keep feeling so badly about my sin." Latere as she She was saying good bye, she said, "Jesus died for my sin...He forgives me." A smile of gratitude broke upon her face."

SAME NAME/SAME FAMILY Betty Redman spoke of her three children. They are all very different but they have the same last name --- Redman. The Church is like that. We are all different but we have the same last name -- Christian!

MARKED FOREVER --- STEROTYPE. Arnold was a classmate of Tom Are's. He was at the hospital waiting for Jean to return from surgery. He was taking care of their 18-month-old son. He was an energetic, hyperactive kid who was driving his father nuts. They went outside on the balcony, which was 25 feet above the concrete landing below. Little Arnie ran up to his father. He said to his son, "If you don't settle down I'm going to throw you over this rail." Playfully, he grabbed him up held him over the rail and accidentally dropped him. He struggled, twisted, and Arnold lost his grip on him. He will always be remembered as the "man who dropped his son over the railing." Thomas the Apostle is marked with the same kind of stereotype. Even if he said, "let us go and die with him,” even if he confessed "my Lord and my God,” and even if he were a missionary to India, he is still recalled as Thomas the doubter.

CHURCH SHOOTS THE WOUNDED Beason said, "I was warned before I entered the church that it always shoots its wounded."

BEING WITH A LOSER Larry Doby came to the big leagues. He was to be a big hitter but he kept striking out. After a dozen or so he was getting down on himself. Joe Gordon, a 400 hitter, came over and sat down by him. Larry went on to become one of he leading outfielders. He told this story and said, "All that year I picked up Joe Gordon's glove and the beginning of each inning." You don't forget it when someone stands by you when you are a loser.

FAITH IN LIFE. P. S. Jacob had lunch with Jimmy Carter. After two hours he saw him as a practicing Christian around the world. "How did you keep your faith alive as a busy President of the U. S., the busiest man in the world. Carter said, I tried to make every decision in the light of my faith." Began with a smile. "Every decision in the light of my faith." Application of faith to politics without mixing faith and politics.

HANG UP ON LOVE. Jeff was a social worker at the Atlanta Psychiatric Institute. He walked across the room to the great atrium and the bedrooms off to the side. Came up on a person with head down, teeth clenched, tears filling her eyes. "What’s the matter?" I got up enough courage to call my mother to say, "I love you." And she hung up. What do I do now? Don't hang up on love. Don't ever. Sometimes a still voice inside says, "let up on yourself, give yourself a break, don't hang up. Do it. He traveled a 1000 miles and I never left the room.

FAITH AND FEAR A friend visited an 88-year-old man. He was a Presbyterian minister and so he felt safe. When he left he did not know whether to pray or not. "It was a hard call to make as to whether to pray." Finally, he said, "God bless this old man on the way out and the young man on the way in." God gave me new courage through this experience: "A step of faith is a step of fear."

AN AROMA Arnold and I were at Service Merchandise. I had sprayed myself with all the after-shave and the cologne. Arnold said, “What do I smell; who just passed by?” I said it is I. "You smell like a whore in Church. Get away from me.

POOR PRODUCTION Man was hired to paint lines on the road. The first day he painted 3 miles, the second 2, and the third only 1. On the fourth he called in and fired. The supervisor said, Why the reduction from 3 to 2 to 1? "Each day I got further from the can!" Where is the can that we must get closer to? Church, Bible, Heart. We must carry it with us.

ONE WITH CHRIST H. A. Williams: "God is inviting me to discover him no longer as another alongside me but as my own deepest and truest self. He is calling me from the experience of meeting him to the experience of finding my identity in him. --- I can't see, he is my eyes....hear him because he is my ears....If I appear to be alone it is because he is within me." IMPORTANT

SPEAK WITH POWER Mrs. Jack Eldridge said, "You spoke with such power. It was frightening. I am so moved, so much is going on that I can't go to church." What does this mean in a person's life. 1. That the holy was present? 2. That I was being too negative and not affirming? 3. That my new self is more deeply in touch with those personal issues in our lives. Lord is your Spirit acting through me in new ways? I do feel in touch with my spirit and your holy spirit.

PIETY Dick Junkin says, "If you tear out the pages in church history which deal with piety, there is not much left." "If you thought about piety 15 or 20 minutes you would be an expert because you are 20 minutes ahead of everyone else." I got into dialogue with my elders about piety and they said to me, "You folks (ministers) have royally screwed things up."

GOD IN LIFE. Greta Reed finally said, "O. K God, I give up. What do you want me to do?? I went to a catholic sister and told her, "I am in a mess. I need spiritual direction. She agreed. Only much later did I recognize God in those events of my life."

GOD AND ANDREW PURVIS In his Adolescence Andrew had an experience of something to enter his life. He felt that it was something transcendent. It was like God said to him, "I'm here and I'll be back." Nothing much happened for several years. His Mom asked, What's wrong? I just want to be left alone. At age 19 he said, "I’m bored with life." Mom said, "Why don't you go to church? This felt strange because she didn’t go to church. He went to church. "In minutes I knew that I was called to me a minister of God." Strange......

RUN ON EGO Tom Bagley said that two years into the parish he ran out of gas. He had been running on his own ego. In about 2 years it all fell apart. "I felt empty, angry, and prayerless. Angry about evangelism and resistant to his teacher. We had a talk at Kelly and he came on a retreat. He wrote: "I reviewed my life and had a deeper sense of calling." Mary D. Alessio came to our church and introduced us to healing as a permanent part of our ministry. My own awakening came when I went back to my disciplines and began to pray.

HOLY SPIRIT IMAGES In the Celtic Tradition there are two images of the Holy Spirit: 1. Dove, peace and comfort; 2.Wild Goose -- the unexpected, uncontrolled energy of the Holy that sometimes breaks out into a community and our personal lives. The worship group at IONA is called the Wild Goose Worship Community.

Eugene Street After lunch I went back to UVA hospital where Gene was in his last weeks of life. I said a few things to him, "I am sorry that this has happened to you; I love you and I will miss you lots." Gene said that he was not afraid to die, but I feel pain for those who are seeing me suffer. Decided to go home to die. His concerns were for Jackie, the 12 year old, and getting to the end. Getting there. (Gene died 12/31/90 He was 47 years old. His wish was granted. He was a gentleman, a prince of the Spirit. He knew no way to go but to commit himself to the Lord and to trust in God's mighty power. At his funeral I spoke on the woman who anointed Jesus' feet.

GENE'S FUNERAL Mark 14:3-9 In 40 years I never read this at a funeral. Describe the woman, the Pharisee, Disciples and Jesus response to them. She was a character, unexpected, intrusive and rude. But Jesus understood love, wild spontaneous love. A paradigm, a symbol, a sacrament. She represents the Holy Spirit, the feminine aspect of God. Anointed him for his burial, his death. Last Act of God before the resurrection. I applied this to Gene -- faith, surrender, two hard things. He said to me, "Your friendship has been one of the treasurers of my life."

DONT PLAY THE PIANO At 5:30 a.m. I established my place in the lobby of the Hilton to write Disciple 404. All was well until 7:30 and a 75 year old piano man sits down at the Grand and begins to play chords. I am irritated beyond description. Why? Go away! He left and I was relieved. But he returned in 20 minutes to serenade me again. He stops and a one armed man said, "Why are you quitting just when I came to listen?"

CHURCH FAILED YOU I was running late for a meeting the day that Doug picked me up on the limo. We go into a conversation about business, why I was in Chicago and finally religion. Do you go to church very much? Not much when I do I go to the full gospel or the central gospel fellowship. But I'm really a Lutheran. Is the Lutheran Church failing you, I asked. "No I'm not taking time to read, pray, and do my walk." I shifted to the front seat of the Limo. "Why do you think this is so?" Don't know business or something else. But, you know, I miss it. I miss the fellowship and close feelings. I went through a divorce about 3 years ago and I've never been the same since then.

HOUSE OF DIVORCE I met Terry somewhere and he told me about the house on Azalea Circle. "We call it the house of divorce," he said. There have been three couples to live in that house and all of them have ended up in divorce. The last one was the Krample family. O, I said, my daughter married one of the boys and they're divorced. Is the house contaminated? Besides I lived directly across the street from that house when I got a divorce. Can I blame my failure on the divorce house?

SEEKING GUIDANCE I first met Chris at the board meeting. He has a job with Dick de Voss and part time with a British Company. He is looking for God's will for his life. He told me that he had rejected going to a mainline church. He feels restless, looking for God's will, and I think it was providence that we met. Gave him the feedback that his feelings seem to me to be indicative of God's action in his life. Do not rush the Spirit, listen and test your intuitions because part of the discernment is in the listening and testing. I feel strongly that part of the prep for the call is the testing and proving the mind of God.

SECULAR EVANGELISTS If the church will not ordain evangelists and set them free to do the work of Christ, then industry will begin ordaining evangelists for their work. Mr. Viktor Grabner is one of the growing high-tech devotees who are company ordained evangelists. He works for Microsoft Corp but Electronics for Imaging and Apple Computer also have their own evangelists. "The marketing messiahs believe word of mouth will be the medium of the '90s. Consumers are turning to the people they trust to give them information and then let them decide. One man says it is a concept that is quite correct and quite right for the 90's. "Technically they're right in using the word, says Victor Nelson, exec assistant to Billy Graham. The term can refer to anyone promoting anything -- any product in the marketplace." What it means is the sharer of "good news” and that is what the hawker of any product thinks he is doing.

KOINONIA What is it? Pat Alexander said, "Koinonia is born of the Spirit through a shared life and a shared task." This is the model for the Spiritual Enrichment Week. The task is the call and the life is our oneness in Christ. This is a model for ministry in the church.

INVITATIONS John Furman interviewed all the Thompson scholars and to a person each felt embarrassed to give an invitation at the close of the sermon. Invitation baggage: 1. Not saw-dust trail revival; 2 Not hot gospel fundies; not manipulators of emotions; "It makes me feel uncomfortable. I know the new order of worship contains it but i do not know how to do it." Our image is that we preach to believers, the baptized. Lack clarity about developmental of spiritual life.

Worship is a place where we regularly re-decision our lives. Issues to deal with in the invitation are: image, type of invitation in the faith or into the faith, theology of decision, and follow-up to a decision.

***Use of imagination to see an alternative world and an alternative lifestyle.

WHO IS IN CONTROL? There was a tragic wreck with 6 persons killed. police came. He began to talk to the only survivor, a monkey. What went wrong the police asked? Gave signals Man drinking. Woman Talking, Children Fighting. Well What Were Your Doing? Driving.

ASSIMILATION The model for understanding the relation with a stranger in the church is the parent child relation. Bonding does not always occur. They/we change and thus become strangers again. What we offer is safety for persons to grow, change, and ask questions. The church must become a safe place for persons on a dangerous journey.

FINDING OURSELVES WHERE WE STARTED G. K. Chesterton tells about the person who sailed off to the sun. Through the storm and fog they sailed until finally he hit some sort of an island. Planted the British Flag and claimed the land for the Queen. Soon he realized that he had planted the flag on English soil. He discovered what he had left behind. We are like that. (Boomers are paper-clipped together. No glue in the marriage or the life.)

FALSE ADVERTISING Man went down the street and read a sign in the window: "Pants Pressed Here!" Took of his pants and was standing there in his underwear when the owner came in: "No, no we don't press pants, we sell signs." Do we make Christians in the church or sell signs or labels.

WITNESS TO A STRANGER To of my students joyously met me in the parking lot. We have something to tell you. Sam and I went to the Hawks game on Marta. Most riders were black. Separated and talked to a man. I asked his idea about God. He talked freely and eagerly. Then he turned to Aaron and asked, "Why do you want to be a pastor?" Made me aware that I had better be able to tell my faith story. How many of us need this?

SEEKING GUIDANCE A young man who was a member of Signal Mountain was interested in CTS (Columbia Theological Seminary). Had a traditional church experience and saw himself as a fence sitter. Had gone to the PCA and they led him to a clear decision for Christ. Had been to Labri in France, London, Washington DC and C. S. Lewis Institute to seek God’s will for his life. Wants to be totally dedicated to the Lord. God has been at work in this young lawyer’s life. 1. If you go PCA it will eventually become oppressive; 2. If you come to CTS you will be challenged but broadened; 3. I will meet you in a weekly group to give you support. I felt sad when I thought what might happen to him at CTS.

LET UP ON YOUR SELF. Sue Denis. She was from Ohio. A woman of great faith. Began talking about difficulties over the past year --surgery, not playing tennis, not even walking. "I experience God through my body she said. But my body is not working very well. "What is God saying? Thru the delay and the suffering? "I believe God is in everything. I surrendered completely when my husband's transplant came but I just can't do it here." I said: 1. I believe you are being too hard on yourself -- punishing yourself. Let up; 2. You teach LD children and how many times do you repeat the message for them? Do you get angry with them? Is not God at least as gracious as you are?

There is something for us to learn in the silence. It is the waiting and the silence that teaches us! One of the things I have lost my therapist who let me ask the same questions over and over and gave the same hard answers! (Sue had a frozen shoulder, therapy for a year before they did an x-ray and discovered a bone spur. All therapy had worked against the spur.

HEAVEN AND HOME Fran Dreitzer from Alliance Ohio came up immediately after my first talk. She rehearsed her husband’s illness and death to a complete stranger. She wanted to retell all the details. I knew how important it was for her to get her story straight. While in a nursing home holding her husband, he said: "Stepping on the shore I knew it was heaven, Taking a hand I felt it was God's, Breathing new air, I found it was celestial, I'd waked up in glory and I knew I was home."

GOING HOME Pan McElroy told of a young man in her 40's with cancer. They prayed for his healing. Became obvious he was not going to be healed. He said, "I have to go home." 12 or 14 friends stood around the bed. Pam gave him permission to go on home. His wife said to him that it was OK for him to let go of life. He stated that he was at peace, his face showed it and he said I see the light before me and the friends sang and celebrated as he stepped into the light of the other side and was gone.

OUT OF CONTROL David Bowerman related how he and some busybodies found an empty able spool; they played with it, found ways to slow it down by fouling it, forcing it to roll over obstacles. Decided to move it to another boys yard. So happened there was a long hill on the way. But they had the matter in hand with their rocks and sticks. At the bottom of the hill there was a busy road. But as they had not properly calculated the force of gravity and the steepness of the hill, all their efforts to slow the spool down came to naught. One chock, then another but it did not slow down. Got faster and faster, tried to curb it but it bounced back and kept on rolling. David look up and saw all the fellows running for cover. But he was curious. So he stood there and watched the spool roll down the hill. MIRACLE no car was coming and it bounded across the busy street. Hit a bank bounced harmlessly into the road. A driver went over and moved it. Later they sneaked down and recovered the runaway spool. How do we recover a run away life?

NATIVE AMERICANS LESSON Dr. Elizabeth Welch is an octogenarian, 85 when I met here. Ph. D. from Northwestern University. Wrote of her father going to Oklahoma to begin a church. She was reared and schooled with Indians. Learned three lessons from them: 1. Value of family -- life is in the tribe. sacrifice for each other, suffer for each other, hang on. 2. Respect for the Creation and the Environment. 3. A personal relation with the Creator. My father was a minister and taught me. My parents were like God. I have sought and found a personal relationship with God. (All three spring from the same source and are related to each other.)

UNIFIED SELF Mary Virginia described how she as divided into many selves and they competed with each other. She was given a vision of her 7 selves: wife, mother, civic, religious, working, neighbor And from that day of vision, she has found her life made whole in Christ.

PRAYER'S IMPORTANCE Father Anthony was a student at Wash. U. picketing and demonstrating. "There is so much to do and I can do so little the best thing I can do is pray." As a novice he heard a monk say, "Don't wave at the niggers, just say your rosary. "If that is the monastery, I'm in the wrong place. Dom Augustine said, "Stay with it we are changing."

FRIENDS ARE STRANGERS Fred, a fellow teacher, sat next to me in chapel. He had been depressed all Fall. His father died, he had to make the decision and he feels the guilt and grief of it. H was in a bad accident and his wife came within an hour of dying. All this he told me in 3 minutes. I never really felt close to him but his open confession changed my feelings about him. And, I wonder how many are around me on the faculty that feel the same way. No wonder we feel so marginalized.

POFESSOR/ INTRODUCTION There was a young minister at Esser, As time passed he knew lesser and lesser, When at last he knew nothing at all, They made him a Seminary Professor."

SPIRIITUAL GRAND CHILD Bobbie Jean Merk, Founder and President of “A Great Love” (a religious organiazation) in Toccoa, Georgia. She published 10,000 copies of the Heart of Paul. Her mother was conversed to Christ in a Lay Witness Mission and influenced Bobbie Jean to Christ. When she finished the rehearsal, she said, "I guess that makes me your spiritual grandchild.

VISION TOO LARGE Les said to me, "I have a vision of the church and of my life hat is so large I am overwhelmed, so large that I will never do it all." Does one not have to begin where one is? Do the next thing at hand. Let the larger vision stand in the background as you pursue the next task.

BIRTHDAY FLIGHT -- 60 years old. I let the meeting early to make my fight. Walked to the counter "Cancelled” No options that worked. American. to Dallas was already outside the gate and they would not board me. So I took DL 1676 at 6:55. Got on 24D in tourist. Susan, my stewardess, and I told her my plight. She took me up to First Class and graciously seated me. What can I do, give you to drink?

Sorry We'll make it good for you.. Besides she said, "you don't look 60" There was a steak in first class but we are not supposed to serve it to anyone. But, I would have given it to you if I had not thrown it away. The First Class Stewardess asked "What does your wife drink -- scotch, vodka, wine, anything. So she fixed a care package of 8 drinks to take to my wife. It was not all bad being late. In Dallas I went to the counter and said, "You know what has happened to me. And they gave me first class all the way to Atlanta. I called Nan in Dallas to tell her. She was OK with my missing my birthday.

IMAGE OF GOD Art Caleandro sent Nancy Joyce to see me. She had been in Atlanta for 5 years. Been in AA 17 years. Dry but does not get from AA what she once did and what she needs today. Here’s her story. Reared in a Catholic Neighborhood in NY; at 5 her friend told her she would go to purgatory if she were not a Catholic. A fearful image of God was born in her mind that haunted her ever since. She was divorced from a Jewish husband. Visited Peel's church and later went back to explore this Higher Power. In November she hit bottom and began to cry. Then she found some literature on co-dependence and a story about a bunny that gave his life to save a mouse -- a Symbol of Christ. As she told about the story she broke into tears. She felt angry at God who stood by like the wolf and let her suffer. She got through it and came to rest in God who loves her. "I have found the love of God and I don't want to ever lose it. I need to get with folks who can help me and nurture this faith." I still have trouble reading the Bible because it reminds me of a fearful God.

KOREAN EVANGELISM AND TOMMY BROWN He said that the Korean Church taught him: 1. Expectancy, they expect something to happen when the pray, preach, or witness; 2. Role -- gave him a role as a pastor, missionary and evangelist. 3. Vocabulary -- a biblical vocabulary and new words were in fact old words and the people understood the basic vocabulary of faith.

NEW CHURCH NEEDED My Taxi driver in Indianapolis was 65 plus. Where were you reared? Minnesota. You must have been a Lutheran. No, a Catholic. But I don't go anymore. I found he was going to an Assembly of God like church, but not denominational. Why? 'I want to know God better." What are you getting? 1. I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit when I go to church. Not afraid to lift my hands in the praise of the Lord. 2. My pastor teaches the scripture. He only teaches the Bible. How did you get there? I felt a need to get closer to God and I set about looking for a church that I could get closer to God in."

THE DEVIL??? Six months ago I asked Shep to go on a retreat with me. He spent two days with me at the monastery. He called. I need to hear a word from the Lord. I got home and Ann met me at the door saying that Mrs. ______ husband had died. If there is anything I hate, it is a funeral. I take them seriously. Had the funeral. Then a surprise. A second service 30 miles away. I felt so much anger, frustration and lack of preparation that I was berserk.

"Is this Lord your reward for me when I go on a 2 day retreat?

MEETING IN HEAVEN At the international gate at the Atlanta Airport. Looking at the people come through the gates made me think of heaven. They are all colors, shapes, and cultures. 1. One is snappy, glancing here and there like he's late and in a rush. 2. Another seems bewildered as to where he is. Seems to be wondering what to do next? 3. There is a man and woman who have been separated by miles and an ocean. They run and leap in each other arms and cry. (Nan, why don't you celebrate my home=coming like that?) 4. Somebody there, waiting, looking for me and rejoicing when I get home. Heaven must be like that with those who have gone on before us there waiting and looking for our arrival. Once Henri Nouwen said we "can endure if we know that someone is waiting for us." Prayers for Ministers and other Servants.

IMAGES BLOCK COMMUNICATION I was asked to give leadership for to a gathering of chaplains from the various PCUSA colleges across the country. They were meeting in Atlanta at CTS. One of the chaplains was from UCLA. His name was Church. He saddled me with the salesman image. Very nervous about Evangelism! He said, "I just share my faith; I don't believe in extending it to others in an intentional way." We are different at UCLA!

FEAR OF CHANGE/ ONE'S PERSONAL IMAGE One of the Chaplains said, "If I go back and do what you say, I'll have to explain to those who have followed me why I am doing it. Maybe associated with groups I don't want to be associated with.

PASSION -- WHERE AND HOW TO FIND IT. How do you get passion? (Someone asked this after I said, "Evangelism is like sex, if you have enough passion, you will find a method.) Same way you get passion in sex: get close, touch, give free rein to your imagination, respond to the deepest feelings within you. When you do all this your passion for God will rise to the surface and will emote a motivating energy in your life.

REVITALIZATION I say to some congregations I hope you will not invite anyone to the church. I think it would work against you." They don't need to hear the debate over how to use the old manse or paint the kitchen white or yellow. "Come join us we are having one hell of a fight."

DEFINITION OF EVANGELISM Gary Demorest: "Evangelism is the joyful sharing of he good news of God's saving love, calling people to repentance, personal faith in Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord, active membership in the church and obedient service in the world."

UNCHURCHED Speaking in the South Gary asked a group to identify 2 and no more than 5 unchurched persons. "Preacher, there ain't nobody in my community or at work who don't go to church. Think about it anyway, Gary said. The next day the same man came back saying, "preacher, I got 5: two Baptists and 2 Catholics, and 1 Mormon. 65% are unchurched even though they may be a member somewhere. (Preacher found out that 9 out of 10 did not want the church to grow. They might not be like us, they say.)

WONDERFUL PREACHER Katy Keeble wrote me a note after a sermon at North Avenue. "Dear Reverend Johnson, I was really touched by last week's sermon. I knew that you were preaching from the heart.; You are a wonderful preacher, and I love to come hear your sermons. Many thanks, Katy Keeble. (15 year old) (I save notes like this because there are days that I need to read them.)

REFORMATION Randy Taylor in the Orlando Conference said,” Reformation is not an event but is a process." We need to get our bearings from the 15-16th centuries. That period may be something of a paradigm for today. The printing press, birth of the middle class, the explosion of the renaissance, the extension of the Ottoman Empire across most of Europe. Copernicus and Galileo. Decline of the hierarchy of the Church.

Columbus left, and did not know where he was going. When he arrived he did not know where he was; And when he got home he did not know where he had been.

REFORMATION FOR TODAY We need to know that reformation is not revolution (though revolution has a structure and aim of is own and a legitimate place); Reformation is not restoration -- can never restore the past. What does Reformation Consist in: Remembering; Re-envisioning (see what everyone else sees but in a different way); Renewal- a vision for a better future; and Revelation -- the intervention of God.

INTRODUCTION OF THE SPEAKER IN TULSA.

There was a Young Minister from Esser

The more he preached, he knew lesser and lesser

Alas, when he finally preached on the Fall

He showed he knew nothing at all,

Then, they made him a seminary professor

WITNESS TO ME I met a Jewish man on a plane. He demanded my witness. He was part of a Kibbutz, the place where they lived in a commune and shared all their goods. His name was EMANUEL and was very friendly, drove from Raleigh and was taking a plan to NYC and on to Tel Aviv, Israel Wondered if God wanted me to witness to him about Christ. I was busy getting ready to lead a Small Group training conference at Marble. But he chose to witness to me and told me why he chose to join a Kibbutz, there he found care for his health, children, education, and his future. But all his children must choose after college whether they will remain in the Kibbutz. He has been in the Kibbutz for 41 years. He is leftist and is non-religious.

NARROW VISION Lord, bless me and my wife, our son John and his wife, us 4 and no more. (one child); Lord, bless me and Sue, just us two, that will do. (no child) Lord, bless only me, for that is as far as I can see. (1 self-centered soul) Lord, bless me and all your creatures, the world and all its peoples, for all are important to you and one another. ---- add prayer of abandonment.

ENCOUNTER AND AFFIRMATION An old preacher took my hand and looked me in the eye: "Ben, we believe you because you know of which you speak. You have been there and experienced what you say. And, when you talk, you don't have a bill of goods to sell, so we can trust you." !!! What a special word of encouragement to me that day...

PROUD TO BE IN THE FAMILY Mr. Fayette Davis died in January. Bryan did a masterful task of greeting the friends. Next week at lunch with his dad, he said, "I'm really proud to be part of this family!" He was recalling all that his grandfather was and had done. Jarrett told me this story in tears because of all the pain he has been through. I thought, "Does not the Father deserve to know of our appreciation?"

INTRODUCTION (nervous person) Chair of the Renewal Committee had to announce my coming. She was nervous, too nervous to hold the mike. She was shaking; made the announcement, spoke about the weekend! When she got home her 23 year old son realized what had happened and seeking to encourage her said, "You did real good, sounded like a beer commercial especially when you spoke about the man coming as being "warm and outgoing."

RECORDED Denn Denning had written Lloyd Ogilvie for a luncheon appointment. He said he would call when he got to Omaha (Lloyd would) Phone rang and the 11 year old son answered, his face grimaced, held the phone away from his face, saying, "Here Daddy, its for you, it sounds like a tape recording." How many of us sound like a tape recorder. Lloyd always sounded like God to me.

EISENHOWER CHRISTIAN AND THE BOOMERS Al Butzer minister at Oak Park. Boomers began coming to the church that was founded in the 50's. In that time there was a rush to the church, folks who believe, good people but they don't know anything about the faith, a little cultural commitment, the flag, the Our Father, And Our Father's God to Thee. But new people ask about God, faith, and the practical application of the faith The former members have never seriously asked these questions and don't know what the church is about

JOY IN THE CHURCH Lady called and asked for Joy in the Church. I don't believe I wrote that book. I'm getting older and forgetful but I think I'd recall writing a book. She wanted Join he Church.

EVANELIST --- TATERS E. C. Wilson a student of Carol Weir at SFTS came up with a number of "taters" "Transcendental Evangelism" connect Christian Service with taters. In need person are like mashed , scalloped, fried potatoes or uh, tater. Christians are not to be spec-taters, BUT TO BE FACILI-TATERS,

IDEA "There is nothing more dangerous than a man with an idea --- especially when it is the only idea he has." Marion Findley, doctoral candidate.

SEE CHRIST IN THE PEOPLE WE SERVE A WITNESS, Jan Horn drove me to Albany from Glen Falls, NY She was divorced for 2 years. Belongs to Alanon. She descried her church as spirited. I asked what that means? "In their voice, way they read the gospel, prayers, esp. at the beginning when they call us to worship, assume that God is here and for us and we can take a part of God in our lives."

I come needing to hear. "Each day before I go to work, I read over these prayers in the bulletin. She sent me a list of them. Each week in the nursing home she reads Beuchner and recalls how the Pope pauses before each person ---"Looking for Christ in each person" And, "I have some cantankerous old people in this home and I try to see Christ in them."

As an order declines the Abbott went on a silent retreat with a hermit. The Hermit gave the Abbott one word. "One among you is the Christ." He thought about it. He told the other monks about it. And soon the monastery was transformed as they were seeking to find Christ in a brother.

DON'T ADVERTISE John had a church in North Alabama. Bought signs and erected them with an elder. A few members noticed and asked who put them up. Preacher admitted he had. "But why, we know where the church is." Well, there might be some new people who would like to come." "But that might get some people here who are not Presbyterian Types." Keep it a secret. Selective Membership.

ISSUES WE KNOW Most of us know in casual conversation what the issues before the nation and the church are. Martha Rosselot at the home of one of our friends said "What are the issues?" The folks there said: family, bonding, values, abortion, euthanasia, medical ethics, gene building and DNA, sexual revolution.

MUSHROOM "I must be a mushroom because everybody feeds me shit and keeps me in the dark." 20 miles from Kernet's Square, Pa.

HOLINESS IN LEADERS In Philadelphia Presbytery the issue of monogamous marriage arose. Do you think leadership in the church would condemn extra-marital sex? Yes. Associate said this to the youth. The associate had divorced his wife and moved in with a girl friend. Church down the street distributed condoms at an 11:00 a.m. worship service. Is it any wonder we are in decline? Can we hear no voice of judgment?

CONTRADICTING SEMINARY TRAINING Charles had a visit with Joel, a businessman. Stress in his work, wife and baby having trouble. Charles did a good job of listening. I said, "Here, instead of reading the Bible, you could have said, "God loves you, wants to be part of your life. God will help you, I invite you to think about that." Jack: "Do you realize you are contradicting all the pastoral care instruction that I had in seminary?. You are infringing on his personhood. Yes. I do know that and I invite you to change.

UNCONSCIOUS INFLUENCE/WITNESS Stewart Ryder, Ph. D. in linguistics told me about his formative influences in the faith. His grandfather, a Universalist, died in the Unitarian church. Rev. Raymond Edwards, took an interest in him and baptized him at 23 years and talked with him about going to Yale. Will, a divinity student on the third flood, spoke about ministry but was deeply interested in him as a person. He decided at his suggestion to go to Yale Divinity School -- had no call, not sure about the faith. Frank Reed vouched for him to "come under care." He influenced him without knowing it. Presbytery surely would reject him. He said he wanted to go to seminary to find out what it meant to be a Christian. H. R. Niebuhr hade a session with 25 students 2 or 3 times. One day after going to work with NE Texas Parish, he returned and Niebuhr said, "Hello, Stewart, good to see you back." He knew his name. These were the formative influences. Note that folks too an interest in him.`

HUNGER FOR THE WORD I spoke my heart to Blackhawk Presbytery -- a man 65 said "You spoke to me; recalled how Christ came at campfire; has been in Presbytery for 10 years but has not heard this witness. Woman at McCormick doing her field work said that all of us at McCormick are talking about this need for the Spirit. Her face glowed as I spoke. A third man gave me his card and thanked me for my words. The presbytery gave me a warm extended applause. Spoke to the soul of the Presbytery, not to the intellect.

DON'T MENTION IT Barbara Peterson, assoc. at Black Hawk Presbytery wanted to talk. She took me to her home from Rockford. She said that after the talk at Presbytery she experienced ministerial resistance etc. I had a deep sense of your life with God. Spontaneously I asked, "When are you going to seminary?" "Don't mention that. I don't want to deal with that issue. I can’t go." That's up to you. God will show you if you are willing to follow. I don't want to pray that way. After the Presbytery meeting she caught me before leaving and said, "I am willing to ask him to show me what to do."

CROSS TO BEAR Sue Armstrong met me in '88 in Chicago. She lives in Rockford and goes to First Pres. She had cancer, recurrence, and the doctors cannot operate. “But, I am at peace. I have confidence in our Lord and am completely committed to his will." She told this in church and a 90 year old grandmother said, "Now you know how I have felt for years!" (woman had a soft and gentleness spirit)

SEEKER In Pittsburgh, Pa., a cook at the church center said, “I'd like to talk with you --- how to use imagination. He began a story when he was about 20. He had a strange leader as a religious influence; he was, skeptical. Moved to Detroit, went to churches asking for fellowship. Joined Bible study group, but still wanted more, he wished to meet more than once a month. They were all very dry. After 2 years she gave up. He was sad, searching and feeling that God had failed him. Now, he has a different way to believe in the Spirit. This is different from belief in the spirit of Shakespeare. It is more than reading to get the spirit of a writer or a list of principles. What do you believe about the Spirit, I asked. I believe in a living presence here with us now. Several times time he said to me, "I am glad you believe; I needed to hear that; I'm not sure all our churches believed that the Spirit is active among us today.

I suggest that you cease trying to recreate the original experience. “Its the only way I know,” he said. Sure. But you must meet God in the present moment. Looking past God. There is an old analogy, the Rabbi was riding an ass looking for his ass.

STRETCHED THEOLOGICALLY Jones Draudrell- felt stepped on by my presentation. Steeped in Campus Crusade. Came in to talk with me about Evangelism Explosion and the 4 Spiritual. Laws because he felt they had been discounted. But ... He was actually feeling threatened by the presentations.

The image came to me 1) to hold the water in banks takes lots of energy; 2) let the water surge and over-flow; it can and there is no danger because it will settle back into the banks; 3) think what freedom when you don't have to hold the water in; 4) joy and delight in letting it happen.

SNAG IN CALL.. Mark McCann. In Spty class for Lay Inst. "How do you know you are called?" Came to see me. Began with his marriage in trouble. Wife was having an affair. They had been in counseling. Can't be a minister if I don't put it together. 1)I had experienced divorce 20 years ago (Rom. 11:29); 2) Jim Miller lost his wife in seminary. When he heard that Mark looked relieved. "I know that I was sent to talk with you." Mark first heard a call at P.C. College. Went to a Seminary week-end. Tried to settle for youth work. And, he sought to be a good lay person. Then he met a woman at the mall he had not seen for years. She said, "Sit down. You need to get on with your life. There are two ways: way of life and the way of death. Get on with life, she said. She was a prophet. I knew she spoke the word of God to me.

Bad Buddhist -- (I relate this to a Muslim I met in Detroit) A Japanese exchange student was talking with a seminary student (Venessa Potter) about Christian faith. She asked. 1) What do you believe? 2) Why are you going into the ministry; 3) What faith meant to her. Then Venessa asked about her religion: a Buddhist, 2)How are priests made? 3) How does one become a Buddhist? Not sure. She was about to ask another question when the young woman stopped her: "I don't know much about Buddha. I guess I am a bad Buddhist."

MUST CHANGE Bob Meyer had a blank look on his face for the whole service. I wondered what he was thinking. After the service he said, "Your closeness to God awes me." "Please." "I'm just telling you how I feel. O. K. I accept. Believe in God really challenges me. If I believe, really believe, think what that means. "I will have to change my way of life. "Yes, if god is -- the only one, our source, cares for us. Bob said, "That really frightens me. I don't know if I can do it. Too big. Too much. "Give as much of yourself as you can to as much of God as you understand." NOW. "BCJ "You can trust God really cares for you and will give you the power to change."

I STAND AT THE DOOR A clinical psychologist said, "Your book really spoke powerfully to me. So much like the Lord." I read it twice and it said something different both times. (Kristi) Joanne asked, Have you read God Calling. Your book reminds me of this. Joanne the nurse. I have read your book two of three times. It is so simple, so clear and it addresses me where I am. I understand it."

CAN'T GO INSIDE SELF Joanne (Sunnyvale) I have been struggling for a year. Felt a void. I am a single parent, all children are gone. What is my purpose now? I have read I Stand at the Door each day. Speaks to me but I haven't gone inside. I still have my hands up, holding him at arms length. "Why don't you look inside?" "I'm afraid"

"I don't know about the devil but something keeps us from following. I encourage you, don't be afraid. God does not speak harsh condemning words to searching hearts. Bj remark

SPIRITUALITY LIKE SMOKE. Rick -- retired engineer, began a soft ware co. This Spty is like smoke, I can't get a grip on it." 1) It is another dimension of reality beyond the physical and requires a different way of dealing with; 2) Difference in an active and receptive mode." "Oh, like when I am running -- things come to me and fill my mind when I'm not trying." "Yes, and there is a long tradition and a language created by those who have lived in the Spirit.

HYPNOTIZED CROWD Kristi said 'You had the whole crowd hypnotized and things happen in that state that does not occur when you are only speaking to a person's reason. When you speak only to their reason they use only 10% of their mind." 1) Authenticity of the speaker has something to do with the communication. 2) Gift of the Holy Spirit also connects spiritually to the audience. 3) Transformation really happens when persons have the is kind of focus, this kind of openness.

JESUS WORDS "Stop looking w/o for me. I am in you, in the depth of your awareness. Be still and know. I delight to use you. You are my friend. Trust me to do in and through you my will. Count on me. I am ready to do something good for my people. Go on being yourself. I can best use you when you are most fully yourself and I communicate through your authenticity.

An old man at the church came up. "I felt the Spirit of God through you. I feel close to God when I hold your hand. Is there a change in me? Folks do not usually do or say this as often as they have this weekend. (God uses things like this to encourage me.)

BETRAYED BY A PASTOR Chris at Carlos' Restaurant. He is a 23 year old waiter at Carlos' Rest. Very attentive to the customer! Asked what I was doing -- lecture at the Church. May I ask you a question, "Are you involved with a church." No. Could I be so presumptuous as to ask, "Why?" His parents had told him not to bother with the church. They felt betrayed by a minister and never went back to church after they were married. Because they never went, he never has either. I wonder about the minister -- and about the parents who have shaped the values of this young man.

SEED PLANTED -- We never know when we are planting seed for the future. Earl Hatcher took me to the a'port. Said, "I've never been moved closer to God." I have only been in the church for the past 2 or 3 years now. How did you get back into church? 1) Dr. Coleman, minister, conducted by parents funeral. At Dad's funeral, he called my 2 brothers and me up and asked about our life with God. Honestly, all of us were embarrassed. But he said, "Remember life is more than making money!" My faith lay on fallow ground for years. I believed but did not grow! Like Neil Hamilton said, "Salvation has covered the outside but persons do not grow inside." 2) "A man I worked with. He and wife were rock solid Christians. Catholics. They never talked about it unless I brought it up. But they would speak with you then." They had a good family, children, sold life. They kept at it even when he had palsy bad. (Two things: a seed planted by a minister that took 10 years to sprout; and the witness of a fellow worker for 20 years.) He never married. Change came about at the time of retirement.

12 STEPS LEFT HER HUNGRY. Rick and Barbara picked me up in San. Fran when I missed the fight from Dallas. They had been out of church for 20 years. She had problems; got in a 12 step AA program. She had some good changes but her relationships were a little ragged. Her boss knew something of her situation and said, "You might try going back to church again." I saw her as bright, energetic, and attractive.

PASTORAL FEAR (talk with folk) When persons come in for counseling, I feel very competent to talk with them. But when they raise the subject of being face to face with Christ it scares the pants off me. (Woman) When I was in Seminary they did not equip me for this task. "How to give Spiritual direction to people." Woman, husband had Alzheimer’s feeling very guilty. (very proper Baptist Woman) Had an affair years ago -- guilt, shame, eating away at her spirit. Read to her John 8 "Who are you in the story?" The woman. When she read the words, a miracle occurred! Transformed! I want more of my ministry to engage persons in their relation to God. *(Mark had 6-8 persons -- Dr. Lawyer, Insurance Salesman -- help me with my preaching. "Help me know how to workout the faith in the market place." That is what the laymen wanted. Relevance, effectiveness, assurance of God's will. (Mark of Cornelia)

PRESBYTERIAN MIND SET ON EVANGELISM Dean Brown. We had spent 1 hour discussing the importance of concern to "reach out" to the unchurched. Dean -- told of his small church. White Presbyterian, which is in a racially mixed neighbor with many single mothers. The church offered baby-sitting. They got 50 to 75 cents for 1 or 2hours. Gave them 4-6 hours free. And we don't try to evangelize them; we do it for love. We don’t even ask them to church. Began doing this four years ago and a few have actually come. RAGE. I said, "That's Pres. Evangelism." What false assumption stands behind this attitude: 1) don't need the gospel; 2) deed is adequate; 3) we don't believe in the power of the gospel to save and change; 4) that persons outside are not interested in the gospel; 5) excess fear of manipulating persons.

USE YOUR MOUTH Tyler Downing said, "My father always said, "Boy, you ain't got much but a mouth, better find a way to make yourself a living with your mouth." He became a teacher and then a minister. (Always sickly; asthma, once nearly died. While he was growing up, the directive "Use your Mouth" was repeated a number of times.

WORSHIP AWAKENS LIFE A fellow once told me that when his wife was pregnant they came to church. And When the organ played deep, bass notes, the baby was very active -- kick and thrash about." It occurred to me that is what worship does -- without effort on our part, it stimulates the Christ who has been conceived in us." What are the notes that have stirred the Spirit in you?

WORSHIP -- LOSS OF CONNECTION. Sometimes I am so busy in worship following the proper order, I don't notice what I am really about. Following the leader but not noticing the landscape." Suggests the liturgy should be simple and the liturgist sensitive. If I had to bulletin early I could be prepared. The heads in worship -- all action words. When I noted this it was my first awareness that I should be "active" in worship.

PASTOR COPING. Jim Ketzel in Chicago. Picked me up to speak at Presbytery. He asked me what I thought created growing churches. (then I asked him "How he saw the church?" Most pastors are trying to cope -- anxious that they do not do the wrong thing; fear of failure and rejection. They often lack a vision." "Is this the root of a maintenance mentality; the keeper of the status quo?" I asked. Exactly! (BJ "How oppressive they ministry must be under those circumstances." I had strong feelings that Jim was giving his own witness.)

ANGEL UNAWARE. It was a day of being an angel, unaware. It was 3:00 a.m. When I awoke w/o sleep and I recalled the day: 1) Steve who was struggling with whether he should stay in the M. Div. program; 2) Call to Don Wardlaw -- the first call he had from CTS since leaving; 3) asked Gregg Lund to edit a Spty newsletter. His gifts and interest as a journalist at CTS can be used and he needs the money; 4) Asked Ruth Rushing to teach in Intensive and she was elated. 5) Visited Vee Huie and Wade. Gave Wade a quart of Glynfidish and had prayer. Sometimes at 3:00 a.m. we wake up to the fact that God may have blessed persons through us.

TENSION IN A RENEWING CHURCH. Al Butzer (get the whole story) He told of 2 groups in the church: old families; and new yuppies. 1) Woman’s mother dies -- an old time elder did not know about it and she feels excluded and angry; 2) second elder said, "All in our group knew; we had prayed for her for weeks and we were with her for support. If asked she would say how much the church had cared for her. The first elder did not know what was going on in the church and assumed that the woman had been alone when she was being loved and cared for by persons in her group.

Another group had always done the "Hanging of the Greens" at Christmas. 1) old families decided to have 8 new families to do the work. but when they finished doing it, the old families decided "they don't know how to do it." 2) Next year the old heads bailed out; 3) New group picked up on the task and the old heads decided that it did not look right -- It was no good because it had not been done like they always did it.

AWAKENING TO FAITH. Bill Horlock was baptized at Central Presbyterian Church in Chattanooga and confirmed at age 10. Went to church 6 times in the next 6 years. In a N. T. Class at McCauley's he began to hear for the first time. In fact, in the class he began to believe. He went to church wondering what had happened to him. The Youth Leaders read from the Bible, "If anyone is in Christ ...." Bill said, "I knew there was new life in me because of the change in attitudes and desires I experienced."

IN PROGRESS . "Find it on the Run." SKY MAG. A review of Casablanca -- 50th anniversary! Bogart and Bergman. Strange. Movie was sold before it was completely written. Got financing with a verbal description of how it would develop. But when they began filming they were still changing the scenes daily. Writing the scripts. This dialogue between Ilse (Bergman) and Rick (Bogart) is symbolic. Ilsa: "Can I tell you a story, Rick?" Rick said: "Has it got a wild finish?" Ilsa: "I don't know the finish yet." Rick said, "Well go on and tell it. Maybe one will come to you as you go along."

Symbolic in another way. It is how we live our lives. In our obedience we don't know how the story will end. We wait for the meaning to come to us and we go along hoping for the end. (Risky Obedience.)

FUTURE CHURCH. Phoebe Smith: "Do you think the church as we know it will continue?" "No." "Well, that ends that discussion. The small churches will wither and will look for new ways to survive. The super churches will get larger -- but they are shifting to a new form. There could be a rebirth of small churches at the level of "what churches are for." Worship God and Serve the Neighbor!

REASONS FOR THE CHURCH'S GROW. (K. S. Lattourette) 1. Striking power of Renewal -- claim the vitality of its origin. 2. Christianity is inclusive; all persons rich and poor. 3. Superior Organization -- can develop a new organization to meet changing needs; bishops, Monastics, mission organization. 4. Transcends Cultural barriers -- adapts everywhere. 5. Moral Integrity -- changed lives of its members. 6. Christians answered the intellectual questions of their day. 7. Knew when to stand firm and when to flex (adapt) Caesar vs. Athens. 8. Ability to survive in hard times. 9. Humanitarian concerns. 10. Uncompressing loyalty to Jesus Christ as God's Unique Revelation.

WITNESS TO DONALD TRUMP. Sue Dobbs: pastor of Lakeside Church in West Palm Beach, directly across waterway from Donald Trump’s home. Saw limo go by and followed it to the entrance. Guard stopped her. "I'm Sue Dobbs and I'm pastor of the Lakeside Church. "Ok, drive on up. She knocked at the door and the housekeep came: "I'm Sue Dobbs and I have come to see Mr. Trump." "O. K. he's up stairs." When he came down, she said, I have come to invite you to our church. "But you don't have a Sunday School for the children." "Now we do." What do you want with me. "I'd like you to come to our church sometime."

WASH FEET Bob Ramey was embarrassed about his feet. Had corns and bunions. Taught Class on renewal and had the class do a project. Mystery what each would do. Day for presentation came. Assembled at table: pitcher, basin towels (surely not going to wash feet). Yes! Woman made a presentation and had all take off shoes and socks. Then Wayne Smith came down the line washing everyone's feet. Came to Bob. Ben Traywick said, "Bob, did it heal your bunions?" "No, but it healed me of my pride and gave me a new level of self-acceptance." Have you been washed? Do we wash one another?

DO EVANGELISM? "What do you want from this workshop?" Fred said, "I would like a little muscle and skill in case I decide to do it." I defined evangelism. We did exercises and group process and then I led the group in directed prayer. Fred said, "I got more than I expected." (But I saw a strange and troubled look in Fred's eye and the eye of the woman who works for him.) Why did I think there were having an affair?

TELL ME WHAT'S IN YOUR HEART -- TO A MINISTER. A clergy person fresh from seminary and ready for success went to visit a 92 year old woman in his first parish. "Tell me what Jesus means to you," she said. Jerry gave her the seminary stuff -- creed, Barth, Theology etc. Then she said, "I don't want to know what’s in your head but what is in your heart?" He said, "I'm not sure I know how to tell you. I haven't been trained to speak about this in a personal way." "Then sit down. I will teach you how to share what is in your heard. And, she did.

EVERYDAY STUFF! THREE IMPORTANT THINGS TO HELP ON THE JOURNEY. Abbott Bernard Johnson. "What can you tell me to help me on my journey?" 1) An old Novice Master said, "Believe that everything that happens in your life happens for your good and God's glory. But you must take everything in this light for one denial breaks everything down." 2) Pray the AA serenity prayer daily -- "God give me the grace to accept the things I cannot change; the power to change the things that I can; and, the wisdom to know the difference." 3) St. Teresa said that we all need two senses: a sense of faith, and a sense of humor. If we wake up without a sense of faith then we must lean on our sense of humor. If we wake without a sense of humor we must lean on sense of faith.

PRAYER -- Child was praying. The father said, "Rachel, I can't hear you." She said, "I'm not talking to you."

HEARING -- People have been asking me about God but I have not had ears to hear. Strange how often I hear now that my ears are opened." Floyd from Louisana.

THE DIRECTIVES -- "The Director opened up part of my life that was clogged. It let life flow in and through me. I have done more work for this class than I have for any other class and yet I have had energy to do my other work." Flash Gordon

EMBARRASSED BY JEALOUSY Philip. "I am embarrassed and ashamed to confess this to you -- I see another minister (Tommy Sykes) leading his church in growth by leaps and bounds. They seem to be doing nothing and people are flocking to them. "I work hard and our members invite folks to come but we don't seem to get any visitors.." How can I do it: 1) Talk with Tommy and tell him how you feel -- let the bond grow; 2) Focus on what it would-be like to pastor an 800 member church. 3) Face honestly that you are 40 yrs. old and having normal tension and frustration; -- "Don't talk with me about the mid-life crisis. I don't believe in it." "Well you don't have to believe in it to be in it." a) Assess where you are; b) Recall your vision; c) Revision your life -- it’s not too late. 4) What is the will of God for you -- "No place is more fulfilling for you than God's will.

EMBARRASSED BY PRAYER In the class Marty wondered out loud, "Why do we not pray with ease with our colleagues?" (have we out secularized our secular members?) The greatest thing about this class was having ministers talk about God in our lives with our members and with other ministers. By doing it, we know now that we can.

EMBARRASSED SESSION Casey was a high roller, a savings and loan manager. Things went wrong. Nobody would hire him; got a job driving a truck. Knowing of his situation, the minister (Ed Hurley) wrote him a letter. Casey reasoned that if the minister cared for him, maybe God did. Casey went before the session for membership. All the other members told rather superficial stories about their church and life. (Need a church home; the church to be in; played soft ball with the church; had always wanted to be a Presbyterian.) Then Casey spoke of his failure, shame, and desire for God in his life. When he finished, one of the elders told an irrelevant joke about a blind man -- everyone laughed -- the spirit dissolved or was grieved. Why would he do this? 1) Embarrassed for the man? 2) Inappropriate behavior in a PC (USA)? 3) Insecure in his own faith? 4) Maintain the present order of things. Whatever! This insensitivity is inexcusable in the Church of Jesus Christ.

WHAT TO DO IN A NEW CHURCH Ed was going to Bowling Green. What to do in a Constantinian Church. ("If you keep on doing what you've always done, you are going to get more of what you've already got. And, if you want something different, you will have to risk change.) My recommendations: 1) Preaching and Worship defines the vision and models the life of the POG. Must speak as a Man of God who believes God is alive and active. Preaching creates a world. 2) Visit each elder. Ask two questions: 1) How did you come to believe in Jesus Christ? 2) What does the faith mean to you? 3) How do you try to live it in the world? 4) What do you believe that God is calling us to do in this church? (Listen very hard--trace the faith, vision, hopes and hurts of the people of God in the stories that you hear.) 3) Begin to model the faith in a small group. Work with 10 or 12 persons intently for six months to a year until they are grounded in the vision: Worship, Care, Scripture, Community, and Mission. When these are mature enough to begin another group spin it off and keep working for vitality. Aim for 6 to 12 vital groups.

LICENSE TO LOVE A man at Marble had been Santa at Macy's for years. He found much fulfillment in the experience. He said to Rob Williams: "It's like having a license to love."

PRESBYTERIAN PROBLEM (George Telford Analysis) "I know, better than I wish I knew, the problems and predicaments of the Presbyterian presence in this country today.... I am also aware of our numerical decline, our inordinate preoccupation with structural and internal matters, the struggle by various groups within the church for dominance, and the apparent absence of distinguished leadership. But there is something else which outweighs all that:

There is an evident yearning among Presbyterians for a life of faith which is newer, fresher, more vibrant. People are hungry and thirsty--aware that in our churches, our religious life, and certainly in our personal lives, there is an emptiness and brokenness. There is underway a search for an authentic piety for our time. This desire is not confined

to conservatives, traditional pietistic, or faddish New Agers. It is emerging among so-called liberals, who never want to turn away from their passion for peace and justice, but who are ready to seek again a recovery of formative Christian disciplines, biblically rooted, focused on bible study, prayer, reflection on the context of their discipleship, issuing in more faithful forms of obedience.

DEATH MYTH In the PCUSA Church has created an believed a "death myth" "...that our churches are dying because of our faithfulness." How can a church die when it is faithful to the God of the Resurrection?

1. How many pastors do you know who base their lives on the risky gospel.
2. Can you account for 1,000,000 with the explanation of faithfulness?
3. Is not faithfulness a misnomer? Is it not a hollow rationalization; a cover up for ineptness; the protection of the status quo? Is there no other myth,
   1. What about the Phoenix Myth, the Exodus;
   2. The Return from Captivity --- a liberation myth.
   3. The resurrection -- the raising of the church to new life by the power of God. Are we not slaves to culture and its power; what we need is liberation from secular visions and methods, life from the dead that has reproductive power.

VOCATION Damian was my waiter at Druid Hills He was nice. I affirmed him for being nice and he responded with his southern gentility by asking me if I wanted a glass of tea. "If I didn't like what I'm doing, he said, "I'd do something else." Came by again "The customers are fun, its Elmo and Mr. Adams that are the pain in the neck." How would a church member speak this same truth? An associate minister.

BIBLICAL ILLITERACY Paul Lang was in O. T. Class when the professor assigned the next day's work as reading Genesis to II Kings. It was an overnight assignment. This didn't bother Paul until he heard Scott groan. He looked at the Bible and discovered it was nearly half the OT. Scott for the O. T. Quiz asked the bookstore if they had in Cliff Notes on the Bible he just didn't have time to read the whole thing. There is a Reader's Digest Version and I think this is the Ultimate redaction. A Text about the Text. Second handed Revelation.

APPROPRIATE WORK Some questions need to be asked about every job that you hold. 1. Does my job use my gifts to the fullest. 2. Does my work provide adequately for my needs and those of my family? 3. Does my work contribute to the common good? 4. Does my work evoke a sense of the call of God? (Perhaps this is the first question that we should ask.)

INNER VOICE --Listening to it. Hal Edwards was drilling in the back yard with a gas powered drill to place a fence around his arbor. He was on line for the fence ut he his "something" and a bolt, smoke, and shock ensued. Started to put the drill back into the hole and the voice came" "The hole is deep enough." Before him flashed an image of Thomas Merton and the electric plug that killed him in India.) Suddenly the house lights went out. Called Comwealth Edison. "Car hit a pole, lights are out for 7 blocks." Went back to work at the Arbor. Then he discovered that he had drilled into a power line with 7200 volts of current. "You should be a pile of ashes."

THE BODY KNOWS Alan Richardson told me of ministering to a woman who had pain in her left arm. When she turned, reached behind her back she had pain. When he moved her arm she said, O you are hurting me." When you say that, "What is going on." She said My mother used to twist my arm and spank me. The next visit he put his left hand on her shoulder, then gently move it. What does this mean? My sister and I had our panties off and we were touching each other. Then she said, "I always masturbate with my left hand. "It doesn't count it you do it with you left hand."

PRESBYTERIAN DEADNESS A lady who was an associate in charge of stewardship did 4 interviews with persons asking them for their witness as stewards of God's gifts. When they gave testimony of their experiences at a Presbytery Meeting the Exec didn't like it because they were too evangelical. 2. Met with the clergy. She asked them to tell their faith story. They were terrified. "I didn't know that they did not know how!" (Why have Bible Study in our churches --- to make us look competitive to see who knows the most?)

HARD CHOICES Chris had narrowed the field to three choices of colleges: Jacksonville, Charleston, and Macon. Dad, this is like going to a hamburger place. Do you want it plain, seeded, or whole-wheat buns or do you want it with lettuce and tomato, back, or plain. "All are great and I'd like all three." But you have to choose. Dad, you knew that I would choose Charleston all the time." Am I an omniscient parent?

CAN'T HEAR YOU I want to be honest with you. When you come off like a pietist I can't hear you. I don't hear you affirming me and my way of faith." I am a nurtured Presbyterian. "Is it my speech or your hearing?" I pulled out a book and told him that I affirm both. I think he had so much trouble that he feared I did not affirm his faith. His name was Bob Madsen.

FORGIVENESS A minister, Raymond Nyquist from the Covenant Church said, "I heard your talk about forgiveness and hope for the fuure. I said, "If you had my mother, if you had my theology, if you had my conscience---you would know that I am a failure. But God says that I am forgiven. "I have listened to your tape 15 times." I have felt so low but my church stood by me. Kept their arms around 2 teen-agers and me. And now another church has called me to be their minister.

GREEK TO ME. David Satterfield went to the Greek Orthodox Church. He and his friend were met by a deaf greeter. He didn't speak well either. They sat on a pew and nobody in the church would sit with them. They tried to participate in the liturgy but it was difficult for them to know what was happening. Greeks filled the pew when they left. On the way out they said, "It's all Greek to me!"

CONFESSION/ About all I know to confess. Jap Keith asked the question, "How shall we confess our sins in words." When he went to an interim pastorate the secretary said, "I'm so glad you have come. I hope you will write the prayers of confession.; "I've about run out of words say!." Have you about confessed all you know to say?

Confessing is like whispering into a canyon and the echo is deafening. We need to walk down the roadways of our lives beside the rivers of our memories and recall those things in our lives that demand confession. So we confess our sins to God and trust in God's rich mercy to forgive us.

TELL THE WHOLE CHURCH I had gone over the vows of baptism with Shelly R. (doesn't stand for anything, just R. ) Russak. 1. Do you believe in God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit (I DO) 2. Do you confess your need for forgiveness and rely on Christ. 3. Do you promise to make diligent use of the means of grace (I stopped to explain) to continue in the peace and fellowship of the POG. I explained. She interrupted me, "You'd better tell the rest of them about that; they have been pretty cold to me and when I speak up nobody listens to what I say." I hardly had the energy to further my explanation of” with the aid of the H. S. to continue as a faithful disciple unto the end. Do you not see the need of having a loving climate in which to receive persons -- and a community of faith that exhibits the things that we claim to believe.

GROUP LEADERSHIP In 30 years of leading groups I have never had a person speak out as a woman did in Annapolis: "I just can't do that." (I had already given permission to not participate.)

EVANGELISM SHOCK IN ANNAPOLIS When a councilwoman said she had to leave at 6:30 for a church meeting, that was shock enough. But as she was leaving one of the other members asked, what kind of church meeting. An evangelism meeting she replied. Another shock wave. But when she told them she was a Presbyterian, the floor collapsed under them. The shock was complete.

DREAM OF PREACHING Setting was a small group of 50 to 60 persons in a room. I am preaching away on the subject of "sin." If find myself struggling to recall the 3 major points. While I am groping for the ideas, a woman like Donna "Brown spoke up, "I don't feel like I need this." I say, I'm not too interested in this myself; this is not what I need either." What do you need, asked. She said, "I don't know." Then we move. As we go into the new room, someone says, "I've never seen a preacher respond to a person like that." (Does this not show i am both responsive and Need persons to recognize my skill and affirm me?)

RAPTURE IS COMING A woman called and talked with Nan about my being called to North Avenue Church. She told Nan that she had prayed over it and had talked with Tommy Cousins about my coming. Tommy said, "He's over 50 years old." She said, "Well that doesn't matter, the rapture is coming in 14 years. We don't have to worry about a long term preacher."

INTRODUCTION After J. I Packer had been introduced at Regent College, he said "After such an introduction I can hardly wait to hear what I have to say." Malcolm Muggeridge. He read the opening sentence of CS Lewis in his own inaugural address at Cambridge in 1954. "Theology is taught by God, teaches us about God, and takes us to God." Packer said that he was a theological dinosaur and there were not many left and we had better take advantage of the specimen while we have it before us. Maybe our last chance.

EYES OF CHRIST Haliford Luccock said, "Scripture says, 'we have the mind of Christ,' but wouldn't it be great if we could have the eyes of Christ -- to see the world as he sees it, to see persons as he sees them, even to see ourselves through his eyes."

INCOMPREHENSIBLE They say that a minister is invisible all week and incomprehensible on Sunday. But I attended my daughter's graduation and saw a Ph. D. in Astrophysics with a dissertation that would choke a hippo. It was titled: "Numerical Simulation of Supersonic Extragalactic

Radio Jets."

PROSPECTS Larry Cuthill did a workshop in the churches on the subject: "Ain't no fish in our pond." For those churches that claim there are no persons to be reached in their context.

PREACHING LOGIC Think of the text "How shall they believe in whom they have not heard or how shall the hear without a preacher, and how shall they preach unless they have been sent Deduction: believe, hear, preach. Induction: preach, hear, believe.

WILLOMAN/ ORLANDO A project of the Enlightenment was to make individuals who have no story to answer to, they can choose their own story. They have no tribe, class, or class to be accountable to. For example the statue of Moses by Michelangelo was signed by the sculptor with the notation that he had created moses himself, like God in some ways.

A HERETIC is "One who chooses" like one who chooses over against the church or another form of authority. This was from Heretical Imperative, Burger.

MODERNITY is also a story; it demands that I choose myself, nurture myself, make the self an end in itself. And this narrative world of he enlightenment excludes God, the values of the past, and resurrects the self as God. i.e. This narrative creates a world and it sits on its own foundation and calls forth a different kind of world.

THEOLOGIZE from my own experience -- Lettie Russell. Will said mine is not so rich and exciting. Evangelist preaching seeks to rescue people from their experiences and offers them a framework out of which to interpret the world.

PSYCHOLOGY is not help to preaching the gospel. It seems to tame it and make it fit into the needs of the individual. A La Peale.

EVANGELISM AS TRANSLATION Evangelism in modernity thinks it is very special and must translate the gospel by Marx, or Freud or Heidegger.

ILLUSTRATION OF LEARNING FRENCH "I can't learn French by reading a French Novel translated into English. Have to learn the language. When you do, you look out on the world through different eyes. Illustration of daughter learning chemistry. 1. Goes into a chemistry lab and muss study safety rules until she can pass a test -- so she won't get hurt. (like going to confirmation) 2. Gets goggles and robe (white smock) when you pass the test. 3. What are all those symbols on the walls. You don't know enough yet to hear about that. We'll get to that later on when you are ready. 4. Now the daughter comes home and buys deodorant that will keep you clear by dissolving to your body temperature. See, she is living a different way in her world because she has learned the language, vocabulary, and power of chemistry. Somewhat like the gospel.

IGNORANCE OF THE GOSPEL John,who didn't know enough to be an Elder. Preacher said, will you take your name off the list or will you permit it to be offered?. Why? You don't want to go through what you have to go through to learn the faith and be an Elder. Went home and thought about it. What did the preacher mean? How does he know? "Give me the damn books.

CHEMISTRY PROFESSOR I don't go to church. I can be just as good a Christian without the church as I can in the church. (Give me a pen let me write that down. I have never heard that before.) Now you not only know about chemistry but you are also a theologian. How did you get qualified to be a theologian? Why she we become intimidated.

UNCALLED FOR Tom Long's mother, "now that was uncalled for." Some things by contrast are "called for, called forth."

UNWRAPPING THE GOSPEL A man went to church in Germany during the war. He said the pastor was dealing with the text like he was "unwrapping a time bomb" it was dangerous and might explode in that conflagration. The whole church seemed to be like that.

FROZEN SPEECH ORLANDO Ben Johnson I have never had such an experience in trying to deliver an address as I had in Orlando. For 6 months I had been thinking about delivering these talks on spirituality and I wanted to be at my best. I worked hard on the talks, writing them in July and off and on during the fall I would read over and edit these during the fall. I reworked the talks while I was on the way home from Africa. I did want to do well as I spoke to these pastors of large churches.

I was introduced. I had decided not to read my Ms. but to speak to the ministers. As I began to speak, nothing seemed to connect. I felt myself getting tenser, and tenser. My mouth got dry. I spoke on and it got drier. I wondered where God was. I wondered why my mind had no energy in it. I felt so tense that I could hardly speak.

Finally, I stopped after my first point. "I do not understand this but I have so much tension trying to talk with you. So let me pause and pray for a moment if you will. I stopped. prayed.. and then went on but the talk did not come forth. I finished the talk. I did not take any questions. A few folk spoke to me and I deeply appreciated their efforts but I felt so defeated that I did not know what to do. I spent the afternoon beating myself for the poor job that I did. It did no good.

On the way back to Orlando from St. Pete where we had visited Nan’s parents, I continued my freeze up. Suddenly, it came to me. My "shadow" rose and grabbed me. My little boy that feels inferior and inadequate was activated by my speaking to a group of big, powerful pastors, those from the biggest churches. And that little boy and his inferiority suddenly felt threatened out of capacity to act. I was trapped and nothing that I could do would deliver me. I got up early the next morning and entered into the silence to find repose in Christ.

FEEL FOR PREACHING I missed the sermon of the Korean Student.

Monday. I was working on a book. Korean Students are not always the easiest to listen to even though I appreciate their effort to learn a second language. I got a tape of the sermon and took it home. As I was listening I was caught up in what he was saying. He captured my attention in a second language because he was magnetic, stirring, and compelling. I said to Nan, "This man has a feel for preaching. He constantly brings us back to God." He has a gift, a sixth sense, a clear intention in what he was saying. Such a contrast with many preachers I hear who seem so "wooden" ---not knowing what we are to do. (Be careful not to criticize clergy too hard. After all, I’m one of them.)

SERIOUS ABOUT GOD Jessie had made a list of sin and failure and had

confessed them to God and to another person. But, he said, I’m still not back,

there is a wall between us that I can't quite get through. Something else. Four

years ago I quit feeling. I don't feel pain o happiness and I have retreated into a shell. Others have even noticed. Can you shut down your feelings and still feel close to God? I wonder if you are in the dark night and God is gently leading you into a life that you do not know.

BACK FROM THE CHARISMATICS Jennifer, a United Methodist. All I could see in the church was organization, politics, and power play. Maybe I had to go to a non-denominational, charismatic church to find out what the church is all about. Why did you come back to the Presbyterian Church. "It (The Charismatic Church ) was warm, Bible centered, friendly but you can stand to be held over the abyss only for so long.

NO RESPONSIBILITY TO CONVERT Gayle White, a religion writer from the Atlanta Journal and Constitution, called me. The paper had helped fund research with UNC to get the pulse of the south. She had data that she did not know how to interpret. The older generation all believed they should share their faith and seek to make disciples of persons. But the younger generation did not share that faith. Why she asked does this younger generation not feel compelled to share the faith that has given them birth. I faxed her a copy of "The real reason for mainline decline!"

The Word of the Lord spoken to Catherine in the Dialogue:

I tell you, therefore, it is far better to walk by the spiritual counsel of a humble and unschooled person with a holy and upright conscience than by that of a well-read but proud scholar with great knowledge. For one cannot share what one does not have in oneself, and because these persons’ life is darksome, they often share the light of Holy Scripture in darkness. You will find the opposite in my servants, for they share the light within them in hunger and longing for others’ salvation. p. 157

Minister’s Prayer or the Lack of it. Conrad came into the office and sat down. I want to waste some of you time before I get into the paper that I am to write for the program. I hope that you know more is going on here that listening to lectures, reading books and writing papers. I have had my life turned upside down. I am being impacted by something that I never expected. I had my paper half written before I got here but everything has changed.

For the past ten years I have been building a Constantinian Church. We have grown and the budget has increased dramatically. I think that I serve the people well. I visit and listen and seek to pastor.

But I do not have a life with God. I read the Bible and seek to preach a descent sermon but I have no devotional life that reaches beyond preparing for the sermon. I don’t pray and this has been my patter for ten years. I am in need of help. I feel pretty desperate.

I find myself moved by this man’s story knowing that it is the story of so many who have no time for God.

Perry Wooten -- A man in International Banking. He was recommended to The Thompson Scholar program by Bruce Swanson.

He came in to talk about his sense of call. As I listened to him speak about 10 years in the Bronx, pastoring a black congregation, and being 57 years of age. I realized that there was no much out there for him. He circulated his PIF and got virtually no response so he has been very discouraged.

Then, it occurred to me that he might be open to working with CLC. I spoke of NCD and the possibility of working with business men and others in small groups etc. He was very open to the possibility.

Prodigal Son. In the ladies bible class room of a church that was having a hard time raising their budget, there was the picture of the rich young ruler who had just been told to sell what he had, give to the poor . . . And the expression on his face, contorted, struggle, etc. And that icon had formed the thoughts and feelings of the heart of that church for decades. Watch the symbols.

Preacher’s Choice. We visited Scott Weimer to talk about what he had done at Clairmont to bring it back from the dead. As he talked about working in this church that was near dead he said there were 6 things that he had decided to do. 1) He decided to give affirmation and love because the church was a wounded church; 2) To preach the good news because they had heard enough bad news; 3) Hard budget decisions had to be made to cut salary and the number of staff members; 4) Worked at conflict resolution and communication.; 5) Staff cuts; 6) The importance of casting a vision. These membership was fairly well convinced that the best was behind them and they had no vision for the future. Needed: Vision Casters.

Endurance Here for a Long Time A grandfather (Frank Harrington) asked his older grandson, “What do you think of your younger brother?”

“Well, he eats and sleeps a lot.”

“What else do you feel?”

“It looks like he’s going to be here for a long time!”

WOMAN’S SHAME Beth Hubbel A DCE

A friend of her daughter’s had asked her to attend Sunday School with her but her mother was checking out what went on before giving her permission.

A woman called about her daughter coming to Sunday School. “If she comes, what will you do with her?”

I would like to come with her but I am anxious. I don’t know the answer to many questions and if you should ask me questions I would feel ashamed that I do not know the answers.

She said, “I have never been to church and I am embarrassed that I do not know anything about it.

EFFECTIVE PEOPLE ... know what to do; do what is right at the right time.

Effective people are acted on by an outside force or cause. They have a sense of call, a vision, a dream that propels them forward.

Recall Joseph, the Dreamer. He was drawn from without. This was not a group experience, a collective, but a vision by a person, highly personal and individual.

“God is with you and God knows all the turns in the road.”

In one week-end Saul had a vision. It was a vision that shaped his whole life. He had a vision for the remainder of his life and never veered from it.

“God has decided to bless you and you must catch up with it.”

(Joseph provides a model for vision and finding the Will of God.)

Question to the Church. “What does it mean to be the People of God in this place at this time, with the resources that are available to us.”

VISION QUEST (Recall Hal Edwards -- clarity sessions, vision quest) What would a week of seeking a vision for a particular church do for that church.

Question. “What would God do if his will was done in this Church?”

Robert Schuler’s son wrote a biography of him and named it “Goliath.” In an interview he said that he named it this because his whole history had been doing battle with the giants.

Is it safe? Peter on the water was not free of risk but was safe. “Are you practicing a profession or following a call?”

VISION. Vision requires articulation. “Vision is caught. It is told in stories. Can’t be reduced to precepts.”

Carl George said that when he went to Fuller to teach, he went up on a hill overlooking San Bernardino. He sat there on a rock waiting for the guidance of the Lord. He seemed to hear, “I will be your fortune.” Later he took his granddaughter up on that mountain and showed her the rock that this decision was made. Wondering what she would think, as they came down the mountain she said, “Thank you for taking me up on the mountain and telling me the story.”

Tell the story of how your vision began. Vision usually comes when you come to the end of yourself. And it materializes when you take the risk to follow your vision.

VINEYARD CHURCH IN ATLANTA Johnny Crist was a 10th generation Mennonite educated at Goshen College, Eastern Seminary and then Melodyland center. Doing his D. Min at Fuller, he met Peter Wagner and came under the influence of John Wimber.

He said I had to build on my own foundation not another man’s -- thus he had to get into New Church Development

First he was an associate in Oklahoma City. In 1982 he came to Atlanta to begin the Vineyard Movement. He reached 6 persons in one year. It was a most painful experience. In 1984 he inherited a group of 30 persons and by 1989 he had 150 persons but the church never got off the ground. He left the city a failure In 1990 he came back to the city with a commitment to found the Church of Jesus Christ where there was an equality between the pastor and the laity. He ordained lay men to pastor groups of disciples.

• By 1991 there were 5 other vineyard churches.
• In 1992 there were 250 persons in the churches. and in 1993 500.
• In five years he had planted 5 churches and aims to plan 100 congregations in the city of Atlanta.

We have decided to “Be a Church for people who don’t like Church.” We recognize that we are more a hospital than a church. Things often look sloppy. “I don’t want to walk with a man unless he walks with a limp.”

TREE IS THE IMAGE OF THE VINEYARD CHURCH. There are 5 values in the Vineyard Movement. 1. Worship; 2. Relationships; 3. Healing; 4. Equipping persons for ministry; 5) Ministry to the poor.

CHURCH CHANGED Bruce Barstow is the pastor of a church in upstate New York. Twenty-five years ago one pastor could take care of 500 members, now it looks like you need a minister for every 200 members. He is part of a church that has changed drastically in the last two decades. First Order change is a matter of degree, but the structure is not really changed, a kind of evolution. Second Order Change means stop what you are doing and start up all over.

SECULAR REJECTION OF CHURCH. Today more than ever before in the US we are facing resistance to the church. 1. A church was cited for letting non-members part in their parking lot; 2. Churches are facing restrictive zoning so that they cannot buy houses and make parking lots, or expand their facilities; 3. Sued because they were playing their Carillon; 4. One church was sued for painting a door blue when it was on the national historical registry.

MAYAN PEOPLE IN MEXICO The development of the Mayan settlement began in 8th or 9th century CE and ended in the 2th or 13th. They had a very high culture. They knew much about mathematics and astronomy:

• invented the ‚ÄúO‚Äù
• predicted the year of Venus within 16 seconds
• defined the 365 day year
• built observatories
• predicted eclipses

The life of the people focused on their religion. They built up a sacred place about 10’ high which was about 10 square miles. In the center was a pyramid on top of which were offered sacrifices. Human sacrifices were offered to “the rain god,” and to the “Feathered Serpent of sea and water.”

Stadium. The had games like ball through a hoop, similar to basketball. The stadium was 185 feet by 100 feet and had a perfect acoustics so that you could sit in a box at one end and speak naturally and be heard at the other. The captain of the winning team had the honor of being sacrificed to the gods.

Temple. The Temple was so constructed that at the Winter Solstice the serpent made by shadows of the stones seemed to crawl up the temple. In the Summer Solstice he seemed to crawl down. This was achieved by shadows that came from stones precisely placed. The event lasts about 45 minutes and 30 to 45,000 persons gather to observe it.

Sacred Well. Divers have found people, plates, jewels, et at the bottom of this sink hole. In addition to this sacred well there was a water well for drinking.

ABUSE There is so much abuse in today’s world. A chaplain named KIP was abused by his father. He made him watch as he shot his dog and then he forced him to hold rabbits while he cut their heads off. He was told all of his life that he was no good. Nearly killed in an auto accident and still carries a plate in his head. How do people survive such abuse.

IMAGE OF GOD The Chaplain said that he could not use his father as an image because he left when he was a child; could not use his mother because she was sleeping with other men for years. Felt rejected and left out of life.

BOB LUPTON ISSUES IN SOCIETY VISION THEOLOGY FOR RECONSTRUCTION When Bob began his ministry he was working with youth offenders whose parents were not concerned about them Soon he saw that if the parents were not concerned the youth had very little chance of making it. But when he began to work with the parents, he realized that a number of societal influences were impinging upon them and that unless you worked with jobs, money, and community support then you were fighting a losing battle. These visions or insights led him into the work that he is now doing.

Soon after beginning this work he realized that he could not be a drive in minister, he had to move into the community. He and his wife were in the process of building a new house in Stone mountain. He said to her, “I believe that God wants us to move into the Summer Hill area and work with the people there.” She said, “If it is of God, I will go but if this is just another scheme of yours, count me out. Write it down and give it to me.” She then took it to her friends whom she trusted and asked them to read it and tell her if was of God. They moved.

They have been able to reclaim a two block area in Summer Hill. Once was an area with 5 groceries and other merchants with Greek, Jewish, and Anglo residents. Went bad. In these two blocks they have built houses and gotten folk off the street, into homes, and into community. Had one man across the street that started brining home a little fun drug, soon others were joining him. Neighbors got together. You will have to stop this. We are drug free and we don’t want our kids to get caught in a cross fire and hurt. Stopped. Lest they report it to the police.

But another family had a son who was dealing drugs. They went to the family. They did not believe he was dealing. They made pictures of the cars, the encounters, and transactions but the parents still did not believe. Then the neighbors went to the owner of the property and said that illegal activity was going on, a boiler plate condition of renting, and demanded that they evict the tenants. They did. This is a community being and pulling together.

Lupton said that we ought to look at 3 theologies: community, neighbor, and deployment. The latter relates to sending people into the city to be neighbors and to reclaim the city for God and goodness.

The development of the old prison was a vision. It had not been used since the turn of the century. Someone got the idea that it could help Atlanta’s homeless. Brought out the Architects and asked them to think about it. They got caught up in the vision and donated all the drawings. Then they went to the Contractors with whom they work and they offered to help remake the place, then they went to sub-contractors and they donated their time and others gave materials. Three or four million have been given and the lawyers got it off the tax books 62 apartments. Church, AA meetings, small gusiness, building houses in Summer Hill. Name of the place is _________Gate.

Joan Woodward met Ms. Brinc who is the aunt of Joan Woodward. She told her that she had always been an actress. Spoke of her mother as not being a very good mother -- she lacks childmind.

BLOOD AND FIRE MINISTRIES The vineyard movement has spawned a church in the inner city. Began when David ­­­­­__________ who was making over a $100,000 a year felt that God was saying to him, Feed the Poor. One Saturday he and a few friends of his bought food, put it in the back of the car and began to drive through Atlanta looking for a place to give it. They found Capitol Homes. Started 4 years ago (1991) and they have grown since.

The old warehouse was filled with junk, debris. Move 62 tons from the 5 story building. As the man walked about he told us how David and wanted the building. The owner wanted 3.2 million. Kept praying. Owner called, “You God must want you to have the building because all my offers have fallen through.” Went to the table -- you will need a substantial down payment. OK We have $1000 what were you thinking about $450,000. They began at 3.2 mil but bought the warehouse for $450,000.

As he walked through the warehouse he began to share the vision. Here we will worship God, this will be a gym with basketball courts, boxing rings and Holy field will help us instruct the kids. Here we will have class rooms to teach people about the faith. Over here will be training for small businesses. And we will tear this strip away and have an open air amphitheatre. On the second floor is the World Headquarters. Third and Fourth floors will be for dormitories when 5,000 youth come in for the Olympics to work for Christ.

The greatest impact on me was the vision that propels this ministry. Not once did they get focused on the building. They are there to reach people.

NOTHING CAN SHOCK ME Judy Smith was a stranger who showed up at the Chapel on the Hill. After the service she said to Rev. Phil, "The just threw me out of the Bible Church. Will you throw me out, too? No. But I have something that may shock you. "You can't shock me, I've been around the barn several times before. She turned to Phil and said, "I'm Jesus. Well, I never heard that before. Later, after she had been coming for awhile, Phil said to her "Judy, if you just cut out this bull shit about being Jesus we can get along and worship the Lord together." And she did. This is called "Directive Therapy and Blunt Pastoral Care."

WORLD ACCORDING TO GARP "I have heard it said that a man can live his whole life in one day and if that is true, 'today I have lived a wonderful life."

SECULAR Phil told me of a 30 year old banker who graduated from the

University of Wisconsin came to church and afterward asked, "What were you doing up there with that bread and wine." (These are the kinds of persons that the church will be preaching to more and more.)

PERMANENT WITNESS The driver who drove us to the airport in Cape Town was the most persistent constant unswerving "witness" I have ever met. He witnesses with all his life and he will until he dies. He gets up in the morning as a witness, and all through the day he is a witness. His name is "witness". His mother marked him. Why did your mother name you witness? I don’t know, he said. He is a Cousa and speaks Zulu and English. He is a witness in three languages. What we need is more men and women who are witnesses.

MISSION BARBARA TOMKIN She is the Mother Teresa of

Johannesburg. Attended the Church of England school – reared in Wales. A

Methodist. For years she spent her life on the fringe of religion. Eight years ago she said, "I fully gave myself to Christ." What does that mean? I have been through two

divorces. Marriage didn't work for me. Dogs, cats I get along with but not men.

I heard of refugees in North Transvaal, went and served for a few weeks.

Came back and said, "I want to resign my job and go to work for the church."

What will you do. I don't know so I went for a year just listening. The minister

(Tim Sawyer) was a bridge for me. I saw that Christianity was fun.

Then I had a vision. I saw a narrow road that led to a point. Jesus was standing at that point with his arms outstretched out;. He had on a robe and the sleeves dropped down. The light was bright, bright light shown behind Jesus.

On either side were men, women and children. Black, curly headed children showing. My vision was to bring folks into the light of Jesus. What she does is take a child that has been raped to the doctor for emergency treatment. or an year old 82 man to town to sign up for assistance, or gets a woman some flour and sugar so she can start a cookie business. Went to a right wing area and spoke on the radio about Jesus and work. The host said, "Why not whites, they are out of work." I felt the vision of Jesus come back as they interviewed me.

Words/LIFE/DEATH/ REVIVED/WORSHIP Wardlaw spoke at opening convocation at CTS. In the sermon he spoke of a runner, journalist, all-round good guy who came to church. Out of the corner of his eye he saw him collapse, called to a doctor, service disturbed. Runner died, they began to pump on his chest, breathe in mouth, everything. He and the congregation were non-pulsed. What do I do? When it was over, "He heard , “You are in good hands. Everything is going to be ok." Later wrote an article for national magazine in which he told how lying in church he heard words -- mere words, "Hank, everything is going to be O.K."

HEARD THAT SERMON Tom Long tells of going to a church as a visitor. When the service was over, he was sitting in the pew talking with friends. Most everyone had gone from the church. Young boy 4 or 5 was running around the church and finally went up to the pulpit and leaned into the mike, "Mommy, look at me." The fellow leaned over to Tom, "I believe that I have heard that story before."

DESPERATE/SHOP LIFTING I had never heard of Judy Kelly. She called and said she had been listening to a sermon of mine from North Avenue Church where I was the interim preacher for a couple of years. She wanted to talk to me. She came in and began crying. Her story went like this: married, son, divorced, Emory Law School, Bright future with (King and Spalding or another firm), went to Civil Service. Not making enough money -- gone to shop lifting, ashamed, helpless, and addicted. Needed help. I asked her if she had a wounded child and she said, "Yes." Her father loved her brother, but didn’t care much for her; he was more interested in fixing his teeth than sending her to college; the checks bounced. She was an agnostic until a saint spent time with her and loved her as she was.

ACTRESS/ LEACHMAN /COME BACK Dick Ballard was flying to Toronto -- Seatmate, barefoot, unkempt, short cropped hair, feet on the velvet and toes that were not too pretty, tried to talk, what do you read, know about TV, what movies, do you like? She was starring in Showboat that playing in Toronto. “Come and bring your children and come back stage and I’ll show you around.” “Whom should I ask for?” "Me, Leachman." As in Cloris? Precisely. The very same one.

FELT LIKE CHURCH SMALL GROUP In class Barbara Sims spoke of being part of a large church -- 3,000 members. It was a Black Church. She told of being a group of 7 women who read the Bible, prayed, and shared life. It has been one of the greatest things that has happened to me "It felt like the nearest thing to church that I have ever experienced!"

FEELING RIGHT GOD'S PRESENCE ASSURANCE George Pratt came to CTS, talked with Walter Brueggemann and me about beginning a new church in Jacksonville Fla. He would have no salary; he would relate to the Presbytery and live in the Structure. His wife AJ was behind him. After a few months he came back saying, "I do not know where this is leading and we don't know the final structure, but I have such a feeling of freedom and rightness about what we are attempting that I cannot quit. I believe it is of God." And I recalled the energy and excitement when the groups got started, the prayer started flowing, and the changes came in Phenix City, Alabama.